Why does Gowdy cut his hair to look like a conehead?

[Eyeball_Kid]

4. Nonsense. There's a gerbil hidden up there.

It's as irritating as all get-out for poor Trey, and causes him to go on irrational forays into imaginary lands at the drop of a... well... hat. Trey would really enhance his looks were he to wear a top hat, but he'd have to forego the leaf shine that he spreads all over his face and scalp for very public appearances. Otherwise the hat would slide off the steep angles of his noggin.

Gowdy's only other option is to remove the gerbil and go full shaved-head bald. That way, he can blind audiences with reflected light from his chrome dome, given his already known propensity to apply Leaf Shine. It would cause a marvelous distraction for the press that would then begin characterizing Gowdy's quotes as "illuminating" and "bright". Everyone wins!