General Discussion

zabet

(6,793 posts)

112. My kids

Tue Nov 27, 2012, 07:30 AM

Nov 2012

Figured it on their own around the 6 to 7 yr old range.

As far as it goes about parents lying to their kids and doing them irreparable psychological and/or emotional harm---I do not buy into that line of thought. So many people self-righteously say 'I don't lie to my kids about SC' when in their real day-to-day lives lie to their kids about a multitude of inane thiings....a lie is a lie ya know.

When I was a kid, from a rather large family......figuring it out was sort of a rite of passage for us as kids. We felt like we were in on a big adult secret that the 'little kids' didn't know about. All of my siblings and I took great joy in being able to help 'play santa' for the younger children once we were 'enlightened'. We were also taught that Christmas was about giving not receiving and that the monetary value of a gift was irrelevant, that what matters is the thought put into the gift that counts and is priceless.

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What age did you tell your kids there was no Santi Claus? [View all] NNN0LHI Nov 2012 OP

4...they figured out "God" on their own by 12. RagAss Nov 2012 #1

Yep, mine on day one, wasn't about to have to explain Lionessa Nov 2012 #53

Nobody ever really told us Populist_Prole Nov 2012 #2

Never told my kids. RebelOne Nov 2012 #13

My mother did the same thing. And no one told us either. I probably stopped believing valerief Nov 2012 #50

We still do from "Santa" gifts in my family and I am 27. n/t Agschmid Nov 2012 #145

I still do that! Freddie Nov 2012 #154

I was about 6 or 7. LeftofObama Nov 2012 #3

Right after the heard it on the school bus newfie11 Nov 2012 #4

they tell you elfin Nov 2012 #5

My parents never told me there was a Santa, but I always got a gift or two from "Santa" FSogol Nov 2012 #6

I still give gifts from Santa to my whole family. Believing is fun. Bucky Nov 2012 #9

Please don't ruin it for them. I was 9 yrs old and was devasted when I found out. southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #7

Please explain to me the value of EVER lying to children. Lionessa Nov 2012 #55

That's a tacky and personal attack "sucks to be you". She was talking about Christmas and an elf, txwhitedove Nov 2012 #62

Thank you. You got what I was trying to say. I also hope never to lose that child southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #67

Yes, but those stories didn't have adults then pretending they were true Lionessa Nov 2012 #84

Say what? Animals can't talk? Since when? Just a guess, there's no heaven either and dogs don't txwhitedove Nov 2012 #89

Thank you marions ghost Nov 2012 #114

And my grown children pecwae Nov 2012 #158

People survive lying and deception all the time, it doesn't make it moral or right. Lionessa Nov 2012 #162

You've got to be kidding. pecwae Nov 2012 #166

"Letting"?? Folks don't "let," they actively participate in lies and deception, there's Lionessa Nov 2012 #168

I feel sorry for you if you have to ask me that question. southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #65

I feel sorry that you're so hung up on needing a lie Lionessa Nov 2012 #85

I learned the hard way. My oldest girl was furious we'd lied to her @ it. riderinthestorm Nov 2012 #71

I totally understand her anger. I think things can be explained without lying so why Lionessa Nov 2012 #86

Not feeling the holiday spirit? Bucky Nov 2012 #91

I already responded to this aspect in other posts. Lionessa Nov 2012 #100

ITA about the value of lying to children. I finally figured it out at maybe 9. I felt betrayed raccoon Nov 2012 #125

Well particularly when, with a tad bit of actually thought, Lionessa Nov 2012 #126

You sound like a generally horrible person. DesMoinesDem Nov 2012 #130

People who lie to and deceive children are far worse, imo. Lionessa Nov 2012 #132

So you tell children that everyone is going to die and cease to exist forever? Orrex Nov 2012 #136

If and when it came up, absolutely, why lie about that either? Lionessa Nov 2012 #138

Again, go on with your bad self Orrex Nov 2012 #139

Lying is bad, truth is not. Get over your excuses for lying and deception. Lionessa Nov 2012 #140

So you answered none of the objections to your bullshit sermonizing? What are we to make of that? Orrex Nov 2012 #141

No matter how many individual issues you bring up, matters not, Lionessa Nov 2012 #144

So, you've got nothing except bullshit sermonizing Orrex Nov 2012 #146

Try as you might, the truth is not bullshit, lies are. Lionessa Nov 2012 #147

Thank you Orrex Nov 2012 #148

I think it sucks to be anyone who doesn't like to pretend sometimes, pnwmom Nov 2012 #151

This discussion is about lying, not pretending; when pretending the children Lionessa Nov 2012 #157

That's what you think, based on your not doing it. pnwmom Nov 2012 #163

My oldest girl was furious that we'd "lied" to her for so many yrs when we told her. riderinthestorm Nov 2012 #70

I had the very opposite reaction. I didn't want to know and when I found out I was upset. southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #74

I'm with you dflprincess Nov 2012 #80

Thank you. I don't want to lose that interchild that is still part of me. I guess southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #115

Usually when people "believe" what is proveablly false around here, Lionessa Nov 2012 #88

Man you are on some trip. Lighten up sweetie pie. We are talking about Santa Claus southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #116

I find lying to be the topic, Santa is only the catalyst to the topic. Lionessa Nov 2012 #121

If you were here I would play my violin for you. You really southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #123

You folks are really f'd up. I'm perfectly cheerful, I just don't need lies and deceit Lionessa Nov 2012 #124

I am not trying to change your mind. All I said was lighten up. Enjoy your holiday however southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #133

I don't find lying to and deceiving children as a topic to lighten up about. Lionessa Nov 2012 #134

Have a happy holiday anyway. I really don't care about this subject anymore. I'm not southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #135

"That said, I shall exit this topic." Go Vols Nov 2012 #164

+1 pecwae Nov 2012 #169

This message was self-deleted by its author txwhitedove Nov 2012 #96

When I was 7 years old I was hit by a car... one_voice Nov 2012 #94

What a nice story. Thank you for sharing. I bet it was just like yesterday to you. I am southernyankeebelle Nov 2012 #117

You were earlier than ordinary. Don't spoil their magical thinking. Bucky Nov 2012 #8

I found out on my own bigwillq Nov 2012 #10

My kids never did believe in Santa. frogmarch Nov 2012 #11

Hell, they eventually told us: "Umm ... Mom ... Dad, we know about Santa, but ... 11 Bravo Nov 2012 #12

SHUT UP! THERE IS TOO A SANTA CLAUSE! Squinch Nov 2012 #14

As a liberal Democrat, I keep on thinking Bobby's going to come back to us one day. Bucky Nov 2012 #20

One of my political heroes too Liberalynn Nov 2012 #75

The impossible logistics of it all is what did it to me Populist_Prole Nov 2012 #15

His magical powers and that bag replenisthes again and again... bkkyosemite Nov 2012 #104

I don't get it Tree-Hugger Nov 2012 #16

I didn't have to tell them. dchill Nov 2012 #17

Yes NNN0LHI; There is a Santa Claus handmade34 Nov 2012 #18

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. (How droll and wrong to say there is not.) Festivito Nov 2012 #108

I think it was around the 1st grade. Separation Nov 2012 #19

My niece found out from the kids at school at about 7 years old, but figured that her Squinch Nov 2012 #21

About 8 ann--- Nov 2012 #22

Kids are smart. longship Nov 2012 #23

I never told them there WAS a Santa Claus agracie Nov 2012 #24

I like that a lot! All the fun and none of the lies. Lucinda Nov 2012 #73

I don't have kids, but from the other side of things, I don't think we were ever told NYC Liberal Nov 2012 #25

What do mean, no Santa Clause? liberal N proud Nov 2012 #26

Raised in the Catholic tradition, I believe that saints have certain powers to summon miracles - hedgehog Nov 2012 #27

My grandkids mainstreetonce Nov 2012 #28

Sanity Clause? mysuzuki2 Nov 2012 #29

I already told my 3 yr old. nachosgrande Nov 2012 #30

we all pretended together iwillalwayswonderwhy Nov 2012 #31

Never. When my oldest went off to college and hinted for spending money, I told her to ask Santa. rug Nov 2012 #32

There's NO Santi Claus? tblue Nov 2012 #33

Never told them, they figured it out on their own. Little Star Nov 2012 #34

I let my children figure it out themselves. It gave them self confidence. They experienced Lint Head Nov 2012 #35

36 Turbineguy Nov 2012 #36

We kids knew before the parents let on anything. Coyotl Nov 2012 #37

Probably 2 or 3 karynnj Nov 2012 #38

I think it is okay for parents to play make believe with their children - but I think lying to them Douglas Carpenter Nov 2012 #39

+1000. nt raccoon Nov 2012 #131

I think my kids were too smart to believe the myth right from the start. Speck Tater Nov 2012 #40

are you saying there's no..... spanone Nov 2012 #41

I think I was about 30 when I told them tularetom Nov 2012 #42

Why would you tell them that? trof Nov 2012 #43

Everybody knows there ain't no Sanity Clause... PoliticAverse Nov 2012 #44

I helped my mum wrap the presents Skittles Nov 2012 #45

Older daughter about 6 HockeyMom Nov 2012 #46

I was 9 when my mom told me PennsylvaniaMatt Nov 2012 #47

Oh come on. It was a time honored sibling tradition to trash Santa by age 7. MichiganVote Nov 2012 #48

My kids are adults now and I still haven't told them. ornotna Nov 2012 #49

The first one - when she asked gollygee Nov 2012 #51

I wait until THEY told me and then I tell them I still believe in him because,,, benld74 Nov 2012 #52

I figured that out at 4, noticing that "Santa's" handwriting was the same as my mother's. David__77 Nov 2012 #54

I waited for them to tell me that there really was no Santa Trailrider1951 Nov 2012 #56

I didn't tell my kids. Other kids told them and I just verified when they asked Arkansas Granny Nov 2012 #57

i haven't. i think my 13 year old knows but plays along. my 8 year old ejpoeta Nov 2012 #58

and i am still trying to figure out how santa fits into christmas religiously speaking. ejpoeta Nov 2012 #59

My 7 and 8 year olds still believe but I think there are less and less kids among their friends that Jennicut Nov 2012 #60

What are you talking about? bluedigger Nov 2012 #61

I never told my kids, and they're all over 30. Should I tell them now? Nahhh. txwhitedove Nov 2012 #63

My daughter told me when she was 4... Contrary1 Nov 2012 #64

My daughter figured it out the same way Freddie Nov 2012 #156

WHAT??? x2 vancouverite Nov 2012 #66

My daughter demanded the truth Generic Brad Nov 2012 #68

I was 45 when I told them. n/t hootinholler Nov 2012 #69

!! Bucky Nov 2012 #92

My parents never told me there wasn't a Santa Claus, I just Raine Nov 2012 #72

Some other kid usually does the job for you BeyondGeography Nov 2012 #76

I think my oldest figured it out at about 5. GeorgeGist Nov 2012 #77

Please edit this post to put "spoiler" in the title (nt) Nye Bevan Nov 2012 #78

Whaddya mean there's NO SANTA ??!! WAHHHHH!!! Tigress DEM Nov 2012 #79

My daughter told me there was no Santa when she was nine Irishonly Nov 2012 #81

I recently told my son, "You can believe in Ilsa Nov 2012 #82

Wow. Tough audience. fugop Nov 2012 #83

HAHAHA! drthais Nov 2012 #87

I still haven't told them. Or about the Easter Bunny. Or the Tooth Fairy, for that matter. Stinky The Clown Nov 2012 #90

I knew something was up when the tooth fairy never appeared - I'm a light sleeper. So figuring RKP5637 Nov 2012 #93

I don't have kids (and there was much rejoicing) mythology Nov 2012 #95

Haha, explain choice of name "Mythology".... txwhitedove Nov 2012 #97

WHAT????? tavernier Nov 2012 #98

No kids... brooklynite Nov 2012 #99

I haven't yet laundry_queen Nov 2012 #101

My parents never told me there was one Arcanetrance Nov 2012 #102

My mother still believes in Santa and she is 84 nolabels Nov 2012 #103

I think my oldest was 8 when I told him. SheilaT Nov 2012 #105

I must have been in my mid 30's at the time jberryhill Nov 2012 #106

I'm really not sure. Lugnut Nov 2012 #107

There's no sanity clause. 6000eliot Nov 2012 #109

Got to admit I'd keep it going as long as I can. MichaelMcGuire Nov 2012 #110

We didn't have to DFW Nov 2012 #111

My kids zabet Nov 2012 #112

When they asked. nt LWolf Nov 2012 #113

We never used this myth with our child. JackRiddler Nov 2012 #118

When they saw 'Bambi Meets Godzilla' at age 7. randome Nov 2012 #119

i found out the hard way datasuspect Nov 2012 #120

I remember back in 2nd grade maybe, to my friend sakabatou Nov 2012 #122

We never pretended that there was one. nt patrice Nov 2012 #127

I had a probelm with the whole line of your post but I looked on Snopes and I guess you are right. slampoet Nov 2012 #128

My kids never believed in Santa Claus abelenkpe Nov 2012 #129

I always let them decide for themselves liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #137

I let my son learn on his own. Kids are smarter B Calm Nov 2012 #142

I've never told mine (15 and 12 this year)... LannyDeVaney Nov 2012 #143

My kid figured it out at 5 upi402 Nov 2012 #149

I bet the 9 year old's just playing along, pnwmom Nov 2012 #150

A school teacher told me when I was in 1st grade. nt Deep13 Nov 2012 #152

Never told my kids one way or the other...they figured it out on their own. n/t cynatnite Nov 2012 #153

I never told him there was one. LeftyMom Nov 2012 #155

Don't recall ever having that talk union_maid Nov 2012 #159

I neither encouraged or discouraged a belief in Santa Claus left is right Nov 2012 #160

Are you saying there is no Santa Claus? mmonk Nov 2012 #161

What?!? Nooo! Waaaaah! Zorra Nov 2012 #165

My kids told me when I was about 35. JoePhilly Nov 2012 #167