General Discussion

Patiod

(11,816 posts)

40. I was in your boat exactly

Tue Apr 22, 2014, 02:42 PM

Apr 2014

Worked freelance as a consultant and took care of my Dad, also after 25 years on my own.

Had to laugh at your comment about Stuff - we had to put everything we owned in the garage, and my Dad still complained about the few things we did bring into the house ("YOU'RE BREAKING UP THE HOUSE! WHY DO YOU NEED ALL THAT STUFF ANYWAY??! JUST THROW IT OUT" <- he was fairly deaf) And like you, it took a while to find our equilibrium. I think it was harder for my Dad to learn that sometimes I knew best (at least in term of medical/health issues)

But otherwise, it worked out pretty well. I had time to build my little business without pressure, and he got stellar round-the-clock care. He also taught my husband, who grew up in a rowhouse, how to take care of a suburban house, which has come in handy now that we live here.

The biggest downside is that I put on 25 pounds eating Old Guy Food (potatoes and gravy with every meal) that I'm still trying to get rid of.

Feel free to PM me if you need a sounding board.

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Moving in with parents becomes more common for the middle-aged [View all] Liberal_in_LA Apr 2014 OP

I can't imagine how incredibly hard it must be Warpy Apr 2014 #1

+ 1 russspeakeasy Apr 2014 #3

In some cultures, this is actually pretty normal, and in fact, could serve to conserve resources. AtheistCrusader Apr 2014 #12

I'm going by what actually did happen when seniors could live independently Warpy Apr 2014 #20

I guess it depends on a variety of factors. AtheistCrusader Apr 2014 #22

It is ok if it is chosen - NOT ok if it becomes the norm TBF Apr 2014 #36

that was me at 40 after 1.5 years of unemployment/underemployment.. frylock Apr 2014 #16

i would like to see it differently. a family unit. like not too far back. seabeyond Apr 2014 #2

The tipoff to how well living with extended family works for most people Warpy Apr 2014 #5

interesting points. i can see that. nt seabeyond Apr 2014 #6

+1 nt riderinthestorm Apr 2014 #27

Good point, but every case is different Patiod Apr 2014 #37

It's nice when it works out well Warpy Apr 2014 #43

There you go! DeSwiss Apr 2014 #10

Glad to know that your parents bullsnarfle Apr 2014 #13

My parents are dead. DeSwiss Apr 2014 #15

No kidding. People from cookies and milk families Warpy Apr 2014 #21

Fortunately the dysfunction in my family died. AtheistCrusader Apr 2014 #24

I hear you Warpy Skittles Apr 2014 #41

This message was self-deleted by its author Warpy Apr 2014 #23

makes sense considering you have to pay $3000 a month to buy a shack snooper2 Apr 2014 #4

So many ignorant comments in LATimes.com. alp227 Apr 2014 #7

Disgusting. narnian60 Apr 2014 #28

Right, because 33 years of Republican ginned-up capitalism is the President's fault. HughBeaumont Apr 2014 #32

yes, that's how latimes anonymous posters behave Liberal_in_LA Apr 2014 #35

End goal of the 1%ers - 3 generations living under one roof is developing world MillennialDem Apr 2014 #8

Not just the middle aged, but the 'just out of college' too. MADem Apr 2014 #9

37 and back to living in the parents basement. obxhead Apr 2014 #11

Most of the blame lies not with POTUS, but with Congress. Arugula Latte Apr 2014 #18

GOPers in Congress are blocking everything Cali_Democrat Apr 2014 #19

i don't think this is all bad , it's the norm for many cultures JI7 Apr 2014 #14

I think it is pretty cool hfojvt Apr 2014 #38

The causation might be bad, but I don't think multi-generational households should be Sen. Walter Sobchak Apr 2014 #17

It is extremely common dotymed Apr 2014 #25

My mom's house isn't big enough for me to move back home and live with her riderinthestorm Apr 2014 #26

It all comes down to your relationship and your space spinbaby Apr 2014 #30

Rremember many of these situations are sparked by parents who need help. Marshall III Apr 2014 #29

That's my situation. Staph Apr 2014 #31

My hat is off to you, I know how hard you are working. Marshall III Apr 2014 #33

I was in your boat exactly Patiod Apr 2014 #40

I'd rather swim with sharks that live with my family. alarimer Apr 2014 #34

elderly mom in story makes middle aged move in daughter go to bed at 7pm Liberal_in_LA Apr 2014 #42

This message was self-deleted by its author gollygee Apr 2014 #39