"Elvis is not Jesus Christ!" [View all]

[onager]

Well, don't try to tell my mother that.

(This is just the usual time-wasting filler from me for a slow Sunday afternoon.)

I just finished the excellent book by Alanna Nash, Baby Let's Play House - Elvis Presley and the Women Who Loved Him.

The thread title is from an incident described in the book. Along with the Fundamentalist Xianity he absorbed with his mother's milk, Presley later absorbed a lot of half-baked woo-woo and quasi-religious ideas.

(The Mean Part: reading Elvis' jabberings about personal mysticism and exotic religions is a lot like...uh...reading a Certain DU Group...)

Of course, Elvis also had his own court of yes-men, hangers-on, and general dick-holders, the "Memphis Mafia."

One of the goofiest of the M.M. was Presley's favorite hairdresser, Larry Geller. Geller was and is an absolute woo-woo. Even today, four decades A.E. (After Elvis), Geller still describes himself as "Elvis' hairstylist and spiritual adviser."

In March 1967, Presley was desperately trying to lose weight for his next no-god-awful movie. According to Nash:

Elvis tried burning the weight off with Dexedrine, but on top of the sleeping tablets, the Demerol, his usual arsenal of mood-altering drugs, and restricted food intake, the medications made him dizzy.

Sometime late on the night of March 9, Elvis got up to use the toilet...tripped over the TV cord in the bathroom, and hit his head on the sunken tub...

That poor guy didn't have much luck in bathrooms, did he? In this case he only had a mild concussion, but the accident sent his manager "Col." Tom Parker off on a personal jihad:

...there would be no more discussion about religion. "Some of you," the Colonel mocked, looking around the room, "think maybe Elvis is Jesus Christ who should wear robes and walk down the street helping people. But that's not who he is." The guys should not allow Larry (Geller) to be alone with Elvis, he directed.

Ha! Well, ol' Tom Parker was a former carnival barker and major BS artist himself. So I guess it makes sense that he was a pretty good detector of other people's BS.

Usual Annoying Personal Trivia: I didn't think much of Elvis in my younger years. I mostly knew him from those cornball movies, and lectures from my family about what a non-smoking, non-drinking, non-drugging...cough...paragon of virtue he was.

But not long ago, I had my own Elvis epiphany, when I saw the video collection called "Elvis - The Final Curtain." This is all stuff filmed during Presley's last concert tour in the summer of 1977...just weeks before he died.

In many of the videos, often shot by fans on prehistoric Super-8 film, Presley looks like he has one foot in the grave and the other one on a roller skate. In some others he looks almost like his old self - energetic, kidding with the fans, etc.

My epiphany came during some footage CBS-TV shot for their "Elvis In Concert" show (which aired after Presley died). This was a bad night - Presley is shaking, sweating, slurring his speech, and looks even more bloated than usual.

Then he sits down at the piano, starts to play, and belts out "Unchained Melody." Not the easiest song to sing, but he nails every note. Just an amazing performance...especially considering that he must have been in severe physical and mental pain at the time.