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58. I'm 70 & I'm tired. With the exception of 3 good friends, a nephew and a niece, virtually everyone

Mon May 20, 2013, 01:04 PM

May 2013

I have known & loved has passed. I have 4 cats, but 1 of them is the reason I keep going. Maybe I wouldn't tell anyone else but you this, but I live for that cat. When I retired I thought I'd volunteer for all kinds of things but found out most programs want you to start really early in the morning. I get up really early, but don't want "to go" anywhere. I'm also lazy, which I didn't know. I'm diabetic. I volunteered at an animal shelter cleaning up after bunnies because I knew I wouldn't be bringing bunnies home. One dwarf bunny bit the literal shit out of me so I had to stop even that because of my health situation - can't be being bit a lot. My 1 cat loves me better than he loves himself & I know that because I can see it in his adoring eyes. If living for 1 cat is how it ends, so be it. I have vowed to myself that I will give him as long a life as I can so that's what keeps me going. Ridiculous I know, but it is what it is. Peace.

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This message was self-deleted by its author [View all] Locut0s May 2013 OP

I have lived in my car zerosumgame0005 May 2013 #1

I've not lived on the street but have dealt with depression. Please stay positive. I can relate to Lint Head May 2013 #2

You are so, so right. defacto7 May 2013 #4

I have. defacto7 May 2013 #3

You can't fail at life....life is just something you do. Evoman May 2013 #5

... Mnemosyne May 2013 #7

I admire you and your will power! Hope I can be that brave when I have to face something like you Lint Head May 2013 #8

Wow, that was a lot to take in. Probably the wisest post I have ever seen. Live and Learn May 2013 #12

well said and i wish you well. when my husband DesertFlower May 2013 #13

Wow thank you. I feel ashamed to feel as bad as I do when... Locut0s May 2013 #15

... OneGrassRoot May 2013 #33

Quite a post! JNelson6563 May 2013 #21

+100 HiPointDem May 2013 #23

A very wise 33-year-old at that. OneGrassRoot May 2013 #32

Thank you all for your kind words. Evoman May 2013 #37

I wish you the best, and I will keep you in my thoughts. nt msanthrope May 2013 #69

It's good to see you here, Evoman. hunter May 2013 #39

>>> Nay May 2013 #43

Thank you for sharing that wisdom. Poll_Blind May 2013 #51

I really admire you for sharing that. closeupready May 2013 #60

Excellent advice. LuvNewcastle May 2013 #74

I lived in my van for a couple months in the mid 80's. bhikkhu May 2013 #6

Down by the river? pipoman May 2013 #9

Lived in my mini-pickup with canopy for 4 months. ErikJ May 2013 #10

i'm struggling with depression right now. DesertFlower May 2013 #11

... OneGrassRoot May 2013 #31

thank you. nt DesertFlower May 2013 #59

I'm 70 & I'm tired. With the exception of 3 good friends, a nephew and a niece, virtually everyone Booster May 2013 #58

my family is all gone too except for DesertFlower May 2013 #66

I feel so much better now. I don't feel so alone after reading your reply. I was beginning to Booster May 2013 #81

so sorry about your dog. DesertFlower May 2013 #85

Sending you love and warm thoughts from New York, DF! closeupready May 2013 #61

thank you so much. nt DesertFlower May 2013 #64

You deserve no such thing. Nobody "deserves" being homeless. Live and Learn May 2013 #14

My son struggles with depression and PTSD as well Zulan May 2013 #16

wonderful reply - very insightful tomm2thumbs May 2013 #20

Thank you!... Locut0s May 2013 #24

We're on a similar hamster wheel. *hugs* I think many of us who are mentally ill still GreenPartyVoter May 2013 #29

You are welcome Zulan May 2013 #47

Jeez, what a great mom DiverDave May 2013 #27

Hey man, I am the dad. Zulan May 2013 #48

My dad was a liar and pedophile and a user of people DiverDave May 2013 #67

wow... what a loser dad. Zulan May 2013 #79

George Orwell wrote a book about it in 1933 ucrdem May 2013 #17

Does the beginning of this seem at all familiar? Spitfire of ATJ May 2013 #18

just sharing, not endorsing tomm2thumbs May 2013 #19

Look at what you have done! JNelson6563 May 2013 #22

no one 'deserves' it. who is judging you but yourself? i seriously doubt your parents would HiPointDem May 2013 #25

Thank you. many people have recommended volunteer work... Locut0s May 2013 #26

'embarrassing messes' = everyone has them. make amends where you need to & move on. they HiPointDem May 2013 #28

As a parent, I can tell you I'm pretty sure they would. Ms. Toad May 2013 #30

Ive lived on the street. bunnies May 2013 #34

Wow... TeeYiYi May 2013 #45

Thanks Tee bunnies May 2013 #72

+1000 Sissyk May 2013 #46

I wish I oculd share your experiences with some of my uncaring hateful coworkers rustydog May 2013 #55

Thanks rusty.... bunnies May 2013 #71

+100 HiPointDem May 2013 #68

This message was self-deleted by its author kentuck May 2013 #35

Yep. H2O Man May 2013 #36

Don't live on the street. panader0 May 2013 #38

It didn't work for me. hunter May 2013 #40

Drugs? Alcohol? Junkdrawer May 2013 #41

"Living on the streets" is my mental backstop, and I may be flippant about it sometimes... hunter May 2013 #42

Can you get it treated somehow? Zulan May 2013 #49

Maybe I should have been clearer, I'm "treated" now More or less... hunter May 2013 #54

Yep. It is no fun. redqueen May 2013 #44

No, I haven't lived on the streets..but in over 30 years of hospital security rustydog May 2013 #50

Seriously? You *want* to live on the street? IdaBriggs May 2013 #52

"part of me really doesn't care it seems" ... I hope this helps: Shampoobra May 2013 #53

Wish I could rec your reply to the OP. n/t FSogol May 2013 #80

If it had not been for a very nice college professor, I would have been very close liberal N proud May 2013 #56

I feel you. Is there someone you can talk to? Dash87 May 2013 #57

I'm not unlike you Cal Carpenter May 2013 #62

I assume your universal healthcare covers mental illness KamaAina May 2013 #63

I went through a few years of depression, RebelOne May 2013 #65

Yep. 7 months. Iggo May 2013 #70

What would you like to know? Lady Freedom Returns May 2013 #73

I know it's hard to see right now, but you'd be better off to stay where you are justiceischeap May 2013 #75

If you feel yourself sliding NoOneMan May 2013 #76

I think you should read Ray Bradbury's "Zen In The Art Of Writing". CJCRANE May 2013 #77

Never lived on the street but I have had depression and self esteem issues my entire life. Jennicut May 2013 #78

I'm glad you are trying so hard! JNelson6563 May 2013 #84

I've never lived on the street ohheckyeah May 2013 #82

I have never lived on the street but my best friend had to when he lost his job... Jasana May 2013 #83