I'm a dumbass (contains non-gory injury photo). [View all]

[LuckyCharms]

Every Sunday, the woman down the street has been calling my wife at about 200PM for 3 years...to bring my dog over to her house for a "nail appointment". She did my dogs nails, groomed him, and sometimes even bathed him She was in love with my pup.

We met this woman about 15 years ago when we got flooded. She had to demolish their entire first floor and rebuild. I went over there and demolished her tub and tub surround for her...and we have been friends with her ever since.

My wife told me this morning that she "had a limb come down", so I told my wife that I would go and take care of it. My wife had a fit and told me not to, because I'm suffering from a bit of depression. and she didn't want me doing anything remotely dangerous.

I went down there anyway with a pole chain saw, a reciprocating saw with a pruning blade, and a couple of pruners.

Well, it wasn't just a limb, it was half of the freaking tree and it took me about 5 hours to take care of.

I had a saw over my head, and I thought I was positioned correctly while cutting off a limb. I was wrong. It was a 5 or 6 inch thick limb and there was some tension on it that I didn't notice because...well, I'm a fucking dumbass.

When it fell, it headed toward my eyes and would have resulted in bad things if I didn't get my arm up quick enough to divert it away from my face.

Below is a pic of part of the result. I won't show you the whole injury, because I don't want to get my thread locked.The bruises run up to my armpit and onto my chest.

I'm pretty proud of myself for my cat-like reflexes while pushing age 68. I'm not proud of the fact that I'm a dumb fuck.