General Discussion

LittleBlue

(10,362 posts)

70. I'm more concerned with the older person's intent

Reply to ScreamingMeemie (Original post)

Sat May 25, 2013, 01:07 PM

May 2013

than the age in this case, in most cases actually. Let's say for the sake of argument that the older person is a male and the younger is my daughter. Was he cruising a high school looking to pick up a high school girl, or did they meet by chance? Is his intent exploitative or do they genuinely feel affection for one another? And most importantly, does he make her feel good about herself or bad?

These are the questions I use for determining "okay". Not legality, but "okay." My sister has dated some horrifically awful men her own age, one stole from her and one came to her work and threatened her, then stalked her. One held her dog as a sort of captive after she broke up with him. The age thing for me has always been insignificant compared to the truly important aspects of relationships like what each partner contributes, treatment, intent, and most importantly the character of their partner.

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For the sake of argument, is it okay for a 23 year old to have sex with a 16 year old? [View all] ScreamingMeemie May 2013 OP

age/2 +7 Rex May 2013 #1

60/2+7=37? uppityperson May 2013 #2

Not my cup of tea. Rex May 2013 #3

Mine either but whatever. uppityperson May 2013 #15

Just returning the favor Rex May 2013 #25

Could've just checked my math. Nt uppityperson May 2013 #27

You go girl! William769 May 2013 #34

Again, not OK, but should not be illegal. KamaAina May 2013 #4

See link I attached with poll (that's what this is in reference to) ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #7

Per police affidavit, the DOB is 8/14/94 and the victim is 14. magical thyme May 2013 #67

One can vote, drink, enlist, drive, enter into contracts, and is not subject to youth curfews. MADem May 2013 #5

What about in the olden days? Floyd_Gondolli May 2013 #13

Different times then, the "olden days". uppityperson May 2013 #17

Wow. Floyd_Gondolli May 2013 #20

Chartreuse uppityperson May 2013 #23

Cobalt Floyd_Gondolli May 2013 #24

So say we all MattBaggins May 2013 #51

In the olden days, women were often traded like cattle--which wasn't terribly MADem May 2013 #19

several hundred thousand years of human biology = predation. got it. nt galileoreloaded May 2013 #26

Have you ever studied the behavior of primate bands? Warren DeMontague May 2013 #29

this will be the rubicon for you and I, and will be fun galileoreloaded May 2013 #33

you think only people of limited intelligence don't like liars? Warren DeMontague May 2013 #36

in my consulting business galileoreloaded May 2013 #37

attempting to bait me isn't going to work. Warren DeMontague May 2013 #38

er, im not but ok. :) nt galileoreloaded May 2013 #40

I have no idea what you are trying to say. nt MADem May 2013 #44

Yes MattBaggins May 2013 #52

Depends on a state's age of consent rule... DonViejo May 2013 #6

I'm asking what you think about it. ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #8

And I responded, "Depends on a state's age of consent rule." nt DonViejo May 2013 #9

So you don't have a personal opinion. Okay. ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #11

If that's how you translate my response, by all means go for it.... DonViejo May 2013 #14

Not okay, but not illegal BainsBane May 2013 #10

Yep etherealtruth May 2013 #18

My own experience jehop61 May 2013 #12

These hypotheticals are useless without knowing the two participants. Gravitycollapse May 2013 #16

This is apparently legal in Florida... 23 and 16 year old CAN have sex davidn3600 May 2013 #21

Males are slow. kentuck May 2013 #22

My own experience -- I had sex with someone older than 23 when I was 16. gateley May 2013 #28

People get really irate but here is the breakdown MattBaggins May 2013 #53

what if the 23 year is the 16 year old's teacher or coach? onenote May 2013 #30

It also depends on what the parents want. randome May 2013 #31

Why not? MattBaggins May 2013 #56

Parents DO effectively own their children while they are still children. randome May 2013 #65

Maybe, for some it is more about perception than a strict morality.. Tikki May 2013 #32

My father was born in 1900, my mother 1935. William769 May 2013 #35

Can you do another poll too, about a 30 yr old with a 21 yr old? nt Electric Monk May 2013 #39

This was based on current laws. And how they stand in some states. Hide thread is your friend. nt. ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #42

It's legal in MA Marrah_G May 2013 #41

Most state's age of consent is under 18, I think. Although, I am not sure. morningfog May 2013 #49

IMO, once you get beyond about 4 years difference jeff47 May 2013 #43

I don't know. nt ZombieHorde May 2013 #45

I would wonder why would a 23 year old adult be interested in a 16 year old kid. n/t cynatnite May 2013 #46

As long as it is consensual, yes. Lots of 16 year olds have sex. morningfog May 2013 #47

And what if said 23 year old adult likes 'em young like that? n/t cynatnite May 2013 #48

If it was consensual, I would gather the 16 year old like them old like that. morningfog May 2013 #50

What about 21 and 13 year olds? cynatnite May 2013 #54

its really none of my business quinnox May 2013 #55

Why do you want to argue about this? nt LWolf May 2013 #57

Try to relax. It's a question. Not an argument. This case has raised some interesting and important ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #58

I am relaxed. LWolf May 2013 #66

I'm 52. My Wife is 64 next month. cherokeeprogressive May 2013 #59

How did we jump from a 4 year difference to a 7 year difference? blogslut May 2013 #60

I based this on the current laws in the state of Florida... ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #61

Okay blogslut May 2013 #62

You do whatever feels right for you. ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #64

That depends on the age of consent in their locality KitSileya May 2013 #63

How about asking your question in a way which distinguishes between Ms. Toad May 2013 #68

...and trash this thread... Iggo May 2013 #69

I'm more concerned with the older person's intent LittleBlue May 2013 #70

legal, but creepy. and if it were my daughter or son magical thyme May 2013 #71