death though, she wanted hope. She knew of course that there was no hope as time went by.
It's funny, she came from a generation who barely were able to utter the word "cancer"
She didn't want attention and she very seldom told anyone of her diagnosis.
It caused a bit of an issue in our family.
My family is all in Scotland. She corresponded with her sister a lot but only told her that she was 'sick'
My aunt arranged to fly over to Canada for a visit that fall. When I spoke to my Mum about my aunt coming over she insisted that she not be told of her terminal illness.
This bothered me. Kept me up nights and started to really take it's toll on my heart. I was so upset. As a sister I would want to know.
I "overstepped my bounds" and called my aunt, missing her by a few minutes but my uncle answered.
I explained to him that if Mary wanted to see my Mum while alive she should change her flight to ASAP!
Yes, it was getting that close.
~tears~
Anyway, Mary changed her flight to come later that week. I picked her up at the airport on the Thursday night. She was justifiably upset but thankful that I had called and told her the truth.
Mum was pretty much out of it and had been out of it for a couple of weeks. Comfortable but no longer verbal. Sleep induced by the drugs Haloperidol and Morphine.
I tried to prepare my aunt for what she would see and to let her know Mum probably wouldn't know her or respond to her. 
Long story short (sorry it was so long) Mum was hallucinating a bit and was making sounds. When my aunt approached her and asked her if she knew her, Mum said something like "aye" (keep in mind she's Scottish) Aye was something she said when she would stir when it was time for meds.
Anyway it was enough for Mary.. her sister knew her, she said "aye" when asked if Mum knew her.
Mum died the following day.
I don't ever regret making that call.
kesha.
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