The DU Lounge

Munificence

(493 posts)

109. Slicker than a Minnow's Dick

Tue Jan 29, 2013, 03:40 AM

Jan 2013

Lower than whale shit
Lower than a snakes belly
Crazy as a bed bug
Use it up and wear it out, make it do or do without.
You can always tell an Indian summer by "Apache" fog.
Worthless as the teats (tits) on a boar hog. (Boar is a MALE hog when identifying sex of a hog/pig )
Colder than a well diggers ass.
1 card short of a full deck
Out to pasture (old and worthless)
Egg suckin' dog (one that is unable to get over bad habits)
About as bright as a lampshade
Built like a brick outhouse
A quilt of many colors

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

112 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

Best folksy sayings [View all] WilliamPitt Jan 2013 OP

Busier than a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs. In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #1

If you keep goin' the way you're headed, pretty soon you're gonna get there siligut Jan 2013 #2

Slicker than snot on a glass doorknob. bluedigger Jan 2013 #3

So confused Sekhmets Daughter Jan 2013 #4

so he closes one eye and farts mokawanis Jan 2013 #11

That I had never heard...but it sure is fitting! Sekhmets Daughter Jan 2013 #16

Butter my ass and call me a biscuit! ohiosmith Jan 2013 #5

HAHAHAHAHA! DearHeart Jan 2013 #20

crazier than a shit house rat fizzgig Jan 2013 #6

Heave and set like a ram at a gatepost Glorfindel Jan 2013 #7

Suve silmad, talve hambad LiberalEsto Jan 2013 #8

love that !! Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #45

This Minnesotan loves your sage Mother's observation. myrna minx Jan 2013 #88

Maybe not best but made me laugh my ass off OriginalGeek Jan 2013 #9

My late father's favorite... llmart Jan 2013 #73

That would gag a maggot Burma Jones Jan 2013 #10

Got a $50 haircut on a nickel head..... Hysterical Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #44

"Gag a maggot" is one of my personal favorites. Evokes all kinds of lovely images. Demoiselle Jan 2013 #94

All hat and no cattle mokawanis Jan 2013 #12

what does that mean? like a wannabe cowboy? Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #23

I think it means someone who talks big mokawanis Jan 2013 #29

10 gallon hat on a five gallon head. trof Jan 2013 #70

I am in Texas now and I know that it is a big deal for someone to wear a cowboy hat when they Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #96

It was the title of a George W. Bush website.... Demoiselle Jan 2013 #95

Couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel. n/t agracie Jan 2013 #13

that one always cracks me up! nt BlancheSplanchnik Jan 2013 #72

My Dad's favorite, it must be since he said it so often! Dyedinthewoolliberal Jan 2013 #14

My Dad had one..... llmart Jan 2013 #74

"If my aunt had wheels she'd be a pastry cart." The Velveteen Ocelot Jan 2013 #15

love that...what does it mean? Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #24

It express how a situation would be different if something else had been different, and The Velveteen Ocelot Jan 2013 #28

ROTFL!! "If my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle." nolabear Jan 2013 #34

No way. That's hysterical ! Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #46

"Couldn't hit a bull in the ass with a bass fiddle." winter is coming Jan 2013 #17

Couldn't hit the broad side of a barn... kasanti Aug 2014 #112

You can put lipstick on a pig and call it Monique Boomerproud Jan 2013 #18

Wish wonders and shit blunders graywarrior Jan 2013 #19

Shit Fire and save your matches! DearHeart Jan 2013 #21

That's smoother than whipped owl shit NightWatcher Jan 2013 #22

"I started out with nothin', panader0 Jan 2013 #25

Slower than molasses in January... Scruffy Rumbler Jan 2013 #26

(Lady) You're about a half a bubble off of plumb.... Wounded Bear Jan 2013 #27

If he had a brain, it would be lonesome. BarbaRosa Jan 2013 #30

Busier than a kitten in a yarn factory Paulie Jan 2013 #31

Fine as frog fur n/t TexasBushwhacker Jan 2013 #32

Busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest. Grammy23 Jan 2013 #33

Or.... llmart Jan 2013 #75

My man is red hot; your man ain't doodly-squat! nolabear Jan 2013 #35

Busier'n a one-legged man in an ass kickin' contest. nolabear Jan 2013 #36

Busier'n a one-armed paper hanger Major Nikon Jan 2013 #84

Weird one from my dad mokawanis Jan 2013 #37

Damn, that one lillypaddle Jan 2013 #39

well, lillypaddle Jan 2013 #38

Do you want me to Cut Bait or Fish In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #40

Heard it the other way.... Wounded Bear Jan 2013 #60

Sometimes a play on words will change the intent. In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #63

My Dad's version.... llmart Jan 2013 #76

I'll bet I've heard every one of your Dad's sayings. In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #77

LOL llmart Jan 2013 #78

Backhanding any child is a bit much but when your Dad was child that In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #79

I sure do. llmart Jan 2013 #80

Now. That's a beautiful story. In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #82

My grandmother used to say that union_maid Jan 2013 #91

Okay, I got it. But that's my story and I'm sticking to it. In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #92

full of piss and vinegar. and. who is fucking this monkey: me or you? and. Tuesday Afternoon Jan 2013 #41

My mother would often say, "Don't come running to me if you break your leg!" Ptah Jan 2013 #42

For $5 more dollars he could have gotten red Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #43

New broom sweeps good FLSurfer Jan 2013 #47

Gosh, I'm as lost as last week's paycheck, 4_TN_TITANS Jan 2013 #48

"I'm so broke I can't even pay attention." MerryBlooms Jan 2013 #49

"there's a lid for every pot" Party Favors Jan 2013 #50

Tight as Dick's hat band. msatty99 Jan 2013 #51

forgot one... Party Favors Jan 2013 #52

"Running around like my feet were on fire and my ass was catchin" alarimer Jan 2013 #53

the way I heard this was msatty99 Jan 2013 #55

Thank the Lard for nosy neighbors!... Phentex Jan 2013 #54

"it's all fun and games Texasgal Jan 2013 #56

... ScreamingMeemie Jan 2013 #83

More nervous than a long-tailed cat WolverineDG Jan 2013 #57

Stick to the main tent and avoid the sideshows. Raven Jan 2013 #58

Skittish as spit on a hot skillet. redqueen Jan 2013 #59

Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey...nt Wounded Bear Jan 2013 #61

The secretary where I used to work came from Virginia. Denninmi Jan 2013 #62

I'm sweatin' like a whore in church (can only be said by the ladies) a la izquierda Jan 2013 #64

wherever you go, there you are grasswire Jan 2013 #65

Shit or get off the pot. LNM Jan 2013 #66

"Take the rag off the bush" msatty99 Jan 2013 #67

"Doesn't have a pot to piss in, a window to throw it out of, or a yard for it to land on." winter is coming Jan 2013 #68

"Grab a root and growl!" CrazyOrangeCat Jan 2013 #69

Them pants fit you a little too quick. trof Jan 2013 #71

"I haven't seen you since Hector was a pup." "I believe I'd start painting that porch from the ScreamingMeemie Jan 2013 #81

Hotter'n a March hare Major Nikon Jan 2013 #85

Hotter'n a bride's breath in June..... Wounded Bear Jan 2013 #99

Hotter'n a two dollar pistol kasanti Aug 2014 #111

fun thread. :) love_katz Jan 2013 #86

Win on Sunday, Sell on Monday. PuffedMica Jan 2013 #87

He could screw up a two car funeral mcar Jan 2013 #89

Uglier than a hat full of bugs. n/t A HERETIC I AM Jan 2013 #90

Madder 'n hornet in a mayonaisse jar n/t union_maid Jan 2013 #93

Trying to turn a sow's ear into silk purse. Arctic Dave Jan 2013 #97

don't piss on an electric fence! rurallib Jan 2013 #98

Useful as a screen door on a submarine. vanlassie Jan 2013 #100

"I'm as happy as a guy with two dicks" Hassin Bin Sober Jan 2013 #101

Jumpier than a virgin at a raptor_rider Jan 2013 #102

Name that show raptor_rider Jan 2013 #103

Does a bear shit in the woods? Not a polar bear! RedCloud Jan 2013 #104

Fine Words Butter No Parsnips muriel_volestrangler Jan 2013 #105

He's lower than a snake's belly in a wagon rut. Gidney N Cloyd Jan 2013 #106

If momma ain't happy, nobody's happy. Gidney N Cloyd Jan 2013 #107

"He could talk the maggot off a chop" velvet Jan 2013 #108

Slicker than a Minnow's Dick Munificence Jan 2013 #109

He/She doesn't have the sense God gave geese! TuxedoKat Jan 2013 #110