Listening in from the window seat: [View all]

[MineralMan]

Here's a sample from a future airline flight I'll be on. I always choose a window seat, since I like peering down at the landscape as we fly over it. These days, there's always someone sitting next to me in the middle seat. Here's what I expect to hear, now that the FAA is about to OK the use of cell phones during flights. BTW, I oppose that move, because I don't want to hear this, or anything else like it, on a flight:

Mary, I'm calling you from the plane.
...
No...from the plane. I'm on the plane!
...
Florida. I'm going to Cape Coral for a week.
...
CAPE CORAL!
...
No. FLORIDA.
...
Jim had to work, and isn't coming.
...
Actually, he's been sort of a jerk lately. I think he's seeing someone.
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I have no idea, but we haven't had sex in two weeks.
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TWO WEEKS!
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What do you mean by that?
....
You knew about it and didn't tell me?
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WHEN?
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How could you have betrayed me like that?
...
HE SAID WHAT?
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SHIT! You've ruined my vacation. I HATE YOU!
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Well, you're welcome to him. Wait until he wants you to...
DID YOU JUST HANG UP ON ME?
{Pause}
Emily? I'm calling you from the plane.
...
THE PLANE. I'M ON THE PLANE!
{plugging in my earbuds}