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overleft

(404 posts)

36. you are doing the right thing.

Reply to Oak2004 (Original post)

Sat Jan 9, 2021, 06:55 PM

Jan 2021

Sometimes the tough love is the best love. It may save his life.

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This is becoming one of the hardest things I have ever done [View all] Oak2004 Jan 2021 OP

Tough call, I wonder if this goes further if his "friends" from the bar have him do worse? dem4decades Jan 2021 #1

Oh man, that is brutal intrepidity Jan 2021 #2

IMO, you are probably saving your brother's life. blm Jan 2021 #3

Exactly. Mr.Bill Jan 2021 #7

Not only that, but you just might be supplying the dose of reality which he needs groundloop Jan 2021 #13

Yes. 1st law of physics stollen Jan 2021 #85

+ agree. had same experience with a brother of mine wrt drug addiction. nt iluvtennis Jan 2021 #101

Agreed. Tough to do, but in the long run it needs to happen. (nt) Paladin Jan 2021 #35

To his "friends" he is cannon fodder. A bullet-stopper to be put in the front line. HubertHeaver Jan 2021 #71

Agreed johnnyplankton Jan 2021 #75

+1 Lokee11 Jan 2021 #79

Agreed. It is better that he be arrested now than shot next time. TomSlick Jan 2021 #109

I have done that. But for a lower level crime. SharonAnn Jan 2021 #117

Agree. volstork Jan 2021 #118

+1000s DinahMoeHum Jan 2021 #132

Sending you 💖💖💕💕 MLAA Jan 2021 #4

I cannot imagine how painful this is for you leftieNanner Jan 2021 #5

As hard as it is-- it's the best thing to do all around. johnp3907 Jan 2021 #6

Alcoholics Anonymous refers to it as "hitting bottom." LastLiberal in PalmSprings Jan 2021 #41

Not MY brother. johnp3907 Jan 2021 #65

You have my sympathy. LastLiberal in PalmSprings Jan 2021 #86

This message was self-deleted by its author Chin music Jan 2021 #8

good comment. Agree. Lost my brother to Fox years ago, but this is another level. Terrorism. nt Evolve Dammit Jan 2021 #60

IMO Fox is complicit. JudyM Jan 2021 #103

Fox is not just complicit, it's causative. BComplex Jan 2021 #136

Also, evangelical ministers and churches as well. KPN Jan 2021 #152

Horrible. JudyM Jan 2021 #157

In my prayers. I admire your courage RealityCheque Jan 2021 #9

Sadly DownriverDem Jan 2021 #10

That is some tough love right there soothsayer Jan 2021 #11

That is not tough love. I have a brother who served time...and prisons or horrible places. Demsrule86 Jan 2021 #24

Well it's tough... and it's love soothsayer Jan 2021 #28

I don't think destroying any chance of a decent life your brother has is love of any sort. It would Demsrule86 Jan 2021 #53

agreed. People harden in prison, and experience horrors there. Grasswire2 Jan 2021 #128

Wouldn't it depend on what his participation was? wnylib Jan 2021 #129

So you would sell all of us down the river soldierant Jan 2021 #131

I don't know the situation, and I would suspect that you don't either. If the posters brother's IsItJustMe Jan 2021 #134

My niece was even denied medical care because she did not have the money to pay for it This was for Oppaloopa Jan 2021 #148

Maybe he will kill or get killed in the next rally?!? LakeArenal Jan 2021 #54

I have a brother who went to prison...it is more likely, he dies in prison. My brother was in Demsrule86 Jan 2021 #58

As someone who has read 13,000 letters from prisoners to me... Grasswire2 Jan 2021 #125

he probably would not get prison time Oak2004 Jan 2021 #139

I know what its like to have someone you love marlakay Jan 2021 #144

If that is true True Blue American Jan 2021 #146

This answers your question. You just have to be strong. Turning him in is the right thing to do. GoneOffShore Jan 2021 #150

I agree, I would give him the choice of rehab or prison. Oppaloopa Jan 2021 #147

You should do it, and make sure that you mention... Buckeye_Democrat Jan 2021 #12

Damn, my heart hurts, hang in there n/t hibbing Jan 2021 #14

I'm so sorry. I have a brother like that. I scanned the pictures expecting to see his face. SunSeeker Jan 2021 #15

Me too, all of this stopwastingmymoney Jan 2021 #137

I would never turn in my brother. I wouldn't do it. Demsrule86 Jan 2021 #16

My parents arrived at the police station and... Buckeye_Democrat Jan 2021 #66

I wouldn't do it. He's not really a violent anarchist. Tell him what you know. Get a solemn vow that Karadeniz Jan 2021 #70

Was he actually involved with breaking into the Capital? GulfCoast66 Jan 2021 #17

You're doing him a massive favor. meadowlander Jan 2021 #18

I'm sorry, that is a tough position to be in... Try to remember that there is very likely to be a RockRaven Jan 2021 #19

I'm sorry you have to go through this but his actions have put you into this position. nt chowder66 Jan 2021 #20

That sucks man. denbot Jan 2021 #21

Wow! Jay25 Jan 2021 #22

Is it possible he won't know the tip came from you? You need to do the right thing. sinkingfeeling Jan 2021 #23

Could you warn him not to go or would that put you/fam in danger? OhNo-Really Jan 2021 #25

I doubt you are the only one in this spot birdographer Jan 2021 #26

I have no idea what I would do... Mazeltov Cocktail Jan 2021 #27

feel the same sympathy for the next group of people they decide to hurt TomDaisy Jan 2021 #29

Understand you. Perhaps someone else might recognize him too and send a tip if you ask Bernardo de La Paz Jan 2021 #30

Yes, terribly painful lillypaddle Jan 2021 #31

hard place and a rock stillcool Jan 2021 #32

You never did tell us... AmyStrange Jan 2021 #33

I'm so sorry that had to happen. ananda Jan 2021 #34

you are doing the right thing. overleft Jan 2021 #36

I'm sorry BainsBane Jan 2021 #37

Consult your soul cp Jan 2021 #38

Be strong. Do it. If you don't and he goes to some further terrorist event, PatrickforO Jan 2021 #39

I agree Traildogbob Jan 2021 #57

What you are doing is AN ACT OF LOVE. You may save his life Maru Kitteh Jan 2021 #40

By posting here, the decision has already been made in my opinion. Lakerstan Jan 2021 #42

Better some tough love from you now then years of regret Tommymac Jan 2021 #43

Strength. barbtries Jan 2021 #44

I'm sad that these terrorists have put their families in this position Cozmo Jan 2021 #45

What a terrible dilemma! BobTheSubgenius Jan 2021 #46

I know you're making a difficult decision. I've been in your shoes. littlemissmartypants Jan 2021 #47

Wow, that is a tough situation for you. If he is planning to be involved with more Marie Marie Jan 2021 #48

I would turn in anyone who turned against this country. Dem2theMax Jan 2021 #49

Remember David Kaczynski obamanut2012 Jan 2021 #50

Turning him in tiredtoo Jan 2021 #51

It's hard, but... Happy Hoosier Jan 2021 #52

All I can do send vibes for the best possible outcome for all concerned. Cannot imagine what niyad Jan 2021 #55

You're doing the right thing. Flaleftist Jan 2021 #56

I had to turn a family member in once gypsy11 Jan 2021 #59

I am so sorry. You could be saving multiple lives though, including his. nolabear Jan 2021 #61

I honestly don't know what I'd do mountain grammy Jan 2021 #62

You may be saving his life Wicked Blue Jan 2021 #63

Even Ted Kaczynski's brother suffered through this decision. Delmette2.0 Jan 2021 #64

That's got to be tough Catherine Vincent Jan 2021 #67

think of it as tough love..he may be killed next time. samnsara Jan 2021 #68

Hard, yes , correct moral choice? Yes sanatanadharma Jan 2021 #69

You might well be saving his life The Mouth Jan 2021 #72

This one hits close to home Jarqui Jan 2021 #73

If your brother has a substance abuse problem blueinredohio Jan 2021 #74

Hearts heal, guilt of not turning him in would stay w you forever. NoMoreRepugs Jan 2021 #76

You're doing the right thing... bluecollar2 Jan 2021 #77

Doing the right thing is the hardest thing to do sometimes TexasBushwhacker Jan 2021 #78

I'm sorry. I will keep strengthening thoughts for you and your bro. onecaliberal Jan 2021 #80

Ask yourself a simple question speaknow Jan 2021 #81

What you are doing is called "tough love". pazzyanne Jan 2021 #82

A relative of mine was at the rally Wednesday. They plastered pictures of their accommodations on shrike3 Jan 2021 #83

You have no choice. roamer65 Jan 2021 #84

Maybe he can work as their infiltrator and let Ilsa Jan 2021 #87

You don't have to Hav Jan 2021 #88

If he's in jail, he won't get injured or killed in an insurrection. vlyons Jan 2021 #89

Did you see him in the building? Renew Deal Jan 2021 #90

My heart goes out to you Frances Jan 2021 #91

I do not envy you kpete Jan 2021 #92

I have literally driven someone to the police gldstwmn Jan 2021 #93

Dear Oak2004, we are very sorry, and elleng Jan 2021 #94

You're doing the right thing. Your brother is an extremely dangerous person who... Lucky Luciano Jan 2021 #95

Talk to him about turning himself in before someone else EnterwebsJohn Jan 2021 #96

I am sorry rustysgurl Jan 2021 #97

This has to stop. It can stop now; it can stop later with more tragic consequences. It's up to you. NBachers Jan 2021 #98

I turned in... 2naSalit Jan 2021 #99

❤️✿❧🌿❧✿❤️ Lucinda Jan 2021 #100

It's such a personal choice. I don't know what I would do if faced with Politicub Jan 2021 #102

There are no good choices here SpankMe Jan 2021 #104

Not easy, but send it. Old Crow Jan 2021 #105

Hate to give advice but..... CommonHumanity Jan 2021 #106

I concur with this plan. First try a family intervention and get appalachiablue Jan 2021 #116

I agree with this NJCher Jan 2021 #149

Oak2004.... Upthevibe Jan 2021 #107

Omgosh. My heart breaks for you. I read an article about white supremacist groups Vivienne235729 Jan 2021 #108

They got their civil war. I'm sorry your brother was their cannon fodder. plimsoll Jan 2021 #110

The Gift of Desperation magicksmom Jan 2021 #111

Welcome to DU wryter2000 Jan 2021 #166

I am so sorry. BadgerMom Jan 2021 #112

Hugs, man. Tom Yossarian Joad Jan 2021 #113

I hope the feds round your brother up early and prevent him from doing it FakeNoose Jan 2021 #114

I wouldn't do it. JohnnyRingo Jan 2021 #115

disagree with "you'll never be sorry if you don't." that is not a "for certain" orleans Jan 2021 #135

Turning him in offers no promise of reform. JohnnyRingo Jan 2021 #140

I am nobody you know but all I can suggest is tough love you are doing this hard thing to not only PA_jen Jan 2021 #119

I have a grandson with a drug habit. appleannie1 Jan 2021 #120

Sometimes a person has to hit bottom to find the way up. TigressDem Jan 2021 #121

Are you sure he is guilty of a crime? lostnfound Jan 2021 #122

Yes--just being present at the scene wasn't a crime. BusyBeingBest Jan 2021 #127

merely being on the capitol grounds is indeed a crime Oak2004 Jan 2021 #143

I am so sorry ... UpInArms Jan 2021 #123

I'm sorry Oak2004 MustLoveBeagles Jan 2021 #124

Do this now, before his friends convince him to do something terrible - where there is no recovery. Dan Jan 2021 #126

There were thousands there. Turbineguy Jan 2021 #130

his involvement was minimal but he is planning to do more Oak2004 Jan 2021 #141

Jail/prison is one thing. If he plans to revisit D.C. on 1/20, the danger is physical harm. 3Hotdogs Jan 2021 #151

My brother got involved with some guys who were gun humping nuts. 58Sunliner Jan 2021 #133

I think you are doing the right thing captain queeg Jan 2021 #138

Sorry that your brother has put you in this position. nt Progressive Jones Jan 2021 #142

How deeply painful this is Oak2004. I read all... electric_blue68 Jan 2021 #145

If you don't turn him in you are aiding and abetting Generic Brad Jan 2021 #153

If you can get someone else to do, please do. mercuryblues Jan 2021 #154

Oh I feel your pain coeur_de_lion Jan 2021 #155

Like every other intervention, it's an act of love The Blue Flower Jan 2021 #156

I'm sorry, but how else to protect him? Attitudes shift Hortensis Jan 2021 #158

You can report him anonamously. CousinIT Jan 2021 #159

My heart goes out to you. sellitman Jan 2021 #160

I'm very sorry mzmolly Jan 2021 #161

Man! llashram Jan 2021 #162

I'm so very sorry you've had this gut-wrench decision to make. citizen blues Jan 2021 #163

You are trying to save his life Fresh_Start Jan 2021 #164

You're doing the right thing wryter2000 Jan 2021 #165

You are doing the right thing. Thank you! StarryNite Jan 2021 #167

Very tough situation .... jb5150 Jan 2021 #168

Oh, MAN... calimary Jan 2021 #169

NYT reaching out EzraMarcus Jan 2021 #170

This message was self-deleted by its author nam78_two Jan 2021 #172

This message was self-deleted by its author nam78_two Jan 2021 #171