General Discussion

pnwmom

(110,262 posts)

89. After I read that article by the child psychologist,

Wed Jul 30, 2014, 01:19 AM

Jul 2014

I looked for ways to let my oldest, who was around 10 or 11, do more. The first thing I thought about was the movies, because I used to go to the movies at this age. I remember calling up her best friend's mother and saying, well, what do you think? And she agreed, so we asked the girls if they'd like to go to the movies without us. And that felt like a big deal.

Which was lucky, because when my daughter was in 6th grade, she took a test at school and then something arrived in the mail, inviting her to a program in southern California. She was thrilled, and she was literally jumping up and down. And I was petrified, but I called around and heard good things about the program. And then I called down there and got more information, and figured out how the travel would work from Seattle. She flew with another kid -- a boy she only met in the airport. (He was half a foot shorter -- she looked like his babysitter.) It was scary for me but not scary for her at all. And so when she went to a college on the other side of the country that was no big deal either -- for her.

I think more than half of raising a child is training the parents to let go. And yet we shouldn't blame it all on "helicopter parents." Society is pushing parents that way. It's really such a shame.

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Mother arrested for letting son walk to park alone [View all] Liberal_in_LA Jul 2014 OP

This is getting out of control JustAnotherGen Jul 2014 #1

Some nut came to our neighborhood and asked what all these children were doing out side alone lunasun Jul 2014 #42

My mom would be sitting in prison these days JustAnotherGen Jul 2014 #59

I would be her cellmate SoCalDem Jul 2014 #61

Still the same except for the cellphones some have . We are lucky that there are lunasun Jul 2014 #72

That's my life now.... Bettie Jul 2014 #82

Mom would send us out and not let us back in most of the day csziggy Jul 2014 #83

Glad I wasn't raised in this crazy era aint_no_life_nowhere Jul 2014 #68

You know, if it were me who was not going to let my child go to the park alone anymore anyway, hughee99 Jul 2014 #2

You really must be joking dballance Jul 2014 #6

Not kidding at all. hughee99 Jul 2014 #15

Like I said. Hysteria seems to rule these days. dballance Jul 2014 #24

I wasn't suggesting that the child was in serious danger, hughee99 Jul 2014 #27

And there's nothing wrong with her quote. HuckleB Jul 2014 #28

So out of this situation, your comment is that the mother needs better PR skills? TransitJohn Jul 2014 #88

Yes, very astute of you to notice. hughee99 Jul 2014 #100

It harms the child if his Mom is arrested. Mariana Jul 2014 #34

Exactly. HuckleB Jul 2014 #17

The instances of those reporting it has declined... LanternWaste Jul 2014 #44

Good Grief. Doesn't anyone remember when... dballance Jul 2014 #3

The Old Dinner Bell 4Q2u2 Jul 2014 #18

Exactly. See ya, have fun, be home for dinner. n/t PoliticAverse Jul 2014 #35

The good old days of no seat belts and lax drunk driving laws... LanternWaste Jul 2014 #46

Too funny. I remember our first car w/ seat belts. dballance Jul 2014 #47

WHAAAT??? Clearly this is INSANE Warpy Jul 2014 #4

My Mom would still be in jail if this had jaysunb Jul 2014 #5

My mom too JustAnotherGen Jul 2014 #7

mine too... 60s and 70s Liberal_in_LA Jul 2014 #10

I walked home from school that far Lex Jul 2014 #8

Our district EXPECTED children to walk and they were not eligible for a bus pnwmom Jul 2014 #19

Same here. We're raising a nation of veal calves. Throd Jul 2014 #25

amen to that.. and probably plays into why so many 30 yr olds SoCalDem Jul 2014 #63

Crushing college debt is but a fraction of it. davidthegnome Jul 2014 #97

Until the post WWII era, most families were in multi-generational homes SoCalDem Jul 2014 #98

Same here - TBF Jul 2014 #73

The arrest is over the top, but there is no place in this country... polichick Jul 2014 #9

Most school districts EXPECT 7 year olds to walk a half a mile or longer to school. pnwmom Jul 2014 #12

I'd never let such a young child walk that ALONE. polichick Jul 2014 #13

That's fine as your personal parental decision. But it makes no senses as public policy. n/t pnwmom Jul 2014 #16

I'm sure most schools suggest walking with a parent or in a group... polichick Jul 2014 #21

Ours didn't anything about that. You were either eligible for a bus, or you weren't. pnwmom Jul 2014 #26

Sure, you're a "walker" or not... polichick Jul 2014 #29

Actually, in many places crossing guards don't exist. HuckleB Jul 2014 #30

That was one example of safety rules... polichick Jul 2014 #40

My district does not require children to walk in a group, and neither does this girl's. pnwmom Jul 2014 #32

Parenting comes into it, no matter what the school requires or suggests... polichick Jul 2014 #37

But that isn't the issue here. The arrest is the issue. pnwmom Jul 2014 #38

In this thread, letting kids roam seems to be "the issue" too. polichick Jul 2014 #41

Our schools do the same. 840high Jul 2014 #85

I used to walk to school as a kindergartener hfojvt Jul 2014 #65

I did too, but there was always a group and often someone's parent... polichick Jul 2014 #76

Interesting. HuckleB Jul 2014 #20

You don't have "walkers" at your school? Well, the St. Lucie district does. pnwmom Jul 2014 #36

Well, I'm lucky enough that I can walk with him each morning. HuckleB Jul 2014 #74

Wow. A librarian friend of mine says that the libraries are full of children pnwmom Jul 2014 #75

Oh, I know. I don't get it. HuckleB Jul 2014 #84

After I read that article by the child psychologist, pnwmom Jul 2014 #89

I walked a little more than that to school every day in first grade fishwax Jul 2014 #80

Letting a 7 yr old walk alone is not wise. gerogie2 Jul 2014 #11

His school almost certainly expects 7 year olds to walk that distance every day. pnwmom Jul 2014 #14

+1 HuckleB Jul 2014 #22

Yup. I just looked up the distances for walkers for my old schools, and my kids' schools riderinthestorm Jul 2014 #54

probably not alone hfojvt Jul 2014 #67

Thank you. While I don't think arresting parents is the answer, school is very different from ... moriah Jul 2014 #69

This boy had a cell phone. How many of us had that when we walked to school? pnwmom Jul 2014 #70

You want CPS to investigate a parent for letting a kid walk to a park alone? Comrade Grumpy Jul 2014 #53

Yes. gerogie2 Jul 2014 #58

Wow, nanny culture is so popular! n-t Logical Jul 2014 #77

Meanwhile, 2 million kids live in homes with unsecured guns... HuckleB Jul 2014 #23

Good point. pnwmom Jul 2014 #39

Watch some old Leave it to Beaver episodes Duer 157099 Jul 2014 #31

The 24 hour news cycle makes us feel under seige Lex Jul 2014 #43

Leave it to Beaver wasn't real, ya know. polichick Jul 2014 #45

no, it was a far more pampered and protected childhood than what most kids knew Douglas Carpenter Jul 2014 #50

It was a fantasy about suburban family life. Sweet but fiction. polichick Jul 2014 #51

The St. Lucie school district expects kids to walk 2 MILES. Don't the cops know that? pnwmom Jul 2014 #33

Good grief. At some point the kids are going to get out that bubble and do naughty things. Tierra_y_Libertad Jul 2014 #48

my goodness when I was that age kids that age were running all over the place and it is certainly Douglas Carpenter Jul 2014 #49

Kids had up to a 1 mile walk in elementary school, 1.5 miles for middle and high schools for me riderinthestorm Jul 2014 #52

Of course this should not be something for which one is arrested. gvstn Jul 2014 #55

My mom would have been arrested a lot!! Avalux Jul 2014 #56

This reminds me of the story where the father made his boy walk home LittleBlue Jul 2014 #57

7 seems a bit young depending on the circumstances but an arrest is out of line. Warren DeMontague Jul 2014 #60

Insane. Coventina Jul 2014 #62

I would let a 7 year old marions ghost Jul 2014 #64

When I was a kid we could walk all over our neighborhood without supervision cpwm17 Jul 2014 #66

I really think it has to do with the neighborhood the child walks through. MoonRiver Jul 2014 #71

I grew up in the city of Orlando, which even back then ('60's) was bigger than Port St. Lucie steve2470 Jul 2014 #78

Mom arrested after letting 7-year-old go to park alone (another version) steve2470 Jul 2014 #79

Sounds like the busybodies are taking over the world. n/t pnwmom Jul 2014 #91

I would walk to park and school at that age abelenkpe Jul 2014 #81

So this mother didn't break any law Mariana Jul 2014 #86

Not only is there no law, but they're charging her with a FELONY. pnwmom Jul 2014 #92

Well cops have to find a new hobby Tetris_Iguana Jul 2014 #87

They're training people into being helicopter parents. nt pnwmom Jul 2014 #94

The arrest was a bit much. Iron Man Jul 2014 #90

Any area could have sex offenders. And did when we were young. too. pnwmom Jul 2014 #93

Touche�. Iron Man Jul 2014 #95

Welcome to DU, Iron Man! pnwmom Jul 2014 #96

Thank you kindly. Iron Man Jul 2014 #99