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[jollyreaper2112]

309. When you are raised in a culture where x is acceptable, how are you to know otherwise?

I think a lot of people are missing the point here. Men want to fuck women. Primal, hardwired urge. Fuck, steal, kill, the exercise of power. There are lots of things we want to do and those impulses have to be curbed by society to have any kind of civilization worthy of the name. But when society does not condemn the behavior but condones it, when you are either praised or excused for it, how exactly are you supposed to come by another way of thinking? It's easy to come by the right way of thinking when you're raised with it. When you aren't, it can take a lifetime to unlearn the bad lessons. How do you tell a Muslim kid martyrdom is a mug's game when the Palestinians take to it like Texans to football?

Quit thinking about how the behavior is wrong, start asking how someone can convince himself its not right when everyone is telling him otherwise. Because to pretend like these people are something inhuman and other and not like you means to miss how the cultures arise in the first place. Culture of corruption. The norms everyone else follows. Being one of the boys. If you want it you can have it. Consequences are for schmucks. Think of the ego boost of getting away with whatever you want to do. It's seductive as hell and completely intoxicating.

Why do you think good lads from good homes end up involved in war crimes? Working at stock brokerages? Becoming Republicans? Why do the regretful stories only come later? For some of these guys they have to burn out on the high-flying connected lifestyle and hit bottom before they can sober up and recognize what they were doing, come face to face with truth. Others maintain their success and are never bothered by a conscience. Some people have the moral strength to never succumb. They usually pay a hell of a price for it.

A little something that struck me my mom told me. She was the fat girl in school and had never gotten any attention from the boys. She got her first serious suitor in college, a really nice guy who did not stand up for himself, was groveling and completely subservient. She'd lost weight, grown her hair out and was getting attention. Only with the perspective of hindsight could she appreciate what she did to him in that relationship. She was a bitch and walked over him mercilessly, was as awful as any of the queen bitches from back in high school. He finally broke up with her and she realized he was damn right. The lesson she learned: because she had never had power, she had never learned restraint.

How socially aware would any of us be with different life experiences, if we were in a bubble of privilege and power?

When the wrong lessons are taught, how can we expect anything other than the wrong lessons getting taken to heart? When someone genuinely wants to come in from the cold and join the civilized people, what should our response be? "HI. I used to be a neo-nazi and have seen the error of my ways." You horrible racist! "Yeah, I was that. I'm trying to make amends." Racist! "So I realize stealing is wrong, I worked on Wall Street and did many terrible things." Thief! "Yeah, I'm admitting that." Brigand! "Is this really constructive?"