But mostly he was "venting" about how unfair it all was at a high volume.
It was when he told me we weren't being "accommodating" that I replied, "I'm sorry free rent for how many years? I think I've been VERY accommodating."
Then he told me, "That would have been over long ago if you had just signed the papers."
So I said, "NO, it's not up to ME to lie for you. If you wanted a paper saying you paid rent, then you should have paid rent."
AND I hung up. Knowing this is a cyclic argument that neither of us ever "wins" I simply refused to keep engaging.
I think the best analogy I can give him is that it's like my sister built in handicap access to her home and invited him to visit, but another relative also came who was toxic in his viewpoint, so sister offered to let them know when she left or offered another day.
There is accommodation in everything my sister did and we support his right to keep his kids away from someone he considers toxic, but can only do so much.
All the "accommodations" are still in place. My sister still has tickets to the water park for his kids. She is still willing to make a long trip (about 5 cities away) to meet them and spend time with them without her grown daughter there so the kids can have a full day of fun on my sister's dime.
If he doesn't think that is enough, if he decides to push that side of his family away, it's his own loss.
My sister is among the best people I know. Kind and caring and thoughtful. He wants to push that away, he's an idiot. He's an adult and free to make his own choices, but in my opinion it's a self defeating choice.
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