Check with your counties social service dept. In our county we have Elder Care - a group who can advise you on med./legal/social etc. issues. We also have a group of volunteers that come to your home to sit with Alz. pts. so that the caretaker can have some time off.
At one point my PCP offered me home help paid for by medicare. The same may apply for his care and that would remove some of the burden from you.
Some churches offer help.
It may be hard for you to accept right now, but at some point you are going to have to think of yourself first and do what is best for you. It may sound selfish, but it is in his best interest - What would happen to him if you were unable to see to his needs?
Be honest with yourself - when you feel you can no longer care for him at home without causing detriment to you, find a place that can care for him - and do it without guilt on your part. (That is easier said than done - I have been there with two uncles that I loved.)
Loving him as you do makes this harder for you than for him as parts of him are no longer there. You are only human and there is only so much that humans can do. (Accepting this fact is also hard to do.)
My heart goes out to you for what you are going through. Keep in the back of you mind that we (DU) care about you. Prayers.
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