I got that on one side of the family, too. It's partly because the Irish strain of Catholicism had a lot of Janesenist influences in it, and developed a strong bunker mentality with political overtones as a response to English occupation and persecution. Very tribal, Irish Catholicism. Very controlling and dualistic-- there were two approaches to everything, the (Irish) Catholic way, and the WRONG way.
But pretty much all the religions that had any real influence in North America (except Native American spiritual practice, and that had a pretty narrow influence, and operated 'underground' even there) were essentially tools of the patriarchy. As such, it was necessary for them to control women by defining us, our roles, and our sexuality, very rigidly.
In the 60s and 70s when lesbians began to find their voices, they were only marginally welcome in both the feminist movement and the gay pride movement, so there was a strong element of "identity enforcement" needed for empowerment and cohesion. I couldn't go there, either, though some women I love very much did.
I *understand* the role of gender, sex, and identity in politics, it just never was much of a fit for me. I'm very, very grateful to those who fought the hard fights that made it possible for me to be more open about myself now, though. Those were important fights undertaken by brilliant and passionate and powerful people, and I honor them.
appreciatively,
Bright
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