Since anyone with a penis is a potential rapist there is only but one (or two) answers:

[zazen]

132. six mos ago there was a high proportion of stuff about marriage equality

I'm straight, so what's it to me? After awhile I thought, sure I support it, and I'll try to keep an open mind, but since I have heterosexual privilege and don't have to struggle with this day in and day out, I have the luxury of not needing to read every one of them. It was clear to me that this is _my_ privilege, _my_ luxury, _my_ job to understand better what the LGBT community faces, and when frankly I'm all worn out keeping up, I just shut up and don't choose to follow the threads. I would never _presume_ to jump in and tell people struggling with that that they're giving DU a bad image by the number of threads they create.

That's my guess as to how a non-rape supporting male might feel. Sure you care. You want to do what you can. You realize you have the luxury sometimes to turn the issue off. Sometimes you succumb to systemic privilege--we all do--and ignore it. What is weird is diving in and arguing with the community discussing the reality of their issues.

That's what we don't get. Why do non-raping men take women's concerns about rape so personally?

It's not about you, except that we want your help to live in a world where gender violence decreases (hell, violence of all kind, but we're focusing on rape in this case). So, help us determine who's a risk and who isn't. Help us identify these perpetrators up front. Use your leadership with other men to get them to change their attitudes. Take your creative energy to help rather than dismiss us.

rant /off/