General Discussion

Ms. Toad

(35,569 posts)

80. For starters,

Sun Mar 30, 2014, 08:42 AM

Mar 2014

You might go spent some time with #rapecultureiswhen on twitter, and pretend for a half hour or so that it is a serious matter instead of treating it as a joke. Use your ears (eyes) instead of your mouth (keyboard) and really listen to the people this culture impacts most directly, and then ask yourself what you can do - personally - to make a difference.

I'll bet if you do that you can come up with something far more productive than the snark you have offered here. Like - for example - it wouldn't be much of a stretch, in response to the public schools tweet, for you to imagine going to your next local school board meeting and finding out if that is true there, and - if so - working to encourage them to include a discussion of consent in an appropriate place in the curriculum.

ETA: Here is another good place to start listening, and asking what you can do to help make a positive change.

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Highlight:

#rapecultureiswhen Is the Perfect Answer to Everyone Who Denies Rape Culture Exists [View all] redqueen Mar 2014 OP

Yet so many still deny such a thing exists... Ohio Joe Mar 2014 #1

It's so exhausting. Squinch Mar 2014 #2

K&R nt Zorra Mar 2014 #3

The post was alerted on and was 6-0 to leave it. Warpy Mar 2014 #4

Who the fuck would alert on this? cyberswede Mar 2014 #5

Results.. one_voice Mar 2014 #7

Juror 6 rocks! cyberswede Mar 2014 #10

Yes, indeed! In_The_Wind Mar 2014 #74

I agree... CSStrowbridge Mar 2014 #103

"Telling women to stop talking about rape and rape culture gives rapists cover" yes. and we have seabeyond Mar 2014 #106

Absolutely! nt laundry_queen Mar 2014 #182

Rape culture threads seem to make the alerter feel guilt. As Juror 6 said, "Fancy that." Squinch Mar 2014 #16

No women's issues in public BainsBane Mar 2014 #34

I am not one bit surprised... Ohio Joe Mar 2014 #6

Agreed BainsBane Mar 2014 #35

clearest evidence of misogyny you gonna get around here. mopinko Mar 2014 #79

Can you post the jury results? Sheldon Cooper Mar 2014 #8

Rape culture is when an OP like this gets alerted on at a progressive website. nt Zorra Mar 2014 #12

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Yep Squinch Mar 2014 #18

you know it. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #37

For the win. n/t Ms. Toad Mar 2014 #48

Spot on. CrispyQ Mar 2014 #117

On a website this big, there are inevitably trolls, anyone can alert... Hippo_Tron Mar 2014 #118

This thread was alerted on! sheshe2 Mar 2014 #14

Because, I guess, rape culture is just a mentality. Squinch Mar 2014 #20

To bad! sheshe2 Mar 2014 #22

And of course, our bodies have a way of shutting-that-whole-thing-down anyway, calimary Mar 2014 #32

Oui. sheshe2 Mar 2014 #43

If this OP was a REAL hide-worthy OP cui bono Mar 2014 #150

How utterly sad and pathetic. Sheldon Cooper Mar 2014 #21

Why we need to keep talking about ‘rape culture’ sheshe2 Mar 2014 #25

That's just another way of saying, "We don't want to annoy the men by being too vocal Squinch Mar 2014 #27

Yes, Squinch. sheshe2 Mar 2014 #38

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #69

The RAINN statement is rank bullshit: blackspade Mar 2014 #31

Are you saying that I am full of bullshit? sheshe2 Mar 2014 #33

Definitely not you! blackspade Mar 2014 #41

Thank you blackspade. sheshe2 Mar 2014 #54

Is he deliberately not getting it? CrispyQ Mar 2014 #121

From reading the posts in this thread and others, there seems to be a striking similarity between... AdHocSolver Mar 2014 #51

Good observations blackspade Mar 2014 #148

dingdingdingding!! we have a winner: That's EXACTLY the connection zazen Mar 2014 #203

I hope you can find it. redqueen Mar 2014 #204

BWAH! or, I know you were severely traumatized years ago by a series of capitalist abuses, zazen Mar 2014 #209

here it is: from Counterpunch: Bob Jensen's interview re book "Getting Past Capitalism" zazen Mar 2014 #211

You know what's really old? BainsBane Mar 2014 #36

It is getting old, Lunacee_2013 Mar 2014 #61

Of course it was. redqueen Mar 2014 #45

i have an idea of who might have alerted it JI7 Mar 2014 #46

Interesting that they haven't posted in the thread. nt redqueen Mar 2014 #49

It's probably the same one who sent the SOP alert BainsBane Mar 2014 #149

An SOP alert, too? redqueen Mar 2014 #153

SOP alert. why>?????? lol. womens issue only belongs in a group? no fuggin way. lol. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #164

This message was self-deleted by its author A-Schwarzenegger Mar 2014 #60

As already noted by several others... malthaussen Mar 2014 #91

yup. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #97

Blurred lines. progressoid Mar 2014 #9

Being completely out of touch, I looked up the lyrics to the song. CrispyQ Mar 2014 #123

In fairness, it is *very* catchy. redqueen Mar 2014 #126

It is. But I prefer Marvin Gaye for that funk. progressoid Mar 2014 #171

It was a cringe-worthy moment. progressoid Mar 2014 #172

k and r--people ask why I don't do facebook--that pic and the fact that it was not removed is niyad Mar 2014 #11

Pic blew my mind. And it's OK? Jesus fucking christ. toby jo Mar 2014 #17

Pictures and sparkly images just like it have been posted in The DU Lounge Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #39

K&R Soylent Brice Mar 2014 #13

K&R! sheshe2 Mar 2014 #15

k&r to view later chervilant Mar 2014 #19

Rape culture exists when you allow a rapist to go free seveneyes Mar 2014 #23

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #78

Doesn't mean it's not, does it? mbperrin Mar 2014 #113

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #116

wow. hey woman... meldramatic. we have more rigths than anywhere else. STFU.... seabeyond Mar 2014 #120

No value. mbperrin Mar 2014 #122

cause we have menstrual cycles and get all emotional. shruggin, .... evo psych. lol. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #127

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #136

You seem awful naive. KitSileya Mar 2014 #138

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #139

Yes it is naive, KitSileya Mar 2014 #143

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #152

If you cannot see that aspirations are largely created by the society mbperrin Mar 2014 #156

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #159

Who said they should be gender exclusive? They clearly are, since mbperrin Mar 2014 #155

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #158

This message was self-deleted by its author A-Schwarzenegger Mar 2014 #163

for now. good to see. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #165

amazing the people Texasgal Mar 2014 #24

K & R Those tweets are a sad commentary justhanginon Mar 2014 #26

Welcome to DU, justhanginon! calimary Mar 2014 #40

Thanks for the kind welcome. justhanginon Apr 2014 #215

But we're going backwards these days, dontchaknow. calimary Mar 2014 #50

rapecultureiswhen people deny, in the fact of evidence, that it exists, because to admit it would niyad Mar 2014 #28

Do you know which culture thinks Aerows Mar 2014 #29

"A culture that believes that if a girl drinks, she is "open season"? " IME, many Americans believe raccoon Mar 2014 #73

You are of course correct. redqueen Mar 2014 #112

K&R! blackspade Mar 2014 #30

Kick BainsBane Mar 2014 #42

K&R! hrmjustin Mar 2014 #44

I rarely agree with you zappaman Mar 2014 #47

Kick and rec. riqster Mar 2014 #52

Kick, kick, kick!!! Heidi Mar 2014 #53

So...what's your solution to this so-called "rape culture?" davidn3600 Mar 2014 #55

No one here is suggesting any such measures. (nt) Heidi Mar 2014 #58

It doesnt seem anyone is suggesting any measures at all davidn3600 Mar 2014 #62

This message was self-deleted by its author A-Schwarzenegger Mar 2014 #65

I don't alert posts unless they are overly vile...not my style davidn3600 Mar 2014 #66

Message auto-removed Name removed Mar 2014 #67

This message was self-deleted by its author A-Schwarzenegger Mar 2014 #68

Increased surveillance in public areas shaayecanaan Mar 2014 #72

Rape vs murder is like apples to oranges. WCLinolVir Mar 2014 #105

different studies, 38-64% of college student males said they would rape if the KNEW they could seabeyond Mar 2014 #107

More like comparing green apples with red apples... shaayecanaan Mar 2014 #167

WTF?? Prefabricated? Projection maybe? WCLinolVir Mar 2014 #197

+1. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #206

All rape is considered evil but not all rape is considered equally evil davidn3600 Mar 2014 #168

You seem to be talking to yourself. When has anyone else on this thread mentioned sentencing? nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #186

I must have misunderstood what the other poster was getting at... davidn3600 Mar 2014 #187

Some people do have an overly narrow definition. Rape need not involve physical force. nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #189

Well I go by what the end result is. WCLinolVir Mar 2014 #199

I'd discuss this with you, as I sincerely tried to once before, but I am pretty sure you will Squinch Mar 2014 #77

+1 redqueen Mar 2014 #114

Really, you are so dependable in your inanity. Squinch Mar 2014 #76

For starters, Ms. Toad Mar 2014 #80

Besides the fact that no sane person would suggest them, none of those would stop rape anyway. nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #83

I love it when people post to self identify like this ... etherealtruth Mar 2014 #84

me too. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #93

Exactly etherealtruth Mar 2014 #95

Here's a starting point: mbperrin Mar 2014 #115

We could start by requiring all colleges to require a mandatory seminar on consent CrispyQ Mar 2014 #130

but that is focusing rape too much on the boys/men and hurts their feelers. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #131

Not hurting anyone's feelings, it's just not going to reach men who are capable of such acts davidn3600 Mar 2014 #161

i have actually taken the time to explain it to you, in all respect, experience, and know. seabeyond Mar 2014 #166

Someone who thinks education is a waste of time is a waste of time. -nt CrispyQ Mar 2014 #212

This is a good start BainsBane Mar 2014 #140

That was an excellent article. CrispyQ Mar 2014 #162

"so-called "rape culture?"" NCTraveler Mar 2014 #198

There's been a lot of that posted here lately. redqueen Mar 2014 #201

Thank you. JackRiddler Mar 2014 #56

Kicked... Out of Time Man Mar 2014 #57

K&R Lunacee_2013 Mar 2014 #59

K&R DeSwiss Mar 2014 #63

thank you so much. I don't know what to say beyond that. cali Mar 2014 #64

K & R In_The_Wind Mar 2014 #70

If you want sex so much Shankapotomus Mar 2014 #71

wow. So, are you saying that you think rape is sex? are you being ironic? are you giving us another Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #81

Well, you're right Shankapotomus Mar 2014 #87

No, Sorry. Rape is ALL about power and NOTHING about sex. Please, educate yourself. Thanks. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #92

Sorry Shankapotomus Mar 2014 #96

^ Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #98

The back of my heels have road rash tea and oranges Mar 2014 #141

That you equate sex with the reproductive system is very telling. Peace. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #142

Meaning What? In the Context of Violence? nt tea and oranges Mar 2014 #144

for you, a song: Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #145

Nothing to do with being horny. If it were, then rape would be even more common than it (sadly) is. nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #85

I know Shankapotomus Mar 2014 #88

That is not, by and large, why people rape. Ms. Toad Mar 2014 #86

Yes Shankapotomus Mar 2014 #89

Thanks for your evolving views on this subject. redqueen Mar 2014 #124

Many here are so vocal and active Shankapotomus Mar 2014 #214

K&R n/t lupinella Mar 2014 #75

I am sick of people saying that there isnt a rape problem DiverDave Mar 2014 #82

+1. i have two boys also, and have had many conversation and they have a father that seabeyond Mar 2014 #90

Not hard to believe this was flagged by someone, who shall remain nameless. WCLinolVir Mar 2014 #94

You mean it was juried? Can you post the results? It won't show the names and is otten done. I only freshwest Mar 2014 #169

This message was self-deleted by its author A-Schwarzenegger Mar 2014 #173

Thank you very much. I'll read that. I missed the post by one voice. n/t freshwest Mar 2014 #174

Rape is caused by the conscious decision of a small percentage to commit a violent crime. Nye Bevan Mar 2014 #99

looking at what causes cancers, like smoking is a total waste of time, when addressing the killer seabeyond Mar 2014 #101

rape culture is why so many of those criminals go uncharged or escape conviction. KittyWampus Mar 2014 #102

But using terms like "white privilege" or "rape culture" helps put things in a larger social context nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #104

Let me see if I understand you correctly... malthaussen Mar 2014 #108

Statistically speaking you are wrong. WCLinolVir Mar 2014 #109

Are you suggesting there is no white privilege in this country? mbperrin Mar 2014 #119

Yes, he is saying they do not exist. When they put it in quotes, it is exactly what they mean Ohio Joe Mar 2014 #200

And if there were a small amount of rapes, you might have a point... Hippo_Tron Mar 2014 #137

Thank you for this. CFLDem Mar 2014 #178

The analogy is imperfect, but... malthaussen Mar 2014 #100

Well said it fits many circumstances. n/t freshwest Mar 2014 #170

a women's photo with "Tape her and Rape her" doesn't "violate Facebook community standards"?? whathehell Mar 2014 #110

more. that photo does not seems to stop men in ther tracks to question their position that seabeyond Mar 2014 #111

The complete disregard for this and other feminist issues by facebook redqueen Mar 2014 #132

always interesting being school by a man with 20 posts how us women are melodramatic, should seabeyond Mar 2014 #125

"appreciate what we are allowed in this country compared to other countries" redqueen Mar 2014 #128

twinklin' in joy woman. always. damn, life is awesome as we make it. seabeyond Mar 2014 #129

Wow, I've seen women blamed for men voting republican before... redqueen Mar 2014 #133

sounds like it to me. am i wrong? seabeyond Mar 2014 #134

So, let's discuss it... cyberswede Mar 2014 #146

Thank you Redqueen. thucythucy Mar 2014 #135

K&R Solly Mack Mar 2014 #147

Yup. I think all rapists or would-be rapists belong behind bars. I don't know what their Sarah Ibarruri Mar 2014 #151

This post presents the case very well. Those who deny such a culture exists HERVEPA Mar 2014 #154

Not the only options ... brett_jv Mar 2014 #185

thank you, the alerter shld be taken to the woodshed and shipped off to MRA Island bettyellen Mar 2014 #157

Wondering if anyone in the Jury realized that they can Alert the Alerter or other Juror comments freshwest Mar 2014 #184

Excellent post. K&R Louisiana1976 Mar 2014 #160

Excellent examples. And regarding Noam Chomsky about the condition of many women in the world: freshwest Mar 2014 #175

excellent additions. you are absolutely right on. nt seabeyond Mar 2014 #176

Thanks. freshwest Mar 2014 #177

Thank you. redqueen Mar 2014 #180

While I understand the good intentions involved in raising the issue ... brett_jv Mar 2014 #179

'real problem' why do you have to qualify it in that manner/ to support your argument. how about seabeyond Mar 2014 #205

If you're really unable to ascertain how a 'campaign' like this could backfire ... brett_jv Mar 2014 #213

Rape culture = all men are potential rapists and all women are potential victims davidn3600 Mar 2014 #181

I bet if you tried, you could come up with a dumber post. jeff47 Mar 2014 #188

"If she says no, don't do it. If you've already started and she says no, you have to stop." nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #190

Since when does a rapist care if a woman is screaming "no?" davidn3600 Mar 2014 #191

There are different kinds of rapists. jeff47 Mar 2014 #193

I was suggesting the alcohol is to blame for the rapist's behavior davidn3600 Mar 2014 #195

Which is an excuse, why? jeff47 Mar 2014 #196

Saying no, not screaming no. cyberswede Mar 2014 #194

hey david... make up a whole friggin story, however you choose, throw out to derail conversation seabeyond Mar 2014 #207

That the one sick rape joke stood on facebook Tsiyu Mar 2014 #183

Even people who agree with that vile shit don't think it's "funny." They just pretend to nomorenomore08 Mar 2014 #192

...when other men just assume that I want to have sex all the time... Deep13 Mar 2014 #202

ya deep. it has so aggressively become a caricature of all that a man is. it is sad. and it use seabeyond Mar 2014 #208

true. nt Deep13 Mar 2014 #210