Porn Viewing: Do you know what you're talking about?

[RainDog]

112. interesting

my ex grew up as a catholic boy, so he had some... not weird but, to me, sort of strange attitudes about some things. the guilt was part of the pleasure some times, I think, and I wasn't interested in being anyone's judge. but porn, other than watching the Kama Sutra performed by two people, or Kaufman sorts of movies were about the extent of our interactions related to porn. I don't know if he consumed porn apart from our relationship - again - not something I care to know about if someone doesn't say. but he was entirely conventional, as far as it all goes - and so am I, really. boring, to some, I'm sure.

I had much more open experiences both before and after marriage, iow, that, to me, were healthier.

how do you think porn has been a problem in your sex life?

I have a funny strange story about someone who did something and I was like... wtf is this?!?! to myself - and then realized it was something he had seen on a porn video, most likely. So I said "why are you doing that?" and he stopped. I didn't know it was sort of a convention of porn until I read someone talking about a similar experience. The funny takeaway was... the response to your amorous actions shouldn't be bafflement... which is exactly how I responded. LOL.

The interesting thing was that he was obviously a consumer of porn, but had little actual experience with... I don't know how to put it... openness that's more vulnerable between partners. With real women? It's not like I'm the most experienced person in the world, but I thought... you know, I could really teach him how to make love if he wanted to learn. but he was like one of those people who never had to work that hard at something because he was...naturally gifted, anatomically. But, if I had had the chance, I would've said... you know, that's not going to last and you need to learn some technique. My experience has been that those who are anatomically gifted are often less technically skilled. Avis vs. Hertz, that sort of thing.

Mostly porn just sort of mystifies me because, as I said, it doesn't necessarily elicit the response I think it's supposed to. I hate to be that stereotypical girlie girl woman, but apparently I am.