Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

fredamae

(4,458 posts)
105. Been there done that myself
Tue Oct 22, 2013, 05:29 PM
Oct 2013

and as much as it hurt--my "friendship" with my person was a façade only truly "seeable" after the meltdown...I let both a response and the "friend" go...there was, at that juncture-nothing to salvage or any mystery left as to how this individual really sees the world-there was, for me-no "going back".

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Can you share any more details of your conversation? n/t BeeBee Oct 2013 #1
Agree with your observation ChazII Oct 2013 #6
I'm so sorry. That sounds more than a little unpleasant cali Oct 2013 #2
Unpleasant is a mild word....I think that after reading thoughts here, it might just be best to Ninga Oct 2013 #34
let it go warrior1 Oct 2013 #3
my thoughts too. Don't let her hate drive your actions. nt TeamPooka Oct 2013 #20
Ok warrior1 - will dig deep for some humor....nt Ninga Oct 2013 #35
I can't stand basing relationships on party lines anymore Puzzledtraveller Oct 2013 #4
Good on ya. Common Sense Party Oct 2013 #11
Faking divisions? HangOnKids Oct 2013 #12
Yeah, I spell it that way Puzzledtraveller Oct 2013 #13
You're what the world calls an "adult." Dreamer Tatum Oct 2013 #21
You'd be doing her a favor to make sure she knows people outside her bubble think differently. Gidney N Cloyd Oct 2013 #5
I suggest a simple "YAFI" response..... Wounded Bear Oct 2013 #7
But you simply MUST follow this with hamsterjill Oct 2013 #41
And don't forget to add "bless your heart". (nt) IdaBriggs Oct 2013 #64
And a standard southern FU, janlyn Oct 2013 #109
+1! SammyWinstonJack Oct 2013 #98
I would send an email. grasswire Oct 2013 #8
I like this one. Voice for Peace Oct 2013 #102
Words of Wisdom.......... Flo Mingo Oct 2013 #9
Other sayings: SharonAnn Oct 2013 #38
ooh warrior1 Oct 2013 #10
Too late. She already had the last word. TeeYiYi Oct 2013 #14
Words of wisdom? Yeah sure. Ganja Ninja Oct 2013 #15
Their desperation is almost palpable. lpbk2713 Oct 2013 #16
don't waste your time and energy trying to change what can't be changed Whisp Oct 2013 #17
Shine It On! MineralMan Oct 2013 #18
I hope you hung up while she was still spewing thecrow Oct 2013 #74
"I cannot let her have the last word" - why? Let it go. If you will feel better, write her a patricia92243 Oct 2013 #19
Why respond at all? What good would it do? nt Dreamer Tatum Oct 2013 #22
Did she complain when the govt made car insurance mandatory? Rex Oct 2013 #23
Advice is not always easy to dispense Jenoch Oct 2013 #24
see post #29 and thanks. nt Ninga Oct 2013 #37
Find the source zipplewrath Oct 2013 #25
A few months ago I defriended from facebook my ex. Marrah_G Oct 2013 #26
I'm sorry about his accident, but to me political stuff isn't silly at all. Arugula Latte Oct 2013 #43
Sunday afternoon, I would have said the same thing Marrah_G Oct 2013 #72
I would say that almost all people are a little bit of each hfojvt Oct 2013 #73
Now this, I pretty much agree with... nomorenomore08 Oct 2013 #112
It is silly Puzzledtraveller Oct 2013 #53
oh dear Skittles Oct 2013 #76
Me too Skittles Marrah_G Oct 2013 #77
Your story tells us how life can change forever in one stinkin second. Hope you have a chance to Ninga Oct 2013 #97
One cannot reason with the brainwashed who have had hate drummed into the heart, soul, indepat Oct 2013 #27
Well said, narnian60 Oct 2013 #103
"nuclear level of hate" - saw it in person yesterday UTUSN Oct 2013 #28
His line about "Food Stamps" may have come from Newt Gingrich's description of the Democratic Party whathehell Oct 2013 #52
I'll try if there's a slight chance, but convincing is a lost cause. I'm curious about his sources. UTUSN Oct 2013 #56
He sounds like a lost cause, but whathehell Oct 2013 #122
oh my goodness thanks for responding. Here is the gist of the conversation. Ninga Oct 2013 #29
Obama phones? Did Glenn Beck tell her about those? Rex Oct 2013 #45
I guess I just applied for membership into your club. Sadly the more I read and experience, tells Ninga Oct 2013 #49
It is sad when you cannot have a honest discussion with friends. Rex Oct 2013 #60
I Hear About RobinA Oct 2013 #47
We applied for Medicaid for my mother and boy what a process! sammytko Oct 2013 #66
Bookmaring this thread for this post alone. IdaBriggs Oct 2013 #68
I wouldn't even attempt to correct her. Jenoch Oct 2013 #48
and I bet maryellen99 Oct 2013 #57
she's had way too much koolaid noiretextatique Oct 2013 #84
just FYI, your argument is for Plan E, not ACA MisterP Oct 2013 #88
Don't RobinA Oct 2013 #30
Word of Wisdom - Don't respond kydo Oct 2013 #31
Good analogy. Faux, etc. is their drug and harder to fight, they feel it's insulting their IQ. freshwest Oct 2013 #114
I agree with the 'no action needed' crowd..if you should run into her somewhere you might share.. Tikki Oct 2013 #32
First time I responded to something like that madamesilverspurs Oct 2013 #33
You can't reason someone out of a position they haven't been reasoned into. SharonAnn Oct 2013 #42
^^^^ What YOU said ^^^^ .. . .n/t annabanana Oct 2013 #70
Ooh! I'm stealing that! reflection Oct 2013 #90
Just remember that you are replying for YOU; not for her. hamsterjill Oct 2013 #36
Ask her if she's outraged that so much taxpayer money goes toward corporate welfare. Arugula Latte Oct 2013 #39
I really really tried to point that out - but she said that maybe if she saw corporate welfare Ninga Oct 2013 #44
Aargh! Frustrating. Arugula Latte Oct 2013 #121
I abandoned rational argument during the Bush era. I now employ the "Fuck Off" strategy. RagAss Oct 2013 #40
I agree except in this case, I was not prepared for what I heard and responded like a deer caught Ninga Oct 2013 #46
Then that's what you say to her leftynyc Oct 2013 #61
Anyone using those descriptive terms is likely beyond your reach. cleanhippie Oct 2013 #50
She will expire before Mother Earth and Father Time reach her. Ninga Oct 2013 #51
Call her and tell her pitbullgirl1965 Oct 2013 #92
I cut my losses, realize they are narrow-minded, selfish little people, and move on. ScreamingMeemie Oct 2013 #54
Thank you for extending sympathy... nt Ninga Oct 2013 #79
I Would Not Take It I Would Counter Attack So Viciously Verbally It Would Shake Her Soul TheMastersNemesis Oct 2013 #55
Rs are mentally ill and/or criminals, it's been known for decades Corruption Inc Oct 2013 #58
You are not alone in being shocked at the hate. CrispyQ Oct 2013 #59
That is one thing I tell people like that - quit working and go on welfare if it so great. sammytko Oct 2013 #69
That sounds like standard republican thinking, I was ecstatic Oct 2013 #62
My sister is the same way, but she votes Dem sammytko Oct 2013 #63
I'd probably say something like, "wow, that's some hateful shit!" Waiting For Everyman Oct 2013 #65
The first time BellaKos Oct 2013 #67
I fully understand your experience as the 9AM conversation I had today is still ringing in my ears. Ninga Oct 2013 #81
I think it is fear of minorities riverbendviewgal Oct 2013 #87
so sorry for the loss of a friend... handmade34 Oct 2013 #95
Put her on "ignore" and go on with your life. bvar22 Oct 2013 #71
I've had this experience, and so has almost everyone else I know -- very disturbing markpkessinger Oct 2013 #75
Congratulate her for being in a 25% minority of Americans. IllinoisBirdWatcher Oct 2013 #78
You should video record the next discussion and watch it with her afterwards. bravenak Oct 2013 #80
maybe just tell her you hope her heart can heal from all that anger and hatred-its not healthy CarrieLynne Oct 2013 #82
Tell Her: "Fear is the path to the dark side," cer7711 Oct 2013 #83
I doubt she's talking about EXXON. Spitfire of ATJ Oct 2013 #85
it hurts I know florida08 Oct 2013 #86
As hard as it is, let it go. reflection Oct 2013 #89
I got a letter from a relative this week .... Zen Democrat Oct 2013 #91
How do folks like that address Jesus saying "He breathed life into us." ? That's a serious question okaawhatever Oct 2013 #99
Let her think she "won". MynameisBlarney Oct 2013 #93
Save your sanity ctsnowman Oct 2013 #94
pause when agitated... stillcool Oct 2013 #96
Seriously, don't waste your time. roamer65 Oct 2013 #100
Just tell her you're sorry she's gotten addicted to hatred Warpy Oct 2013 #101
That's why I don't talk much politics with friends. Sissyk Oct 2013 #104
Been there done that myself fredamae Oct 2013 #105
My general rule Frances Oct 2013 #106
Say, "We disagree on things politically but I value your friendship too much to care." nt Demo_Chris Oct 2013 #107
I call people like your friend "goners" kimbutgar Oct 2013 #108
"Goners" BellaKos Oct 2013 #115
You're better off without this person in your life. Ilsa Oct 2013 #110
Exactly. It's about the hate. n/t BellaKos Oct 2013 #116
Thanks. I responded last night and I said a silent good-bye to her when I clicked "send." nt Ninga Oct 2013 #120
she was looking for liberal ears to unleash her frustration Liberal_in_LA Oct 2013 #111
Email her the saying "There but for the grace of God go I [or you]". kiranon Oct 2013 #113
I like to use this: Tbaggers scream about Obamaphones from their $10,000 govt paid Hover Rounds. ErikJ Oct 2013 #117
Here's point by point response. ErikJ Oct 2013 #118
Thanks a million! I used some of this in my late night email to her. I was polite, funny and met Ninga Oct 2013 #119
Latest Discussions»General Discussion»I just hung up from being...»Reply #105