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quakerboy

(13,915 posts)

78. Bibles really will solve the shooting problems!

Sat May 31, 2014, 04:49 PM

May 2014

If we just put in enough that each student is isolated from the others by a 2foot thick parapet of bibles, within a bible wall maze. Each Student only gets the map to their own bible hut within the maze, so none knows where the others are. This way any potential intruders are harmlessly trapped in the bible maze until police can arrive. Then Build a 4 foot thick bible wall around the exterior. If you are ambitious, add some bible traps, where if intruders chose the wrong verse, they are buried by a two ton pallet of bibles falling from the ceiling.

Bam. Bibled! School shooting problem solved!

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Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson says bibles in schools will prevent school shootings [View all] uhnope May 2014 OP

Nearly every school already has at least one Bible in the school library Shoulders of Giants May 2014 #1

Nor stop a church shooting Bernardo de La Paz May 2014 #50

Bibles Scarsdale May 2014 #53

Well, Scarsdale May 2014 #58

OMG. I hadn't heard about that particular atrocity. Sickening. catbyte Jun 2014 #94

Animal abuse Scarsdale Jun 2014 #118

No. No, they're just paper. Bullets go right on through. LadyHawkAZ May 2014 #2

Perhaps you are thinking of Kevlar. Bernardo de La Paz May 2014 #13

Yes, that's what I meant, thanks n/t LadyHawkAZ May 2014 #16

Kevlar Bibles? JeffHead May 2014 #37

Can you imagine how thick a Kevlar bible would be? jmowreader May 2014 #46

Message auto-removed Name removed Jun 2014 #127

Teflon Bibles are good for cooking. klook Jun 2014 #89

Which books can stop a bullet and save your life McCamy Taylor Jun 2014 #111

You beat me to it - TBF May 2014 #27

how I despise these conservative freaks Skittles May 2014 #3

Yeah, give everyone a bible, they can chuck it at the fucking shooter. Autumn May 2014 #4

Why would anyone give two shits what this fool thinks? Laurian May 2014 #5

Throw it at a shooter??? Half-Century Man May 2014 #6

That is not true at all...and no one really believes that. Tikki May 2014 #7

*sigh* Sorry Phil your show has run its course, Its done. 951-Riverside May 2014 #8

Thats why he is going the Palin route... Moostache Jun 2014 #117

Magical fucking thinking... Blue Idaho May 2014 #9

That's probably why they often put them on the nightstands at hotels nolabels May 2014 #51

Only if they're large and lead-plated nt LiberalEsto May 2014 #10

Bible didn't prevent the guy who shot up a Sunday church service. nt Bernardo de La Paz May 2014 #11

Good point perdita9 May 2014 #17

Nor Dr. Tiller. nm SCVDem May 2014 #31

They weren't true christians awoke_in_2003 May 2014 #40

Unitarians. GeorgeGist May 2014 #48

That's because the priest and altar boys didn't have guns bhikkhu May 2014 #82

Phil Robertson said this? SwankyXomb May 2014 #12

his comment handmade34 May 2014 #28

Perhaps if this information was preached in churches instead of the hate the RW gives it might deter Thinkingabout May 2014 #14

Would Bibles on Wall Street prevent greed and theft? perdita9 May 2014 #15

And what does he recommend for preventing rocktivity May 2014 #18

His competitors' duck calls jmowreader May 2014 #29

The guy 2naSalit May 2014 #19

Clearly it worked at this church Blue Owl May 2014 #20

Are they not actors Ahpook May 2014 #21

No. But try sheep bladders. AngryAmish May 2014 #22

Ah...yup Augiedog May 2014 #23

Well said. Louisiana1976 May 2014 #26

Lunatic. nt onehandle May 2014 #24

Hey Phil, you have no clue Mnpaul May 2014 #25

School shootings mainstreetonce May 2014 #30

Are we supposed to stuff them in jackets to make bullet proof vests? Spitfire of ATJ May 2014 #32

Cheaper than kevlar.... paleotn May 2014 #34

Only if you have enough of them: Mythbusters 'Phone Book Armour' LongTomH May 2014 #36

Make a big stack of them and hide behind it. JoePhilly Jun 2014 #124

...and the Quran prevents lightning strikes! nt Earth_First May 2014 #33

Damn...gotta get some of those too. (nt) paleotn May 2014 #35

Dammit!! Who asked Duck Dumbass a question? Thor_MN May 2014 #38

Phil isn't nuts. sulphurdunn May 2014 #39

Liar. SoapBox May 2014 #41

*facepalm* sakabatou May 2014 #42

Well, in the movie Turbineguy May 2014 #43

Theocrats suck blkmusclmachine May 2014 #44

that is quacktabulous thinking there ! lunasun May 2014 #45

Actual ducks shenmue Jun 2014 #109

Yes even cartoon ducks are smarter - Yes even Daffy Duck would call that lunasun Jun 2014 #132

Ah, yes, because that did such a great job in Bath, Wisconsin. CORRECTION: MICHIGAN politicat May 2014 #47

Michigan SCVDem May 2014 #62

Thanks. Apparently, brain on auto-correct=fail mode. politicat May 2014 #64

Damn, didn't know this packman May 2014 #67

I read that a while back and was shocked it had happened all that long ago. Jamastiene Jun 2014 #98

Of course, Phil didn't object when the precept to "love your neighbor" was violated by Jim Crow. n/t radicalliberal May 2014 #49

Not only that Cartoonist May 2014 #52

What is the appeal of this show Gothmog May 2014 #54

Never seen it rpannier May 2014 #56

Because it all worked so well when they integrated the schools. CBHagman May 2014 #55

Apparently Phil and GOP still hasn't learned lesson, if not ever... TRoN33 May 2014 #57

Sounds like he's drumming out a new DD endorsed product. JohnnyRingo May 2014 #59

Phil, just go away. Rhinodawg May 2014 #60

You know how you say "God's Own Party" in Arabic? cactusfractal May 2014 #61

Sure. davidthegnome May 2014 #63

He has an interesting point, though I disagree with the treestar May 2014 #65

Bibles in hotel rooms prevent prostitution and adultery, so why not? hvn_nbr_2 May 2014 #66

I work at a hotel. davidthegnome May 2014 #69

Quite the opposite, Duckman! americannightmare May 2014 #68

I don't know...might work.. abakan May 2014 #70

More likely in that scenario, it would not be one person, but a large group Jamastiene Jun 2014 #99

you have a point.... abakan Jun 2014 #100

He puts daffy in the duck. kairos12 May 2014 #71

Robertson Personifies What Is Wrong About Religion DallasNE May 2014 #72

The Pope does not.. abakan May 2014 #77

"When I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally," jtuck004 May 2014 #73

Maybe they should just try FOLLOWING the Bible Z_California May 2014 #74

Wasn't Hitler a Christian, and therefore "right with God"? Beartracks May 2014 #75

Of course it will stop the shootings, Arthur_Frain May 2014 #76

Bibles really will solve the shooting problems! quakerboy May 2014 #78

God is one of the leading causes of death. BadgerKid May 2014 #79

Bibles in school tooeyeten May 2014 #80

So tiring MFrohike May 2014 #81

Yo, Duck Turd...Crawl back under your rock n/t pauliedangerously May 2014 #83

I've seen people hide guns in hollowed out Bibles. tclambert May 2014 #84

Proving that the the only thing that defeats a good person with a bible is a bigot with a bible. merrily May 2014 #85

Yes, but what will prevent you from opening your mouth and saying stupid shit? DeSwiss Jun 2014 #86

Maybe if you pick the Bible verses very carefully. JDPriestly Jun 2014 #87

Why is it Shadowflash Jun 2014 #88

Phil Robertson for GOP Presidential candidate 2016...looks good to me for.... steve2470 Jun 2014 #90

He was invited to speak at the Republican Leadership Conference. Martin Eden Jun 2014 #91

It says a lot about the GOP's desperation. olddad56 Jun 2014 #92

That they are so fucked up ?? lunasun Jun 2014 #133

Ugh will these idiots ever go away? Initech Jun 2014 #93

Duck Dynasty Season 5 Finale Hits Ratings Low Zorra Jun 2014 #95

And we listen to him why? ebbie15644 Jun 2014 #96

Lol, has he ever actually read the Bible? Jamastiene Jun 2014 #97

A cheap and feckless claim. stopbush Jun 2014 #101

best solution Hoam Skool bookreader451 Jun 2014 #102

Welcome to DU! Agschmid Jun 2014 #103

Thank you bookreader451 Jun 2014 #116

Don't forget to stop by our Welcome & Help forum to say Hi! Agschmid Jun 2014 #123

Religious extremists as well as political extremists are backing themselves into a corner. pinto Jun 2014 #105

Phil for Vice President tooeyeten Jun 2014 #104

Naw dude, Palin/Nugent ticket They_Live Jun 2014 #106

True "Jindal will never ever be president" tooeyeten Jun 2014 #107

Mr. Robertson, how on earth will Bibles help in any form during a shooting? antiGOPin294 Jun 2014 #108

He's talking lead lined Bibles. The kids stuff them in their clothes, use em as body armor. McCamy Taylor Jun 2014 #110

Sorry everyone but Phil is right that bibles in schools might help protect the children. cstanleytech Jun 2014 #112

Yes, let us go back to the Christian days of yore...... DeSwiss Jun 2014 #113

If anything JesterCS Jun 2014 #114

Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson says duck calls in schools will prevent school shootings truthisfreedom Jun 2014 #115

Duck calls Scarsdale Jun 2014 #119

Those who don't learn their history are doomed to repeat it. AtheistCrusader Jun 2014 #120

Depends on how big the bible is vs the momentum of the bullet. yellowcanine Jun 2014 #121

He didn't "touch on" separation of church and state . . . hatrack Jun 2014 #122

Just look at all the killing that the Bible has prevented over the centuries? Duuuuh! Stratosgc Jun 2014 #125

How about other biblical values? DetlefK Jun 2014 #126

Phil and Pat Robertson ... both fake bullshiters ... pbmus Jun 2014 #128

I suppose it might. Arkana Jun 2014 #129

The Taliban feels the same way. Use the Koran to get right with GOD and kill any one that doesn't geretogo Jun 2014 #130

Oh, yes, and scrap those math and science books in Louisiana. Jindal would agree. AlinPA Jun 2014 #131

As nutty as Bill Crozier's idea: using textbooks as shields during school shootings Heidi Jun 2014 #134

Idiot. stranger81 Jun 2014 #135

"Education is useless . . ." another_liberal Jun 2014 #136