General Discussion

Le Taz Hot

(22,271 posts)

19. As one who grew up in an

Fri May 31, 2013, 05:15 AM

May 2013

EXTREMELY abusive household can I just offer one bit of advice? Walk away from the caustic family members and caustic "friends" who choose not to accept you for who you are. These people are taking out their sick issues on you. PLEASE remember that THEY are the sick ones and that you are their victim. You are now an adult and you now have choices and I say you HAVE to walk away. I had to learn the hard way that sometimes the only thing family members have in common is DNA.

I could actually write for days on this subject but let me just say this: It took me a LOOOOONNNNGGGG time -- decades to figure out I am the warm, wonderful, funny, totally irreverent person I am and always was. You also have wonderful qualities but you've not been taught how to recognize those qualities so you have to teach yourself. Teach yourself that it's OK to say, "I am really good at _________," I have a talent for ____________," People like me because I'm _______________." Start there.

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This message was self-deleted by its author [View all] Dreamsoldier76 May 2013 OP

Thank you for this, Dreamsoldier76... CaliforniaPeggy May 2013 #1

Check out this group. rug May 2013 #2

I also want to encourage you to separate completely from your family of origin. SheilaT May 2013 #3

I could not agree more - you need a complete divorce from your family lunasun May 2013 #5

It's hard, very very hard. AtheistCrusader May 2013 #7

Same here. You can choose your friends, but not your family. FSogol May 2013 #32

I wish you lived nearer. tblue May 2013 #4

Thank you, Dreamsoldier. TDale313 May 2013 #6

I'm glad you shared this here KT2000 May 2013 #8

Ohana KauaiK May 2013 #9

I disagree somewhat with those who say separate completely No Vested Interest May 2013 #10

I have a personal saying airplaneman May 2013 #11

I’m a sober member of A.A. for many years. busterbrown May 2013 #12

AlAnon would be a great resource. Granny M May 2013 #15

Absolutely! busterbrown May 2013 #17

This message was self-deleted by its author busterbrown May 2013 #14

hey, I hear you DLnyc May 2013 #13

Some families are toxic and their children need to break ties with them Warpy May 2013 #16

.... handmade34 May 2013 #18

As one who grew up in an Le Taz Hot May 2013 #19

Hugs to you, Dreamsoldier magellan May 2013 #20

K&R B Calm May 2013 #21

You articulate well. GeorgeGist May 2013 #22

Hugs to you lunatica May 2013 #23

You may not realize it but Shankapotomus May 2013 #24

Welcome to DU. I wish you well. n/t Laelth May 2013 #25

... Arugula Latte May 2013 #26

You are not alone. And you have talent that can be tremendously helpful to others. nolabear May 2013 #27

I'm sorry you're hurting... redqueen May 2013 #28

Wow sagetea May 2013 #29

Two Spirit Rockyj May 2013 #31

Mawho (Choctaw) for 2 Spirits sagetea Jun 2013 #33

thank you for sharing noiretextatique May 2013 #30

I love you buddy DonRedwood Jun 2013 #34