General Discussion

harumph

(3,287 posts)

13. I would say, go if you agreed already... BUT rent a car or take Uber.

Mon Apr 14, 2025, 05:50 PM

Apr 2025

Just say you prefer to drive so you can run some errands afterward. Buy some flowers if you are able
for the dead cousin. Just make up something.

Moreover don't say anything other than pleasantries. If they start talking magagibberish and want you to join in,
excuse yourself. I've got clients that are MAGA and I have to bite my tongue when we meet. You're not
going to change anyone's mind so disabuse yourself of any fantasy like that. Likewise speaking up
in a righteous manner isn't even worth it. Pearls to swine. No specific disrespect intended - but it is
what it is.

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I've had a death in the family. I am in a little bit of a quandry. [View all] Coventina Apr 2025 OP

At the very least drive yourself so you can get the hell out of Dodge if you want to. Vinca Apr 2025 #1

I agree here. bluestarone Apr 2025 #17

Agreed SheltieLover Apr 2025 #24

Two words BonnieJW Apr 2025 #35

That does work! Stomach flu, "might have covid", woke up vomiting, you don't want to be around me. All good. Evolve Dammit Apr 2025 #49

drive yourself. Do not subject yourself to abuse WhiteTara Apr 2025 #2

Self-preservation ZDU Apr 2025 #3

Yes: first and foremost, protect yourself. WestMichRad Apr 2025 #51

I wouldnt go. Karadeniz Apr 2025 #4

A "sudden" illness or other life happening might suffice...Heck, all Maga lies to itself daily so what's the harm? wcmagumba Apr 2025 #5

Say you came down with Covid and can't make it. fierywoman Apr 2025 #19

I would try to find an excuse why you can't go. Emile Apr 2025 #6

Politics stops at the water's edge. Frasier Balzov Apr 2025 #7

IF you go, drive yourself. LoisB Apr 2025 #8

I agree, if she goes, she must drive herself. Irish_Dem Apr 2025 #22

That too. A sudden headache, a forgotten appointment, a stomach ache... LoisB Apr 2025 #26

Yes no need for drama, there can be a sudden headache, GI problems, etc. Irish_Dem Apr 2025 #34

Exactly. LoisB Apr 2025 #43

Yes no need to match the nasty energy. Irish_Dem Apr 2025 #44

My best advice is this, follow your instincts. William769 Apr 2025 #9

If you go, find a way if you can to be with a group of people you feel safe with. Girard442 Apr 2025 #10

I like the approach of a friend of mine. Memorize and use: "I don't feel comfortable..." hlthe2b Apr 2025 #11

And please don't say "I'm sorry but I don't feel comfortable." SheltieLover Apr 2025 #25

Based on what you are saying I think you shouldn't go JI7 Apr 2025 #12

I would say, go if you agreed already... BUT rent a car or take Uber. harumph Apr 2025 #13

I'm sorry for your loss, Coventina Niagara Apr 2025 #14

"This might sound horrible, but I just don't feel safe." CrispyQ Apr 2025 #15

Take a deep breath. Drive yourself so you can escape. Ignore everything the idiots allegorical oracle Apr 2025 #16

Put me down in the "don't go" camp. UniqueUserName Apr 2025 #18

If it was me I wouldn't go at all, but if you feel obligated, definitely drive yourself. Ocelot II Apr 2025 #20

I don't do weddings and funerals. nt leftyladyfrommo Apr 2025 #64

But this is about the OP, who apparently does sometimes, Ocelot II Apr 2025 #67

Absolutely drive yourself TommyT139 Apr 2025 #21

You have every right Bettie Apr 2025 #23

Feeling unsafe is the end of the conversation. Basso8vb Apr 2025 #27

You don't have to go.... FarPoint Apr 2025 #28

No advice, but just a virtual DU hug. yardwork Apr 2025 #29

Take care of yourself. If that means ChazII Apr 2025 #30

Go to the service. PennRalphie Apr 2025 #31

I wouldn't go. Why put yourself into a toxic situation. Say you're not feeling well and be safe TommieMommy Apr 2025 #32

If you carpool, do it with ONLY your brother. soldierant Apr 2025 #33

Recommended. H2O Man Apr 2025 #36

Oh dear, was that you I just heard sneezing? tavernier Apr 2025 #37

Suffering To Demonstrate That One Cares Is A Fools Gambit MayReasonRule Apr 2025 #38

Can you and your brother team up and travel together? n/t TygrBright Apr 2025 #39

Putting yourself in harms way, for what? stillcool Apr 2025 #40

I hear the flu is going around. If you don't want a confrontation, I'd suddenly come down with the flu a few days MLAA Apr 2025 #41

Send a card then enjoy your day doing exactly what you want. ❤️ littlemissmartypants Apr 2025 #42

Sorry in advance that you have the flu. Joinfortmill Apr 2025 #45

Well founded Cirsium Apr 2025 #46

Good luck. You'll be ok. Lot's of good advice here. mountain grammy Apr 2025 #47

We are here, and I'm sorry for your quandary. Your gut is telling you to not carpool and have freedom to leave if needed Evolve Dammit Apr 2025 #48

or just not go. Sorry for the add on Evolve Dammit Apr 2025 #50

Do not under any circumstances get stuck in a car with them. Say you'll drive alone... Hekate Apr 2025 #52

iIf they are violent, stay home. That has nothing to do with politics Warpy Apr 2025 #53

With just a few exceptions catchnrelease Apr 2025 #54

Drive yourself. ReRe Apr 2025 #55

Take care... Blue Ozarks Apr 2025 #56

Easy fix xuplate Apr 2025 #57

I've got a funeral for a MAGA cousin a couple of days ahead of yours. Ms. Toad Apr 2025 #58

Here's what I've done the last couple of times. Iggo Apr 2025 #59

You have an important DR appt 1st thing Monday morning mercuryblues Apr 2025 #60

🕯️🕊️💙🌈 I know what Cha Apr 2025 #61

Yes, drive yourself. viva la Apr 2025 #62

If you don't feel safe emotionally, do not go biophile Apr 2025 #63

There are, in my view, limits to what one must endure for family. NNadir Apr 2025 #65

If you Rebl2 Apr 2025 #66

Ask if there is a livestream option. IzzaNuDay Apr 2025 #68

I went to a funeral of a former colleague before the election progressoid Apr 2025 #69