How few anti-homosexual viewpoints can a democrat hold or espouse and still be considered a bigot?

[Duncan Grant]

16. I'm reminded of this Elie Wiesel quote:

“The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference.”

-- Elie Wiesel

Not to put words in your mouth but your hypothetical feels like "indifference" to me.

You asked, "What about if I actively promote 2 or 3 or 10 pro-gay policies; but am agnostic on the equal marriage cause/right, am I a bigot?"

I think if one is "agnostic" on equal marriage but "pro-gay" in many other ways, one doesn't really understand the contemporary struggle of gay people in this hostile culture. And indifference to gay people at this moment in our history is a form of bigotry. It's passive bigotry, but no less destructive (imho).