How did come to be a believer or non-believer?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

6. Not sure - I just sort of drifted into agnosticism.

I was raised in a liberal Christian church (UCC), regularly sang in church choirs for years, but religion just never stuck. I don't hate it; I just don't get it. Religion has caused people to do horrible things and wonderful things: Some of the greatest art, music and architecture was inspired by religious faith - as were some of the worst wars and acts of oppression and persecution. So I guess I came to view religion as a human creation, something that is only as bad or as good as the people who are part of it. It doesn't make good people good or bad people bad. Good people will be good regardless of their religion, but religion can provide a structure for doing good. Bad people will not be prevented from being bad by religion; unfortunately, religion sometimes provides a justification for bad deeds, even if the justification comes from a warped view of doctrine.

I can go to a church service and find it beautiful and uplifting but I still can't find a "god" in it. I can understand why people would find comfort in religion; after all, why wouldn't one want to believe that after you die you will be reunited with your loved ones in a condition of eternal joy? But I've never been able to make that leap of faith. I think Jesus, whoever he was, advocated a philosophy of compassion and selflessness that many people who claim to be Christian would do well to take seriously. But if I don't really believe in "god" I can't believe he was the son of "god," any more than anyone else is.

But I call myself an agnostic rather than an atheist because I have no absolute proof that there is no supreme being. I just don't think there is. But I could be wrong. Maybe there is something - the Force, if you will - that is so far beyond human understanding that we can't get our heads around it, so in order to try to understand the universe we humans invented a god in the image of humans. If there is a god I doubt it's anything like that. Or maybe there's nothing at all. Or maybe we are all ants in an alien child's ant farm. I don't know, but I'm OK with not knowing. And I think Richard Dawkins is an arrogant ass.