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Quantess

(27,630 posts)

106. I knew you weren't.

Reply to ChisolmTrailDem (Reply #73)

Sat Mar 16, 2013, 09:04 PM

Mar 2013

Same as the OP. Good to hear that you admit to bad acting and pretend shock reaction.

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Wow, this whole debate of sexism topics, like door holding, makes me wonder if I was raised wrong... [View all] Logical Mar 2013 OP

you aren't doing anything wrong quinnox Mar 2013 #1

Based on what I have read here on DU, Vinnie From Indy Mar 2013 #2

I'm beginning to think jehop61 Mar 2013 #3

Definitely phony marions ghost Mar 2013 #22

This message was self-deleted by its author marions ghost Mar 2013 #35

Being polite and helpful to others--regardless of gender or age--is something we should all strive hlthe2b Mar 2013 #4

Yes, yes and yes, it's called being kind to one another. WHEN CRABS ROAR Mar 2013 #70

Amen.. I help whomever needs help SoCalDem Mar 2013 #78

Should women be given especially courteous treatment by men? LittleBlue Mar 2013 #5

The door bit is a red herring. I open as many doors for men as men open for me... It's 1monster Mar 2013 #57

I was well brought up same as you. dipsydoodle Mar 2013 #6

I'm with quinnox on that one Trajan Mar 2013 #7

" hypervigilance " says it all olddots Mar 2013 #20

I don't think you're doing anything wrong. Being polite is okay. dballance Mar 2013 #8

That's the way my parents raised me too. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #9

It hurts my heart to read this. abbeyco Mar 2013 #10

Apparently, the squeemish are incapable of saying "No, thanks" to someone performing a courtesy. Tierra_y_Libertad Mar 2013 #11

I think it's more of an academic issue than a real one. MineralMan Mar 2013 #12

Bingo! daleanime Mar 2013 #33

THIS! nt ben_thayer Mar 2013 #53

Benevolent sexism is often about power Pmc1962 Mar 2013 #56

For the bazzillionth time. It is not about common courtesy, it is about this: Luminous Animal Mar 2013 #13

I think you literally have posted that a bazillion times. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #24

You know, for someone who calls themselves "logical" Quantess Mar 2013 #14

This is an overblown stupid issue... NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #16

Institutionalized racism MattBaggins Mar 2013 #27

I don't know, Matt. Are you right? NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #29

Not true! Are you also a passive-aggressive DUer? Quantess Mar 2013 #43

Okay.... sibelian Mar 2013 #110

My parents are assholes... ChisolmTrailDem Mar 2013 #15

Are you "clutching your pearls"? Quantess Mar 2013 #17

What does "clutching your pearls" mean? Seriously. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #19

It's a reference to wealthy, prissy (maybe old?) ladies in old films / any films Quantess Mar 2013 #23

Got it. Thanks. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #30

Like so dipsydoodle Mar 2013 #31

That's great! NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #32

I wish I had a fainting couch! Quantess Mar 2013 #34

I got that from else where here when I googled for an image dipsydoodle Mar 2013 #37

I wasn't "clutching at my pearls", my comment is far from a good example of the definition. eom ChisolmTrailDem Mar 2013 #75

Huh? NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #76

Not serious at all. Sorry it wasn't obvious. eom ChisolmTrailDem Mar 2013 #73

I knew you weren't. Quantess Mar 2013 #106

I thought that a lot when I was a teenager... NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #18

Did your parents teach you to hold the door for other people or just women? MattBaggins Mar 2013 #28

Wasn't just my parents teaching that courtesy. Was every adult I ever came across. ChisolmTrailDem Mar 2013 #74

This entire subject centers around growth; change in societal mores and values... Melinda Mar 2013 #21

I made a similar comment in a similar thread justiceischeap Mar 2013 #119

Keep being polite. MyshkinCommaPrince Mar 2013 #25

and i know plenty of men who have never changed a tire fizzgig Mar 2013 #26

Men, here's the answer: marions ghost Mar 2013 #36

Men - except for me. Please ignore her when it comes to me. IdaBriggs Mar 2013 #112

Yes we all like help when it's appropriate marions ghost Mar 2013 #117

Just the latest outrage from the usual suspects RetroLounge Mar 2013 #38

For once I agree with you, grumpy cat! (no text) Quantess Mar 2013 #50

Yep. That would be all the DUers who started the stupid door opening OPs. Luminous Animal Mar 2013 #59

Actually, if you really look carefully, you might notice that there is no "latest" Warren DeMontague Mar 2013 #63

Oh, shit... I laughed kdmorris Mar 2013 #101

Don't give it another thought, you're doing the right thing tularetom Mar 2013 #39

We were ALL raised wrong. When people talk about "harmful social norms", that's the point. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #40

The problem is this; people assume they can read your mind and divine your motivations riqster Mar 2013 #41

As a woman, I will say that I don't mind any of these things kdmorris Mar 2013 #42

Tough for a man to know what to do, isn't it? You are a good man, Logical. Honeycombe8 Mar 2013 #44

Nicely stated (nt) The Straight Story Mar 2013 #45

Well put. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #47

A vignette chockablock with unexamined attitudes. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #55

I didn't make the rules. I just reported a fact. Honeycombe8 Mar 2013 #61

"No woman I know does any of these things." lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #83

Wow. There sure is a lot of outrage around here that not every woman wants to have doors opened Squinch Mar 2013 #46

they are all 'clucking' their pearls. Whisp Mar 2013 #72

You mean "clutching" their pearls? NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #87

I feel bad for them. They seem upset. Squinch Mar 2013 #99

Real chivalry marions ghost Mar 2013 #80

That is simply redecorating the pedestal. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #84

Huh? marions ghost Mar 2013 #89

There are differing opinions among women here. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #88

I expect so too marions ghost Mar 2013 #94

You're right. And yet, that doesn't seem to be happening. The poor things are beside themselves. Squinch Mar 2013 #100

I keep wondering why marions ghost Mar 2013 #109

It seems like a giant pout. I think there is a very wide swath of middle ground on both sides: Squinch Mar 2013 #114

Maybe we should give 'em some chivalry mugs and t-shirts? marions ghost Mar 2013 #116

How do we get jobs working at the urban dictionary? Wouldn't that be great? Squinch Mar 2013 #120

I'd love the job marions ghost Mar 2013 #122

How do you communicate to the would-be door opener that you don't want the door opened? Owl Mar 2013 #125

I don't. I open doors for men and for women. Men and women Squinch Mar 2013 #126

You're doing it right, as long as you don't think that's all you need to to treat women right. we can do it Mar 2013 #48

it's just the outrage trolls datasuspect Mar 2013 #49

I know! All these folks who are so outraged that some women don't want to have doors held for Squinch Mar 2013 #102

it must be exhausting sigmasix Mar 2013 #51

The feminists at DU aren't the ones creating manufactured outrage here gollygee Mar 2013 #58

a man asked for a definition of benevolent sexism. i gave a definition. and you interpret that as seabeyond Mar 2013 #81

As a woman, I'd like to say thank you.... madmom Mar 2013 #52

Hear. Hear. n/t littlemissmartypants Mar 2013 #68

works two ways homegirl Mar 2013 #54

"Good manners are the best status symbol." NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #71

You were raised sexist, but most of us were. ZombieHorde Mar 2013 #60

"I know many women have never changed a tire". Nye Bevan Mar 2013 #62

I know many haven't too. But I also know that many HAVE. So what? Why the outrage? Multiple Squinch Mar 2013 #104

I love being treated by having a "Gentleman" hold open a door or lend his hand when getting out of a Milliesmom Mar 2013 #64

Thank you for this. I hope most women feel like you do. That is the intent! n-t Logical Mar 2013 #77

Maybe the problem is... marions ghost Mar 2013 #79

I appreciate chivalry ecstatic Mar 2013 #65

Being respectful and caring is never wrong! proReality Mar 2013 #66

Are you married? Do you have a brother? I rec. you clone yourself ASAP! eom littlemissmartypants Mar 2013 #67

I would always offer to carry a heavy object for someone (man or woman) who would have a harder time dorkulon Mar 2013 #69

I always make sure to slam the door in their face... Ron Obvious Mar 2013 #82

Careful... NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #85

I feared as much... Ron Obvious Mar 2013 #86

When I was of dating age, I found the subject of car doors a little confusing aint_no_life_nowhere Mar 2013 #90

Opening the driver's side door for you from the inside was a very good sign (nt) Nye Bevan Mar 2013 #91

Don't you think that behavior kind of bizarre? marions ghost Mar 2013 #92

Well, it was some time ago, as I'm now 63 and I guess wasn't an old custom at the time aint_no_life_nowhere Mar 2013 #93

I understand that you might want to kowtow marions ghost Mar 2013 #96

I haven't dated in years and years, since my late 20s aint_no_life_nowhere Mar 2013 #97

You sound like you'd make a good diplomat marions ghost Mar 2013 #98

And you sound like someone whose bark is occasionally worse than her/his bite aint_no_life_nowhere Mar 2013 #103

Thanks & I'm sure marions ghost Mar 2013 #107

I see nothing sexist about any of what you stated malaise Mar 2013 #95

You aren't doing anything wrong Warpy Mar 2013 #105

No women here has made an issue about doors. BainsBane Mar 2013 #108

Actually, I think it was a woman who originally brought up the doors subject. NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #129

She gave it as an example BainsBane Mar 2013 #131

"Benevolent sexism would be holding the door open..." NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #132

Then discuss it theoretically BainsBane Mar 2013 #133

The whole "doors" concept was so ridiculous... NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #134

When no one objects to something BainsBane Mar 2013 #135

If that person considers it "benevolent sexism"... NaturalHigh Mar 2013 #136

Party in the Lounge marions ghost Mar 2013 #111

Reminds me of another example Lordquinton Mar 2013 #113

as a woman lost-in-nj Mar 2013 #115

You are doing nothing wrong. Just ignore the extremists in our society, they sabrina 1 Mar 2013 #118

except NO ONE here is offended. but, that really cannot be a part of your or the others story. seabeyond Mar 2013 #121

So I'm 'dishonest' because I express my opinion that women in general are sabrina 1 Mar 2013 #123

the dishonesty comes in stating women on du are outraged. i stated that clearly. no twisting and seabeyond Mar 2013 #124

Where did sabrina mention outrage? polly7 Mar 2013 #128

Not one feminist here has told anyone that they need to be offended about anyone Luminous Animal Mar 2013 #130

Your momma raised you right. If you did any of those things for me I would be greatful and I southernyankeebelle Mar 2013 #127

This manufactured outrage is ridiculous WhollyHeretic Mar 2013 #137

Post removed Post removed May 2013 #138