General Discussion

hedgehog

(36,286 posts)

36. I think this was an example of a special toxic office culture more than a homophobic one;

Sun Mar 17, 2013, 01:04 PM

Mar 2013

if you'd been the only black/Latino/asian/whatever in the office, you'd have been assigned that role. It's not just a female thing, either. The most toxic workplace I ever encountered was overwhelmingly male. Some people never leave junior high behind!

BTW - it's a good thing to sit down and think through (or write down!) what happened. Otherwise the poison stays with you and turns up to hurt you when you least expect it!

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46 replies

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"Benevolent homophobia". Or was it? Here's what happened... [View all] sibelian Mar 2013 OP

I loved reading this OKNancy Mar 2013 #1

Thank you. sibelian Mar 2013 #2

I read the OP 3 times, and I have to say: Raine1967 Mar 2013 #16

..."insensitivity can often be used confused with -ism or -phobia or -otry" sibelian Mar 2013 #32

I bet you feel Bay Boy Mar 2013 #3

Well, you don't have to read them if you don't want to... sibelian Mar 2013 #4

Well you took that the wrong way.. Bay Boy Mar 2013 #12

Ok then... sibelian Mar 2013 #15

I don't think they were homophobic. enlightenment Mar 2013 #5

Florence and I become pretty good pals. sibelian Mar 2013 #8

A Wonderful Account, Sir: Thank You For Sharing It The Magistrate Mar 2013 #6

Thank you! sibelian Mar 2013 #9

They may not have been malicious, but they seem incredibly misguided. nomorenomore08 Mar 2013 #7

Well, it wasn't entirely their fault. sibelian Mar 2013 #11

Ahh, the days of being "the gay" Prism Mar 2013 #10

"Prism, read this dirty story I wrote and tell me what you think!" sibelian Mar 2013 #13

"Sex and the City is a cancerous monstrosity." nomorenomore08 Mar 2013 #14

I think it was very insensitive. Kalidurga Mar 2013 #17

I know. And really, it was quite difficult to know what to do sibelian Mar 2013 #19

Lovely music... Kalidurga Mar 2013 #22

dunno. i take your point, but it's not really normal office talk to talk about someone's vagina or HiPointDem Mar 2013 #18

Well, ya know whut? sibelian Mar 2013 #24

i've never worked in an office where genitalia was a major topic of conversation. i can only HiPointDem Mar 2013 #26

Ugh. Insensitive and incredibly unprofessional magical thyme Mar 2013 #20

Gah! sibelian Mar 2013 #21

^^^^^ this ^^^^^^^ n/t NMDemDist2 Mar 2013 #23

You should dump your job(s) and become a writer BrotherIvan Mar 2013 #25

Nice idea... sibelian Mar 2013 #27

Maybe check out some blogs that take content from different writers BrotherIvan Mar 2013 #33

...hmmmmm sibelian Mar 2013 #44

Great read. Very illuminating. Thank you. nt Xipe Totec Mar 2013 #28

Most welcome! :) nt sibelian Mar 2013 #29

Ah, the obsession with inserting male organs into holes. Gravitycollapse Mar 2013 #30

Mmmmm, thank you I think sibelian Mar 2013 #31

"one of the exciting, gay TV people" toddaa Mar 2013 #34

"it was the "office gay" who wouldn't shut up with the sex jokes." - Arg! It just makes me cringe! sibelian Mar 2013 #37

It was a racist joke that got him escorted out of the building toddaa Mar 2013 #38

Good Lord... sibelian Mar 2013 #39

Don't feel any obligation toddaa Mar 2013 #41

Straight people's preoccupation with gay people's sex lives is mystifying Blaukraut Mar 2013 #35

I'm not usually that bothered by it. sibelian Mar 2013 #40

Straight people have preoccupation with other straight people's sex lives Major Nikon Mar 2013 #42

They certainly do... sibelian Mar 2013 #43

I think this was an example of a special toxic office culture more than a homophobic one; hedgehog Mar 2013 #36

As a gay man let me first say that I can relate to this- cecilfirefox Mar 2013 #45

Cheers! sibelian Mar 2013 #46