The drama in the face instead of a couple thousand miles removed sounds like a red flag--
and possibly what could drive a wedge between you and your spouse.
The push/pull of family is a really tough situation.
Is it possible the single parent of 4 and couch surfer would want to move in with you and your spouse?
Would your spouse be able to say 'no' if the question was broached and you were already there? Do you
think your spouse would be asked to provide financial support to either of his siblings and their families
if you were closer?
Has his family been accepting of your marriage? If so, is it because you've been long distance?
Do you think their acceptance would change if you were to be in the same location?
What are the job prospects for both of you in Kentucky?
What are the chances you'd be able to sell your house in WA? If you had to walk away from your WA house,
what do you think the chances are it would hurt your credit? Is it possible that if your credit took a hit,
it would affect your ability to find a job?
Is your spouse leaning towards the move? Will it affect your relationship if you decide that the cons outweigh the pros of moving for you, and you don't want to go? Would you go anyway--and possibly resent it? Or would your spouse respect
your feelings and tell his family the move doesn't work for both of you? And, if THAT decision drives a wedge
between him and his family, will he end up resenting it and holding you responsible?
These are just a few questions that come to me from what you've written.
So, I guess my advice would be for you both to think of as many questions as possible that you'd both like to have
answered before a decision is made, and then sit down and really talk through both the questions and answers
before coming to a decision.
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