Ask the Po-Po anything. Seriously. Ask.

[TheDeputy]

87. Naked Bacon

1st was a guy who was frying bacon while naked. The bacon grease splattered and...well...your imagination can take care of the rest.

2nd was a woman who saw a deer get hit by a car. The deer had two broken legs and wasn't going anywhere. This kind-hearted but dim-witted lady charged the deer while screaming "poor baby" and hugged it. The deer did not take kindly to this and beat the hell out of her with his two working legs.

Next was a guy at jail. He was drunk and was banging his head on a window to get attention. I said, "maybe if you do it harder they will listen." I was a rookie and didn't realize what drunks will do. He stepped back and did it harder and promptly knocked himself out.

4th. Sometimes undercover guys must participate in an interview with a suspect or have to go to the station for whatever reason. They wear ski masks to hide their identities. One of the UC guys forgot his ski mask when he had to go to headquarters, so he put on one of his kids' giant horse head masks and walked into work.

5th. The numerous incidents where a couple is using handcuffs in the bedroom...and lose the keys.