I'm cracking up here over a memory that just popped into my head. [View all]

[LuckyCharms]

I was a young teenager. I hadn't had sex yet.

I got some kind of weird looking painless sore in my pubic region...about where your pubic hair would be.

So, like what every other normal teenage boy would think..."IT'S SYPHILIS"!!!!

I started asking all of my dumbass friends..."Hey, can you get syphilis from dry humping"?

And of course, they all answered "yes".

I became a nervous wreck for weeks. I kept hoping the sore would go away, but it didn't. I lost sleep over it, and my school work suffered.

I finally decided that I needed to go to the health department to get looked at. I didn't want to go to my doctor because I didn't want my mom to know I had syphilis.

The nearest health department was about 10 miles away. A friend of mine took a bus there with me.

While we were riding on the bus, I heard...

MEOW.

My friend and I looked at each other. Heard it again...

MEOW.

I turned around, and there was this woman sitting in the opposite aisle, slightly behind us. She had on a long flowing dress, and high heels that must have been about 6 inches. She was in her 50's or 60's.

She looked at me, winked, and went "MEOW".

I didn't know what to do. I probably blushed a little bit, and turned back around. My friend just stared straight ahead, petrified.

She kept doing it.

MEOW

MEOW

MEOW

I started meowing back at her.

MEOW

MEOW

MEOW

We meowed at each other until she pulled the cord and got off at her stop. She got off the bus, and started running down the street, in those high heels, faster than I've ever seen a human being run in my life. She was Usain Bolt of the cat world.

We got to the health department. The doctor was an older man, and I told him I had syphilis. He looked at the sore and said something like "You're fine young man. that sore will go away".

THE END