I use to believe/think that men could be feminists

[bettyellen]

238. oh it's a mix with trolls in there, but sometimes it's hard to tell. mostly it's guys who have a

particular bone to pick about feminism, and want to discuss it from the position of a feminist. sometimes they engage in reasonable discussion- but far more frequently they will not. but very often they agree *on paper* with one aspect of women's rights, have never really given feminism any thought or discussion here before, and have stumbled upon an aspect (new to them) that sticks in their craw. they only ever come to vent and criticize, and want to wear the label while doing it.

often they just don't get the why or the female POV... but they won't ask, they want to come in and say- hey girls, stop it- that part of what you're doing offends me, and i think it's trivial. (ironically they'll say we're wasting time- not realizing we're wasting time on their ilk) *Please cater to my feelings over what you all think is truly important because I'm a feminst too.* and the hurt feelings turn hostile the minute you don't agree. every feminist thread gets one or two. So, it gets trollish either way- disrupting and making it all about themselves. are we supposed to individually revoke their feminist labels- or just admit that by and large, guys don't ever get 90% of it, and maybe shouldn't attmept to speak as authorities, so to speak.

for obnoxious men, it's like a moth to the flame. feminist blogs are great, but it's rare you ever want to look at the comments. and unfortunately, they often speak louder and more frequently than real feminists' allies do. so what do we do with that?