The gods are so techie [View all]

[Brainstormy]

I'm writing a book (I know, who isn't?), but in doing the research for a chapter I'm calling "God Goes Digital," I got so tickled I had to stop and share. Here's a smattering.

Digital translations of the Bible have been around for a while, but now the Koran can be read in 1s and 0s, too, even in Saudi Arabia.
Spiritual e-books are clearly the wave of the future. One UK hotel has gone the Gideons one better, providing Kindles instead of Bibles in the rooms.

Rather than schlepping them to the synagogue for the traditional one-on-one lessons in person, tech-savvy Jewish parents can now sign their kids up online for the Easy Bar Mitzvah program.

In India, enterprising entrepreneurs have found a way to simplify, and capitalize on, the traditional practice of making “prasad” offerings, usually of food but sometimes of other gifts, to God or to a Guru at the site of a holy temple or shrine. After logging into the web portal, devotees can choose a temple where they want to make an offering and the day on which they want the prasad to be offered. The company, OnlinePrasad, is diversifying to include other product offerings like idols, gemstones and rudrakshas.

If you’re having a hard time praying, Divineoffice.com boasts over 1,000 prayer apps. (And that’s just the number for catholic prayers!) Prayer apps allow you to “submit your very own prayers, pray for others through your iPhones and iPads, and keep track of your submitted prayers.” Many of these include a scrollable prayer subject list for quick selection. Anger, angst, bad dog, bitch next door, Comcast, creditors, etc., etc.

If you’ve checked out the several models available on Amazon you already know that Muslims no longer need to depend on analog prayer clocks. But you may not know that even the Buddhists are going digital.

Traditional Tibetan prayer wheels (called Mani wheels) are rolls of thin paper, imprinted with many, many copies of a mantra, or prayer. Wheels are often placed where they can be spun by wind or by flowing water or spun by the heat rising from a flame or by steam. Prayer wheels are often spun by people entering a shrine, or along the route which people use as they walk slowly around and around a sacred site -- a form of spiritual practice called circumambulation.

Pretty cool, but SO 2012. For the right price you can now turn your hard drive into a prayer wheel. At the very least you can download a prayer wheel screen saver. His Holiness, the Dalai Lama, has said that having the mantra on your computer works the same as a traditional Mani wheel. As the digital image spins around on your hard drive, it sends the peaceful prayer of compassion to all directions and purifies the area. Mani wheels are available for both Macintosh and Windows systems.

If you need your demons exorcised you can now use Skype. American Evangelical Pastor Bob Larson has built a business by exorcising demons via video chat, using hand gestures–like crossing people’s foreheads by waving his pointer finger in front of the camera, using virtual eye contact, or thrusting a cross at the laptop.

Raptured.com is your guide to making the most of being left behind. Get soon-to-be-raptured friends to leave you their worldly goods to stop them falling into the hands of the worldwide government of Antichrist. Don't miss the map of how the big day will affect US politics.

Finally, from The Fruitcake Zone at Ship of Fools I learned about software that downloads images from pizzacams around the world, and compares them digitally to the face of Christ. Join the search for a cheese feast with anchovies and our Lord now.

(And let me know, please, if you know of other humorous examples. )