This is your Brain on Drug Ads

[jmowreader]

1. My favorite part of these ads...

First they tell you they don't know how the stuff works. The normal way they put this is "the mechanism of action of this product is not completely understood." (But, oh, this is $49,000 per month.)

Then they give you the complete list of known side effects. "This product may cause death in otherwise healthy people, but that's the least of its problems. It caused 29 percent of all patients to grow a fully functional nine-inch penis between their eyebrows, a condition sometimes known as "dickface." Nine percent of patients suffered dangerously high blood pressure. Eleven percent suffered dangerously low BP. Eleven percent of patients were completely cured of cancer by this drug. Eight percent got cancer from it. Two percent suffered complete renal shutdown, and three percent grew new kidneys. One third of the patients who grew new kidneys grew so many they're now considered walking organ banks. In essence, we have no fucking idea what this drug does."

And then comes the punch line: Ask your doctor if this drug is right for you. I think that was decided when I found out I stand a three-in-ten chance of walking around with a huge schlong growing out of my face.