MAGA: Tearing apart families since 2015 (and even earlier than that) [View all]

[IngridsLittleAngel]

I'd like to share a story about the impact that MAGA and "the great uniter" Tronald Drumpf, and the continuing impact he has had upon my family (or should that now be in quotes - "family"?) This involves a phone conversation with my dad yesterday afternoon. And do bear with me - we're going to be bouncing around the timeline a bit here and there for maximum effect.

While I'm in California, both my dad and my sister relocated to Texas at various points - her in the early 90's, him around 2000.

In 2020, my sister (who I have not spoken to in close to 20 years) wound up getting involved with a new boyfriend after divorce #2. He's ex-military, has a number of assault rifles, and is hardcore MAGA. My dad, who has despised Drumpf since the 70's and is deeply bothered by all the shootings in this country, wasn't exactly thrilled. Not that he can do a thing with her now in her 40's but he had concerns then of how this might affect her political leanings - especially with the 2020 election approaching.

He of course voted for Joe Biden and basically went straight D right on down the ballot. That is of no surprise. Since 2015, we've had many phone conversations where we discussed our disgust, anger, and horror at Drumpf and MAGA. He obviously has no use for Cancun Cruz, Abbutt, Gohmert, Cornyn or any of the RNJW's he gets to see up close and personally.

On the day of the election, he had a phone conversation with my sister. He asked her "Did you vote?" Yes. "I'm curious who you voted for..." Her answer was - I kid you not - "I don't know." You don't know who you voted for? C'mon... You know exactly who you voted for. You just don't want to say it.

So, I told him flat-out "She voted for Drumpf and is too chicken to say it because she doesn't want to hear your reaction."

Let's fast forward to Father's Day 2022. I called him. We had a nice conversation, along with discussing the US Open and its final round. After the tournament was over, he went out for a walk and she decided to call him.

The conversation started harmless enough - "Happy Father's Day" and all that. It quickly turned into ranting and raving about how "Joe" is screwing up the economy and "Joe" is behind the gas prices and "All the shootings are 'Joe's' fault" and "Joe" caused the war in Ukraine to happen. Everything she could think of to gripe about was "Joe's" fault. And, yes. That was how she repeatedly referred to President Biden... "Joe".

She then shifted gears to how "President Drumpf" made everything great and none of this would be happening with "President Drumpf" in the White House, how "President Drumpf" is the true president, "Joe" stole the election, "President Drumpf" is "the greatest president of my lifetime." I'm shocked she didn't say "ever" myself. But, yes. "Joe" Biden making everything bad, "President Drumpf" making things great.

Shocked, angry and disgusted, all he could do was ask her "Is this really what you think?" When she said "It's the truth," he said "I'm done with this conversation" and hung up on her. He's been upset for 2 days since then, has no idea if or when he can bring himself to talk to herself again, wonders if she's a "lost cause" to the propaganda and can't believe his own child actually supports Drumpf and MAGA and the QOP, especially during a time like this.

It was at this time that I had to take him back to 1991. I wasn't thrilled doing so but there were things I think he finally had to hear. I would sometimes leave and spend the weekend with a friend - mostly to get the hell away from her. More than a few times, she and her drug-addled no-good friends would break into my room to steal things, or deface my property. Yes, break in, despite me having a lock on the door.

For a number of years, my grandparents would get a new copy of the World Almanac every year. They would then give me the old ones. So I had 4 or 5 of them on my bookshelf. So I come back one weekend and it was obvious that her and her pack of goons had once again broken into my room. I surveyed everything, trying to figure out what they might've stolen, what they might've fucked up, you name it. That's when I notice that someone had gone through the bookshelf - namely, those almanacs.

Imagine my horror at thumbing through them. Page after page, defaced with "88", "1488", "Heil Hitler", swastikas, "KKK!", slurs for blacks, slurs for Jews, slurs for gays. I'm guessing they honestly set there for hours with a pen, writing all that hatred inside of them.

I never said a word. Why bother? Would he have believed me? Would he have cared? I won't lie - at the time, it felt like she could get away with anything (which she did, until the night she took his car for a joyride and wrecked it) and I was the scapegoat for the tension around the home.

Well, I finally told him about the bigotry written in my almanacs and said "I hate to say it, but she's always been MAGA. This is who she is. This is who she has always been. She's racist and bigoted and has been for a long time. Her friends were racist and bigoted. Her asshole first husband, who was one of her goon friends back then, is racist and bigoted. So, yes. She voted for Drumpf in 2016. She voted for Drumpf in 2020. She hasn't changed and never will. The only difference is now she 'doesn't have to be afraid anymore!' Where 30 years ago, she thought she was so cute and funny and sly, now she's open about it."

I wanted to go further. I still don't know how to address my gender identity and transitioning with him. But I wanted to tell him how she turned the entire family against me by telling every one of them how her "f***** 'brother' wants a sex change" in the 90's. I mean, he obviously has to know. I just don't know how to handle that right now...

Long story short: MAGA has strained, if not fractured, things between my dad and my "sister." I'm willing to listen to him vent and be a sounding board. But it's up to them whether they can or will have a relationship again, despite this chasm.

I want nothing to do with her cruelty or bigotry. I didn't 20 years ago, I don't now. I told him under no circumstances will I have anything to do with her again. Why would I? Between the hate in her heart, the hate in her boyfriend's heart, and their sick beliefs, I really do think one (or both) of them would shoot me themselves if they could. She hated me enough in the 90's. I have to imagine 7 years of MAGA and the QOP's Year of Trans Hate has only made that worse.

I don't miss her. To hell with her. A large chunk of my mental issues and PTSD are thanks to her.

I feel for my dad, though. About to turn 76, in poor health, and now has to go through with this. I just hope he can find peace with whatever he decides to do where she's concerned.

If their relationship is broken beyond repair? That's now 3 relatives and 2 dear friends he's lost since 2016, thanks to MAGA and "the great uniter."