and there is some science to back that up.
There are many kinds of sexual expression within one's orientation (vanilla, SM, BD, etc) just as there are kinds of religions to follow (Catholic, Methodist, Muslim, Buddhist, etc) as expressions of faith -- if one has faith. I see a humanist or atheist path as equally valid as any religion or faith. The brain has wiring for expression in both realms.
I say "faith" (to include lack of faith) as opposed to "religion" because faith and religion are entirely separable just as sex and sexual expression are entirely separable.
For instance, I have faith in Something Greater and a life beyond the physical. What either of those might be, I haven't a clue. I don't have religion because I don't feel a need to dig beyond that. I'll know when/if I get there. It simply Is, and I'm completely at peace with that; I feel no need to attempt to unscrew the Inscrutable. Everyone else's mileage will vary. That's faith.
"Religion" attempts to homogenize and depersonalize the experience of faith; yet, no matter how much dogma is thrown at a person, they'll only accept as much as they can experience. How many Catholics, Lutherans, Episcopalians, etc, repeat liturgy Sunday after Sunday whilst admitting in confidence they don't believe everything they're repeating as mass?
As for me, no matter what church I happen to attend (weddings and funerals only, these days), I may respond with the liturgy du jour, but nothing touches my own personal experience of faith. I think that is similar to most people's experience.
At once, I am a gay man. That factor simply Is and I don't feel a need to either to exult or agonize over it. I have experienced many kinds of sexual expression; some gains my enthusiasm; some others do nothing for me at all. Within the realm of being gay (or any orientation) there are many paths to follow for personal fulfillment. One may participate in any kind of scene with a partner, but it's doubtful any experience will change the set of acts in which a person will feel fulfilled or satisfied.
It's easy to tell someone to believe something; it's quite another to get them to believe it in entirety. To that end, people do choose religions that fit their experience. It's easy to tell a gay person "just be straight", but in no proven case has orientation actually changed.
I can not believe that anyone can choose to have faith or not, just as one can not choose orientation. Still atheists have a hard row to hoe to put their lack of experience on par with those who do experience faith. It may be equally valid, but try to explain that to people who are wrapped up in religion (whether or not they have an actual faith).
I must agree that the two kinds of struggle for recognition aren't comparable at all; indeed, due to legal and medical implications. Faith is a more touchy subject than sexual orientation. Again, I consider both to be deeply private and personal and neither completely to be a choice.
And BTW, thanks for participating in PFLAG. PFLAG has done much to increase acceptance and visibility of LGBT people. I appreciate it very much.
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