General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: This message was self-deleted by its author [View all]OwnedByCats
(805 posts)to have ownership over one's body. He did say that many men in China may have this attitude, but that he doesn't share it. I took it as a question, does the man have any say? I guess what I mean by say is an expression of their feelings on the matter but the ultimate answer is that the very last decision is with the woman. Whether it's about starting a family, whether it comes down to an actual pregnancy - terminating it or not. It is down to the woman ultimately. I just think there is nothing wrong with both parties discussing it first. Man can give input, whether he supports it or not, the woman must be the deciding factor here. Others take his question to mean "is it ok to force a woman to have a child?", which of course answer is no, but that's not how I took it.
I happen to be a woman so of course I would think it's the woman's decision, why would you presume otherwise? You and I took the debate differently. I was just trying to point out that he doesn't seem to think the way you think he does - that is all. You then have to come down on me as though I also believe ownership is right and you couldn't be more dead wrong.
It just comes down to how we both perceive the question, you took it differently. That's fine, but you shouldn't assume what others believe. I guess any and all discussions on whether men have any input on this subject should be banned because even though we explore deeper, not to mean the man has the final say, but should a man's feelings be taken into consideration by the woman? Depends on the woman and her circumstances, depends on the relationship and the man.
How many times have I heard men demand a woman should have an abortion when she doesn't want to? Many times! Is it still up to her? Hell yes, but there have been women who have done it anyway to please the man, which is just as bad as forcing her to have the baby. Comes down to controlling men who obviously need to learn they should not be allowed to call the shots. I don't think the OP is quite in that category, you do. Just agree to disagree.