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In reply to the discussion: This message was self-deleted by its author [View all]Ohio Joe
(21,898 posts)270. So... You think ownership of another person is some philosophical idea with merit
Really?
Then I think I know what side of the debate you really come down on.
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Pregnancy is risky and uncomfortable. Labor is agony. And women bear the brunt of the work
Warpy
Jan 2014
#160
There are individuals here with a vested interest in ensuring that NO discussion of this nature ...
11 Bravo
Jan 2014
#107
I'ts absurd and illogical to hold a child responsible for actions he/she had no control over
kcr
Jan 2014
#158
No. Don't pass judgement. I respect her decision and am waiting until she is ready to pursue a
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#20
It is, but I accept. I just turned 35. I can wait a little longer if she wants to wait.
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#22
why would you follow some parts of the culture (staying together if miserable) and not others...
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#92
Nice ethnocentric attitude. Culture is already fucked up according to me
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#263
Bullshit- you're doing a cafeteria version of the Chinese culture, so no reason to feel bound to it.
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#290
I'd be pissed if my husband posted my real name and email address online on some forum.
JTFrog
Jan 2014
#305
will you respect it if she chooses never to bear a child? she may expect to be ready someday...
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#91
Yes. . .I will. However, knowing Chinese culture and the overwhelming desire for
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#192
No, it's the height of ignorance to assume every woman wants to bear children….
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#202
Okay. . .buddy. I am an American. If I call my wife a "girl," she will scream she is not
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#212
I love the part about how he loves her because she totally spoils him, as if solicitous servicing
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#312
and WTF with all the- "I'm just posing a question" about a repulsive idea- not that I have ANY skin
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#315
the funny twist is- "I am so assimilated into this backward culture it is not my fault…"
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#319
and the weird comment- go ahead and contact her- it's futile! Bwaaah ha ha ha *twirls mustache*
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#338
QQ numbers are not phone numbers. God in heaven, I am so glad I left the States if this
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#356
You made the assumption I am mistreating her and saying "if you could, you'd tell her to run
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#359
It's called "calling a bluff." Good God, they give out their QQ numbers to complete strangers
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#362
They also do selective abortions, which is why there are more boys than girls in China
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#363
Ah, you are American, which explains why you do not try to respect the culture of those you're
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#288
I was noting you hand't picked up the Asian extra polite style of interaction, and instead insult
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#368
why did you post all these racial slurs here? you are not ignorant of American culture as to think
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#369
"This is different than men in China who will force the child on their wives"
amuse bouche
Jan 2014
#281
Refusal to have kids is a justifiable reason for divorce according to the Church
catbyte
Jan 2014
#109
Apart from an unhappy marriage, it sounds like he made the right call...
ReasonableToo
Jan 2014
#111
Because it's in the best interest of the child. He's not allowed to financially
geek tragedy
Jan 2014
#150
better question is why are you pushing anti-choice propaganda by claiming
geek tragedy
Jan 2014
#167
The man is financially responsible, not legally, for the child. Simple legalese.
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#203
maybe you should head over to Free Republic where your fellow forced birthers and anti-choice
geek tragedy
Jan 2014
#175
The child deserves to be financially supported by both parents. Period (nt)
PotatoChip
Jan 2014
#343
adigal is a forced birther and anti-choice--thinks that if a man gets a woman pregnant
geek tragedy
Jan 2014
#174
I do not know your gender, ergo the neutral term. It's a deficiency of the English language
geek tragedy
Jan 2014
#185
She agreed to take his opinion into consideration when she married him. nt
freedom fighter jh
Jan 2014
#128
I am sure she is taking his opinion into consideration. She just isn't following it. As is her right
Squinch
Jan 2014
#143
I had this problem with someone once, "you asked my opinion but didn't do what I advised". Well, yes
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#204
Again, I will clarify. she wants a child. . .not now though. I accept.
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#31
again, the discussion happened. the answer is "not now. soon, but not now."
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#46
Then you have your answer. She has consented to have children when she's ready, if she's being
Cleita
Jan 2014
#47
IMHO, since you and she are married, this is something you both need to discuss
BlueCaliDem
Jan 2014
#52
If your wife is saying "not now, soon," then I would suggest that you talk to her about
msanthrope
Jan 2014
#63
"only option"? They can wait, see if minds are changed later. He can be involved with other children
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#205
Since the OP said he is fine doing that, yes, it is great advice. Glad you agree.
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#208
Uh huh. He said he is fine waiting. So nice of you to be so concerned for others. Bless your little
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#215
And he has you to tell him whether to be happy and content. How sweet for you to take that on.
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#219
"I'm curious how much fathers and husbands matter in family planning"=advise him to get a divorce?
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#228
"get a divorce" doesn'tanswer the question of "how much say does a man...have" at all. Nope.
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#243
If he's not getting what he wants in the marriage, then yes, it's a great answer.
Vashta Nerada
Jan 2014
#248
And since he says he is fine with waiting, well, you MUST know best, after all! Right?
uppityperson
Jan 2014
#249
You have to think about the child. If a woman is the least bit hesitant or reluctant
Common Sense Party
Jan 2014
#84
I had an abortion when I was 16. It hurt my father deeply, but it was what was best for me
liberal_at_heart
Jan 2014
#181
I am 64 and deliberately childless, and none of your reasoning applies to me.
WinkyDink
Jan 2014
#131
For my part, none. Although we can discuss it, the ultimate decision will always be hers and hers al
LanternWaste
Jan 2014
#105
hopefully you've discussed the reasons that she's not ready to be a mother
ReasonableToo
Jan 2014
#115
After my second child, I just knew I couldn't handle anymore. I didn't realize how hard it would be
liberal_at_heart
Jan 2014
#147
"Again, I am not one of these men's movement assholes" - Yet you want control over anothers body?
Ohio Joe
Jan 2014
#163
No, it was a question. I am so glad I left the States seven years ago.
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#220
Non-sense. The OP presented MRA bullshit as though it were a point worthy of debate
Ohio Joe
Jan 2014
#231
So... You think ownership of another person is some philosophical idea with merit
Ohio Joe
Jan 2014
#270
The question is simple... And very hard to misunderstand. I'll put it here again
Ohio Joe
Jan 2014
#333
Nonsense. There is no room for debate this "philosophical idea" of controlling women's reproduction
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#292
did you miss the part where he said he "almost completely" agrees, LOL? there is no almost pregnant
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#347
he put a persons right for control of their own body up for debate- and is angry that he was
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#353
When medical science figures out a way to extract a fetus without harming the mother, we get a voice
Xithras
Jan 2014
#216
I understand that. Which is how I felt at the beginning. I just wanted to see if I wasn't alone.
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#261
Everyone agreed that you had every right to divorce her if you wanted a kid, but daring to ask
liberal_at_heart
Jan 2014
#285
too bad he is not assimilated enough to shake off the rude combative attitude, ha ha.
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#320
Having taken care of literally thousands of women during childbirth over the years...
Butterbean
Jan 2014
#250
The woman faces the possibility of dying. You do not. Therefore the decision rests with her
riderinthestorm
Jan 2014
#252
You married a woman 11 years younger than you. I'm sure there are good reasons for that, but
Egalitarian Thug
Jan 2014
#264
I married a woman younger than me because most of the women I've met my age are either
Nanjing to Seoul
Jan 2014
#265
I didn't say you were, in fact I assumed that that is out of the question.
Egalitarian Thug
Jan 2014
#266
Thug, LOL? Are you attempting to pepper this conversation with the insults du jour at DU?
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#294
Oh, LOL. I had noticed that they picked up "buddy" from a post I wrote on another thread
bettyellen
Jan 2014
#311
Simple, pair yourself with someone who wants the same things that you do. eom
mfcorey1
Jan 2014
#273
NO ONE has the right to force any woman to bear a child against her wishes.
kestrel91316
Jan 2014
#350
If one parent wants a child and the other dosen't, then don't have the child. The parent who
1monster
Jan 2014
#354
You cannot force someone to be pregnant... Not for one day, not for nine months... Not at all.
targetpractice
Jan 2014
#367