History of Feminism

4Q2u2

(1,406 posts)

110. Honest Question From a Person Looking for Insight

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 02:29 PM

Mar 2013

I ask not out of spite or offense but out of my ignorance. I think I understand the basic tenets that you are looking for in society. My question kind of delves a little deeper to interpersonal relationships.

What is the true equality that you are looking for from a man or men?
Knowing my imperfections and finding common ground, you and I become Friends and we are together.

What would our language be, or look like?

My back round is I am the youngest boy out of 7. I served in the Military for 22yrs and have been involved in the construction trades for over 20 yrs as well. Yes, lots of testosterone filled arenas. I give you this info not for my state of mind but rather I do not know what I do not know.

For the OP itself, I do know that telling someone to sit down and shut up is pretty condescending, and to tell someone that their issues are not as important as others is basic restriction of speech. What is more fundamental in this society than self determination? What is important to me is important to me, you may not agree with it but no one has the right to silence it. Nor do you have to comment or try to diminish it by ridicule. If a tree falls on my house, you may not think it a big deal, but hell it is a big deal to me and that is what should matter.

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I don't know about you folks [View all] boston bean Mar 2013 OP

It's completely fucked up BainsBane Mar 2013 #1

Be aware...some anti-women talk may be from "plants" from the right side. Seems to me we didn't.... BlueJazz Mar 2013 #28

I have noticed BainsBane Mar 2013 #29

Yeh, things are getting really bad Whisp Mar 2013 #55

Unfortunately, yes. I find myself not posting very much anymore for that reason. LiberalLoner Mar 2013 #77

for 19yrs on every visit, my father in law makes at least 1, but generally 2, 3, 4 sexist "jokes". seabeyond Mar 2013 #2

dammit. I wasn't aware of "the latest" BlancheSplanchnik Mar 2013 #35

I had a FIL like that too Isoldeblue Mar 2013 #40

And to be derided by a female DUer who disagrees with some opinions-- that we have no right to speak hlthe2b Mar 2013 #3

exactly BainsBane Mar 2013 #56

The ol' Straw (Wo)man tactic, I see. Hulk Smash Mar 2013 #4

I have no idea what you mean? nt boston bean Mar 2013 #5

I would strongly advise you to clarify that statement. n/t hlthe2b Mar 2013 #7

They're just mad that we're calling shit out. redqueen Mar 2013 #6

they are just skeered little boys, boston bean Skittles Mar 2013 #8

I can't tell if you are being serious? boston bean Mar 2013 #25

deadly serious Skittles Mar 2013 #53

btw, 14? out of 19 rec are men. certain menz LUVZ them that post. nt seabeyond Mar 2013 #9

I would say not all of us menz lurves that stuff. geek tragedy Mar 2013 #75

i will edit.... lol. true that. nt seabeyond Mar 2013 #76

Classic Texasgal Mar 2013 #10

I heard this on Mellissa Perry's show today Isoldeblue Mar 2013 #11

"Eat dirt".... ! seabeyond Mar 2013 #13

Thanks. Right back at 'cha :) The high five part..... Isoldeblue Mar 2013 #32

i think most of us walked into it like you did. this is a favorite cartoon, that i am posting all seabeyond Mar 2013 #33

That is powerful! Isoldeblue Mar 2013 #34

You are not alone MadrasT Mar 2013 #39

wow! That's a hella cartoon BlancheSplanchnik Mar 2013 #38

Love it! CrispyQ Mar 2013 #80

That's really great. TDale313 Mar 2013 #103

it is great. i do love it also. and... seabeyond Mar 2013 #109

WTF?!! Who the hell said that? Fat asses? Feeding on bon bons? tblue37 Mar 2013 #12

It was one of the low points I've ever seen on DU and that saying a lot..... Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #14

I remember that poster. Why did they leave. boston bean Mar 2013 #24

She was a lawyer from San Francisco IIRC, lesbian and one of the coolest people Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #27

really a testament to berating that can go on here. boston bean Mar 2013 #30

Losing her was enormous to me and totally unnecessary...but I tell myself its just Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #36

Nothing for you to be sorry about. boston bean Mar 2013 #37

I had a mother, and I have sisters and nieces and more female friends than I can number Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #41

It's people like you and most boston bean Mar 2013 #44

That was 45 years ago. And minor compared to what most gay kids go through... Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #46

i am with BB seabeyond Mar 2013 #42

Wasn't it she who lost her keys redqueen Mar 2013 #47

She's 1 of only two DUers I'v ever spoken to on the phone (tried to arrange to meet in New Orleans) Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #48

It was to me as well MuseRider Mar 2013 #79

She kept me from leaving years ago when I was so pissed off about bashing of southerners.... Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #89

Oh I do get it. MuseRider Mar 2013 #91

I've posted a lot less in the last few years. It just isn't as much fun. I post a bit in GD and Rowdyboy Mar 2013 #92

my son seabeyond Mar 2013 #94

I am hanging in too but it is hard sometimes. MuseRider Mar 2013 #113

Looks like the Equal Protection Act is coming back in the form of the ballot at the next election DhhD Mar 2013 #15

That's the type of comment I'd expect on Yahoo Answers or YouTube, Jamaal510 Mar 2013 #16

There was also another that said feminists are anti-sex. nt boston bean Mar 2013 #58

Far as I am concerned almost anytime anyone brings sex into the argument MadrasT Mar 2013 #59

+1. these men and some women that are insulting our sexuality with lack are NO different than those seabeyond Mar 2013 #61

"It is ALL trying to control women through continual commentary about their sexuality." redqueen Mar 2013 #71

It seems it is perfectly OK here to label a person or opinion "prudish". MadrasT Mar 2013 #72

puritanical/puritan is the new code word. We must try to keep up. nt boston bean Mar 2013 #74

Someone alerted on that post, I hope. davidthegnome Mar 2013 #17

You can go out to meta and look for a thread titled boston bean Mar 2013 #18

I was called a "petty nanny" and "apoplectic" SunSeeker Mar 2013 #19

Sorry that happened to you. boston bean Mar 2013 #20

Do you have a link to the thread you are talking about? SunSeeker Mar 2013 #21

Have you ever visited the META forum? nt boston bean Mar 2013 #22

Yikes. I see what you mean. Sheesh. nt SunSeeker Mar 2013 #23

There are many guys who stand next to you. longship Mar 2013 #26

Another K & R davidthegnome Mar 2013 #31

longship. david. seabeyond Mar 2013 #43

REAL men ARE feminists Skittles Mar 2013 #54

Who the fuck eats 'Bon Bons'? ismnotwasm Mar 2013 #45

what the fuck are they? i was wonderin' myself. seabeyond Mar 2013 #49

Ew ismnotwasm Mar 2013 #50

lol. personally, i go for the sees assorted. luv my sees. seabeyond Mar 2013 #51

I have to take a shower anyway ismnotwasm Mar 2013 #52

These are bon bons BainsBane Mar 2013 #57

i really appreciated the fact you pointed out that study was fuckin' 1988. seabeyond Mar 2013 #62

I got the funniest thank you note from a friend years ago. CrispyQ Mar 2013 #81

lol! Funny & nice. I'm stealing that one :) Little Star Mar 2013 #88

Speaking as a new member, I can tell you that Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #60

it wont be deleted and you wont be thrown off cause.... seabeyond Mar 2013 #63

I ditto every single word of this post! Helen Reddy Mar 2013 #65

You are right. I have been supporting DU and I need to stop. Shit. Because you know, I really LiberalLoner Mar 2013 #78

I'd like to apologize to the members of this group. Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #85

ah sheldon, lol. i was not bothered an iota by your post. seabeyond Mar 2013 #86

It didn't bother me either. MadrasT Mar 2013 #87

so, this is how it pans out. we are told by the menz that we can speak out about Quvenzhan� seabeyond Mar 2013 #64

When you have the maturation capacity Helen Reddy Mar 2013 #66

There is an interesting correlation between those who sufrommich Mar 2013 #67

i agree. very sad. i watch woman after woman walk away. and listen to others that care not a seabeyond Mar 2013 #68

I do too, Sea. sufrommich Mar 2013 #69

Yep. The feminist groups here were SO VERY IMPORTANT to some, until they weren't... redqueen Mar 2013 #73

I didn't know about Obamanut2012 leaving:( Little Star Mar 2013 #82

I loved reading both of them! CrispyQ Mar 2013 #98

Well... MadrasT Mar 2013 #70

I'm glad I missed that. CrispyQ Mar 2013 #83

"Plus there are a lot of assholes who just want to stir shit up." redqueen Mar 2013 #84

If you look at the Recs in that Meta thread DURHAM D Mar 2013 #90

The 'Uppity feminists who disagree with me make me feel oogy, but redqueen Mar 2013 #93

perusing this morning, thinking, not one of these women ever discuss women issues or feminist issues seabeyond Mar 2013 #95

Judging by all the ranting, we are only supposed to speak up redqueen Mar 2013 #96

They are traditionalists. DURHAM D Mar 2013 #106

the oldest more willing to follow. the youngest will buck the system, though probably seabeyond Mar 2013 #108

I didn't understand that OP at all so I didn't comment directly on it. MadrasT Mar 2013 #97

lol lol. i LUVs your post of confusion. seabeyond Mar 2013 #99

Nuance and I do not get along well. MadrasT Mar 2013 #100

this. i couldnt remember exactly what you had said the other day, but yes. seabeyond Mar 2013 #101

In the dictionary, you may find my picture right next to the word "literal". MadrasT Mar 2013 #102

I will be sitting next to you MuseRider Mar 2013 #104

Yeah, it's not lack of smarts. It's just being "wired" for literalness. MadrasT Mar 2013 #111

"How can anyone else tell you what to think? What does that even mean" DURHAM D Mar 2013 #105

Love this explanation. redqueen Mar 2013 #107

That is an interesting explanation and seems to ring true. MadrasT Mar 2013 #112

'And what is so hard about just saying "I disagree" without turning it into a nasty cage fight?' CrispyQ Mar 2013 #115

"The admins seemed to have checked out & no longer care" Scout Mar 2013 #114

Honest Question From a Person Looking for Insight 4Q2u2 Mar 2013 #110

For me it's really about respect BainsBane Mar 2013 #117

gotta tell ya BB. that picture is absolutely perfect. every time i get on the puter and come in seabeyond Mar 2013 #116

Lordy it's still going on MadrasT Mar 2013 #118

Lady Freedom Returns says she is leaving BainsBane Mar 2013 #119