Pillow Man vows to drop pillows from helicopters onto Canada's terror truckers. What could go wrong?
Aldous J Pennyfarthing for Community Contributors Team
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Thursday February 17, 2022 · 1:40 PM EST
Someone needs to crack open Mike Lindell’s head and replace the piñata candy already. It’s obviously gone bad.
The latest from Fascista Ned Flanders may have you scratching your head until you scrape brain: The Mewling Mustache of Minnesota wants to help those scofflaw Canadian truckers who are deliberately screwing with the economy of multiple nations in order to fight for their right to die with no dignity—and for no discernible reason. And how can Lindell help? Well, he can give them pillows, of course! Because he already has them, and ever since he tried to literally end America, roughly two-thirds of the country would rather snort a gonorrheal lungfish through a coke straw than sleep on one of his filthy foam sacks.
So I know Lindell isn’t exactly smart, or lucid, or even completely aware of his surroundings, but I anticipate a few glitches.
Assuming this “pillow drop” isn’t a joke (and I’ve watched enough of Pillow Man’s barmy hijinks to assume he’s serious), I’m not sure why he thinks he can bypass customs just by flying his pillows over the border in a helicopter. Though I do appreciate the unintentional and belated acknowledgement that Donald Trump’s southern border wall would have been completely useless—you can apparently just stuff pillowcases with heroin and drop them down your customers’ chimneys.
That said, Lindell may want to try this out with drones first, just in case Canada feels threatened enough to start shooting these gyroplanes down.
But with the supply chain the way it is, where exactly is Lindell going to source those “little parachutes”? Will he need to buy thousands of GI Joe Ultimate Army Paratrooper action figures from Sears and shove an equal number of shitty pillows into their tiny plastic arms?
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https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2022/2/17/2080845/-Pillow-Man-vows-to-drop-pillows-from-helicopters-onto-Canada-s-terror-truckers-What-could-go-wrong
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