NEED HELP & ADVICE...PLEASE!

[OneGrassRoot]

7. I had colon cancer, discovered in the ER...

with emergency surgery. I didn't have total blockage, and thus it had not perforated the colon, but I had one positive lymph node. I had been very sick for quite some time; I'm shocked your wife didn't have symptoms before the night of unbearable back pain.

I am so very, very sorry for what you're both going through.

I learned a lot about cancer very quickly. I learned that each type of cancer is different, and thus each type of cancer has its own "cocktail" -- and every single person reacts differently.

You're going to find that the chemo for colon cancer is platinum based and has some really bizarre side effects. Unless something has changed in the last three years, the most bizarre side effect of the platinum-based chemo is that if exposed to cold temps, it feels like touching an electric fence. You have to wear gloves and a scarf over your mouth to open the fridge or freezer; if cold air hits your mouth, you'll feel like you're suffocating even though you aren't.

I wish I could offer suggestions. Everyone is so different. I preferred to go it alone; I prefer to be isolated when not well. It was really, really rough, I'll be honest. Hopefully your relationship is such that she will be completely honest about what she needs -- and she won't know until she's in the midst of it, and it may change by the hour. Patience is required on your part.

Surely they'll have a consult to prepare you both and tell you what to have on hand in case of various side effects. I had low-grade nausea but not outright vomiting. I had a gnarly purple torso rash, of course no energy whatsoever, and other things I can't even remember now.

I had a recurrence -- one lesion on the liver -- a year ago July. It was successfully removed. They do close surveillance, so they can catch things quickly once you have this horrific diagnosis. I had oral chemo this time and it was much better, without the really bizarre platinum side effects. Bad, but much better.

But, amazingly, you get through to the other side. You're both in the midst of the nightmare/shock stage. I hope your caregivers are as wonderful as mine were. I had not been to a doctor in over 15 years as I had no health insurance after my divorce. Fortunately, I got ACA coverage the same year I got to the point I couldn't function and finally went to the ER.

But every single person involved in my care has been amazing. Truly amazing, lessening the impact of the nightmare. Please feel free to message me - for any reason.

I'll be thinking of you both.