Need some help from southerners here.

[dixiegrrrrl]

11. I transplanted to the South over 30 years ago

and what I learned is you have to think of Southerners as casually formal...

You can strike up a conversation with any southerner, and they will talk and talk about general things forever, but you will not know what they are really thinking, esp. about politics and religion unless they know you well, cause that is not discussed outside of close friends, family, or a topical meeting.
See, that is the secret to how people get along down here, where most live with a very strong sense of community.
You HAVE to get along, so you don't talk about divisive stuff on a casual basis.

any southerner with decent manners will not speak negatively to someone they do not know well.

and there are subtle ways to recognize what they are thinking, but it takes time to learn the code, so to speak.
half the time the code is in what is not said.


so to get along on a casual basis, just practice good manners, say please and thank you and say nice things about what you like about being in the South, and before you know it, people here will be saying " why. she was so nice you couldn't even tell she was a Yankee".