African American

Number23

(24,544 posts)

23. I'm of the mindset that black people can use whatever words we want to describe ourselves

Sat Feb 9, 2013, 05:06 PM

Feb 2013

As intelligent, sentient human beings we've earned that right, wouldn't you say?

As for your son's friend, he has no business using that word -- EVER. And he was asked repeatedly by your son to not use it and especially not in front of him. So in addition to it being disrespectful to black people as a whole, it was incredibly disrespectful to your son and their friendship. I don't blame him one bit for ending the friendship and I also think it was very good of the friend's mother to call you and apologize.

My husband -- not baby daddy, not boyfriend -- the man I officially and formally made a member of my family is white and he knows better than to ever use that word. It's a respect thing more than anything else. And if the respect is not there then nothing else will be either.

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My son has basically ended a friendship [View all] mzteris Feb 2013 OP

That's truly sad for your son. Glassunion Feb 2013 #1

I hope that kid can make it past 14, and get some sense. immoderate Feb 2013 #2

it's a miracle any of them mzteris Feb 2013 #3

When one is a kid pipoman Feb 2013 #4

Please give your son a hug from me Smilo Feb 2013 #5

You should read Randall Kennedy's book FunkyLeprechaun Feb 2013 #6

All is well that ends well... ReRe Feb 2013 #7

I'm curious: If the kid had black, curly hair instead of "flaming red" hair..... Smarmie Doofus Feb 2013 #8

It seems he is objecting... awoke_in_2003 Feb 2013 #11

I understand your point. mzteris Feb 2013 #28

Sorry for your son..He does sound quite mature. Agree completely on the "reclaiming" thing whathehell Feb 2013 #9

You have raised an awesome son. SheilaT Feb 2013 #10

HEAR! HEAR! heaven05 Feb 2013 #12

If this "friend" was saying this word at 8 yrs old, then he was probably repeating the word. glowing Feb 2013 #13

I think the OP means the friend just *recently* started using this word, and tblue37 Feb 2013 #25

No, it says clearly at the beginning that the child said the word at 8, and nearly got glowing Feb 2013 #27

No - his mother is appalled mzteris Feb 2013 #29

Then you are right, he's probably being a smart assed kid. And yes, Mom needed to lay down a little glowing Feb 2013 #33

As teens, it's something they will grow out of, imo Blue_Tires Feb 2013 #41

The youth of NAACP had a 'funeral' for the n-word several years ago duhneece Feb 2013 #14

I don't think ANYONE should use mzteris Feb 2013 #30

Please see the play 'The Vagina Monologues' by Eve Ensler duhneece Feb 2013 #35

Your son remembers the epithet incident TomClash Feb 2013 #15

Can I say it ? I do not know lunasun Feb 2013 #16

Don't like the "w" word either. mzteris Feb 2013 #31

Your son sounds like a great kid ... kudos! brett_jv Feb 2013 #17

But I've noticed its more of a drawn out "A" sound at the end of the word and not a pointed glowing Feb 2013 #22

I fully agree with this bit Number23 Feb 2013 #24

My son is black. mzteris Feb 2013 #32

He's young enough not to understand the reason socialindependocrat Feb 2013 #18

Sounds like you have a great kiddo libodem Feb 2013 #19

I feel bad for your son. Also feel good for him. timdog44 Feb 2013 #20

People come into your life for a season Coolest Ranger Feb 2013 #21

I'm of the mindset that black people can use whatever words we want to describe ourselves Number23 Feb 2013 #23

Yup. aquart Feb 2013 #26

Yup JustAnotherGen Feb 2013 #42

Any word that has to be abbreviated Flying Squirrel Feb 2013 #34

This friend seems to be having a problem at home. Festivito Feb 2013 #36

I've always thought mzteris Feb 2013 #38

Sounds like two or three locked problems. Festivito Feb 2013 #39

Thank you. mzteris Feb 2013 #40

Wise advice. grantcart Feb 2013 #37