Where do you atheists get your morals?

[tpsbmam]

122. When I was 6-years-old, Dad took my big sisters and I fishing....

We were in a dinghy out on the harbor we lived on during the summer at our grandfather's house. My sisters would send up squeals of excitement when they caught something. I was miserable watching those little fish struggling for their lives. Then I managed to catch one myself.....and I started crying and screaming "get it off, get it off!" and made Dad throw it back as soon as he did. I was inconsolable after that and believe me, Dad was NOT happy with me. Didn't matter. All I cared about was that we were hurting and killing those fish and it finished me. We ended up cutting fishing short thanks to the little PITA 6 y.o. whose heart was breaking because of what she'd seen and done.

And I became a vegetarian, the only one in my family.

That never changed. The same applied to people. I was the one who befriended the class rejects, the one who a friend could depend on for a shoulder even at a very young age. There were a few times in my life when I failed to be that kind of good friend, and those are the times I truly rue and which are the things that bug me to this day. I tried all along not to hurt others, again having instances where I failed but I tried overall. Aside from very young childhood stuff with siblings, I've never hit another living thing. And lo and behold, I chose a caring profession as an adult.

Part of that meant doing my best to be honest with myself and others. I didn't live up to that 100% but sure as hell tried and, again, it bugged me when I didn't and informed my future behaviors. It meant, in essence, living by the golden rule -- too often, I treated others better than I thought I deserved to be treated (took a long time to work on that self-confidence & self-esteem).

In short, my moral code seems to have been inborn -- it was, truly, a central part of who I was and who I became as a person. Though my parents were good people and instilled good morals in all of us, I diverged a little.

(I'm really, really far from perfect! I can be a whole lot of things, including snide -- not one of my best qualities. E.g., I live next door to a fundie minister. When we were getting to know each other, I did my best to bite my tongue when he'd say things that drove me crazy -- had to live next to him for the next umpteen years, after all! At one point, he told me he loves hunting -- I cracked, "Oh, so you love killing God's creatures, huh?" I gave him a wink and he laughed, thank goodness! I did sorta mean it though.)

Mom & Dad were believers. They were casual church-goers, Dad more than Mom (don't think she went at all except for ritualistic times after Dad died). We were brought up in the Episcopal church -- I went through the motions but don't recall a time when I was ever really a believer. I finally told Mom & Dad in my teens that I didn't share their beliefs -- fortunately, it was cool. Lucky me!