Atheists & Agnostics

FailureToCommunicate

(14,608 posts)

20. "I was about to pluck my eye out with the SEAFOOD fork..."

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Mon Jul 14, 2014, 08:41 PM

Jul 2014

"Twenty minutes on and everyone is either asleep or dead.."

Hilariously conveyed, Heddi! Inlaws, where you know you have to make an effort, and anything untoward WILL come back to haunt you, are such an interesting challenge are they not?

You done good.

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Told my sister-in-law I was an Atheist. She nearly had a stroke.... [View all] Heddi Jul 2014 OP

I became an orthodox jew this weekend. Must be some sort of virus. Warren Stupidity Jul 2014 #1

I filmed her response to me in the restaurant Heddi Jul 2014 #2

I joined the ranks of The Intoxicated this weekend. Although great company helped. ChairmanAgnostic Jul 2014 #36

I don't drink. I had no escape. Warren Stupidity Jul 2014 #39

A Masters Degree you say. progressoid Jul 2014 #3

It was pretty amazing. I told her *I* was going to get my Masters in Nursing Heddi Jul 2014 #4

Bwahaha. progressoid Jul 2014 #5

Nicely enough, MSN programs don't require GRE's either Heddi Jul 2014 #6

I never met this woman, but just reading about her Heather MC Jul 2014 #7

She sounds like a narcissist or an idiot, or both. nt raccoon Jul 2014 #35

Tell her you are next going for a masters in ocean science, specifically, ChairmanAgnostic Jul 2014 #37

Rofl. WHen I was like 8 I "made" my own "dirty joke" Heddi Jul 2014 #56

8? That would be perfect for her. ChairmanAgnostic Jul 2014 #58

hilarious read�. dhill926 Jul 2014 #8

LOL, LittleGirl Jul 2014 #9

Better you than me IkeRepublican Jul 2014 #10

Thanks for coming out intaglio Jul 2014 #11

Great post! Auggie Jul 2014 #12

Never got that far Old Codger Jul 2014 #13

Funny story, well told. Thanks for the laugh! (nt) ca3799 Jul 2014 #14

Geez! You handled it a lot better than I would have. LoisB Jul 2014 #15

This would make a great little short story libodem Jul 2014 #16

That was fun/great writing. I just, you know. Looove the vallee guillll talk. Much fun. BlueJazz Jul 2014 #17

Your story had me grinning from start to finish! A HERETIC I AM Jul 2014 #18

I tell them that I'm just a *little* bit more of an Atheist than they are. SeattleVet Jul 2014 #24

Yup. I've used that as well. A HERETIC I AM Jul 2014 #28

"She refused to talk to me for the rest of the weekend" awoke_in_2003 Jul 2014 #19

That is winning!! nt stillwaiting Jul 2014 #45

"I was about to pluck my eye out with the SEAFOOD fork..." FailureToCommunicate Jul 2014 #20

Haaahaaa! aaand that is how You got her to STFU!! hue Jul 2014 #21

There are way too many like her wasting oxygen. Divernan Jul 2014 #22

I'll never forget RedSpartan Jul 2014 #50

Tell her this Zappa quote SHRED Jul 2014 #23

Your "conversion" was perfect. Curmudgeoness Jul 2014 #25

Thanks for the laughs sammythecat Jul 2014 #26

"EVERYONE believes in God" Spitfire of ATJ Jul 2014 #27

Heddi, if you don't have a blog... theHandpuppet Jul 2014 #29

Wear this shirt at your next family get-together klook Jul 2014 #30

Hilarious! Manifestor_of_Light Jul 2014 #31

Unusual for a chemist to do that. In the sciences, it's almost inverse snobbery to avoid eridani Jul 2014 #34

I have my JD as well. RedSpartan Jul 2014 #51

Funny! polly7 Jul 2014 #32

"Twenty minutes on and everyone is either asleep or dead" Hissyspit Jul 2014 #33

"Twenty minutes on and everyone is either asleep or dead" AtheistCrusader Jul 2014 #38

Very nice bit of writing gwheezie Jul 2014 #40

Next week tell her you're converting to Islam - TBF Jul 2014 #41

Heddi, Worried senior Jul 2014 #42

So you are now a convert are you? You do know what the old saying is, don't you? A Simple Game Jul 2014 #43

Your dinner with the SIL reminded me of the scenes below: deucemagnet Jul 2014 #44

That's totally what it was like Heddi Jul 2014 #57

Problem is, you had peace and quiet while she thought you were an Atheist, If rhett o rick Jul 2014 #46

What I would have said about 3 minutes after meeting her: eShirl Jul 2014 #47

Next time use the Basil Fawlty quote... onager Jul 2014 #48

As a full fledged Christian myself... hamsterjill Jul 2014 #49

Here is a funny story, at least to me. RebelOne Jul 2014 #52

Jesus story homegirl Jul 2014 #54

I found Jesus AlbertCat Jul 2014 #60

We used to have a woman at work who ran around injecting the bible into conversations. Fuddnik Jul 2014 #53

oy. beam me up scottie Jul 2014 #55

"Twenty minutes on and everyone is either asleep or dead," AlbertCat Jul 2014 #59