General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: I Look Down on Young Women With Husbands and Kids and I'm Not Sorry [View all]LWolf
(46,179 posts)The point is that, unless they come with a protected life-long trust fund and a pre-nup cleaving that fund only to them, house wives are dependents with less power than their spouses.
While some men may not take advantage of that, the fact remains that it makes women vulnerable. What are the stats on the divorce rate in the United States, and where are these women left when their husband leaves them for someone younger and more challenging?
There is an inherent imbalance of power in relationships where only one person is making the living and that very imbalance of power does not bode well for long-term relationship health.
The issue is not about you or your wife, and neither are my comments. If you and your wife are happy with your choices, and you stay with her and remain faithful in every way to the marriage, more power to you both. The bigger picture, however, remains.
I think the same thing can be said for house husbands, except that they may find it easier to re-enter the working force after some time gone.
In an idealistic utopia, one person working could easily support a family, the non-working person would have equal rights to everything, and anybody who wanted a job at a living wage could have one without the cutthroat, desperate competition for decent jobs. Then one parent could stay home and the other could work fewer hours and be home more, or both could work part-time and both be home more, and families would be healthier. I'm an idealist, so I will keep fighting for just that. Meanwhile, though, I can't ignore the reality. Having personally failed at two longer-term marriages, 10 and 12 years each, I'm relieved that I have some skills to support myself, having attended college a little at a time over may years until done, while working part-time, and then full time, and raising kids. Nobody now, or ever, has had MY back financially, and nobody ever will.