Saw this on FB - difference between men and women when asked how they avoid sexual assault

[KitSileya]

44. It illustrates how different the world is for straight cis males vs everybody else.

It reminds me of the story told on an advice forum I frequent. The poster was relating an experience of her husband on a corporate workshop, where a young, beautiful, female colleague was pursued (harassed) by another male colleague. Poster's husband took up the position of buffer, escorting said female colleague and giving her some relief from awkward male colleague. He derailed several attempts A made to get Beautiful on her own. In the evening, after Poster's Husband and Beautiful had gone on a hike, for some reason P'sH hung back before going to his room, while B went to bed. On his way he discovered that A had cornered B outside her room at the end of the hallway. With the moment of distraction P'sH created, B managed to pop into her room and close and lock the door, and the workshop was over the day after.

How chivalrous of P'sH for helping B and providing her with a buffer, right? Poor A for being so awkward about girls, right? He shouldn't have been reported to the workshop manager for not being able to talk to a beautiful woman, amirite? But the QUESTION, which most women spot immediately, and most men do not, shows how differently we traverse this world. Why was A waiting for her outside her room at night?

Other important questions raised by this story are why was A's participation in the workshop considered more important than B's? Why was P'sH first instinct not to get A thrown out of the workshop for inappropriate behavior, but rather, as a 'safe' married man, to shadow B pretty much everywhere? Why was there an automatic assumption that A must have good intentions, and was only awkward instead of actively harassing B? Because that is what he was doing. Actively harassing B. And everyone gave him the benefit of the doubt (he must be awkward around women) instead of shutting it down when they were amply aware that the attention A gave B was unwanted. Why should the awkward men of the world get to hit on women again and again, instead of being told - "if you cannot learn body language, YOU need to learn when it is appropriate to flirt with women, and then you only get to ask her directly whether she is interested, and you MUST interpret anything other than an enthusiastic YES as a no and back the fuck off!' Otherwise other guys will police you and not leave that job up to the women.