Fuck it! Here's a sneak preview of the mystery/suspense novel I've been working on

[retrowire]

22. Thank you immensely for the feedback

The constructive criticisms help guide me and the praise let's me know that I'm doing something right and this is worth sharing.

Regarding your concern for the cell phone issue, I tried covering that in the first chapter here:

"

Suddenly, Michael felt another hit of anxiety in his chest. His parents. They must be worried out of their minds. Any parent's worst nightmare would be their child not coming home from school. He immediately felt guilt for not being responsible, but then on the other hand, he felt a sense of arrogant righteousness as he remembered all the times they refused to get him that cell phone he wanted. That could have prevented this after all.

Basically his parents caused that.

And regarding the student phone thing and all that. When I went to high school (03-07), all the phones in the building were advanced telenet phones. In order to dial out of the building you had to hit a specific combination of numbers first, then the dial tone would happen and voila you could call home.

Michael is in that situation, not everyone knows the code to dial out and he's one of them.

I totally agree with you regarding how choppy some of it is, I'll work on that. Plus, the pitch black staircase, I should definitely get more creative with that.

I am immensely happy that you're enjoying it at all though so I'm going to get back to work on this soon. Thank you!