Funny: Hooters is closing locations, restrategizing because millennials aren't that into boobs.

[Nevernose]

57. 90% of high schoolers brain capacity is spent on boobs and weed

And that’s just the straight girls: the boys are even worse. I can’t imagine that any other generations woke up one day and said, “Golly! I no longer find bosoms appealing! Perhaps I shall dine at an alternative establishment...”

What I hope is happening is that the younger generation is no longer totally blatant and completely shameless about objectifying women (or men, for that matter). It’s one thing to find people and their parts attractive; it’s totally different to go out of one’s way to look at them. I seriously doubt porn has anything to do with it, as it was literally the first fine art created (on cave walls, by women, no less, because people have always enjoyed doing the dirty, even though they always seem to leave it out of the history books).

When I was younger I loved going to the nudie bars. I grew up in Vegas, so there’s a lot of nudie bars. The last few times I went were for other people’s bachelor parties. It was just kind of sad. Lots of lonely men paying pretty women to pretend to be their friend. Sit in the back of one of those places sometime and really watch the whole scene and not the naked ladies: it’s really kind of depressing.

The wings are actually pretty good, but I’ve only ever been to Hooters a few times, and that’s only because a former student is a waitress there and another is an assistant manager. Which sounds creepier than it is, I swear. My wife and I just get free food sometimes and catch up with former students.