A terrible thought [View all]

[pat_k]

I keep having the thought "I hope he dies." I tell myself I really don't wish him dead. I know that Vance is as bad or worse. But the thought keeps coming up.

I think what is driving it is that seeing his face makes me sick to my stomach. Actually. Seriously.

I don't vomit when I see Vance. Angry? Disgusted? Sure. But nausea? No. At least not yet.

But almost 10 years of conditioning have left me unable to see that man's face without becoming physically ill and it will be f-ing hard to avoid. Then the thought comes back. I hope he dies soon. If only he would die.