General Discussion

IdaBriggs

(10,559 posts)

23. If you read the post, you know I've been laying it out there.

Tue Sep 9, 2014, 08:42 AM

Sep 2014

And yes, I have a whole bunch of people judging me at the moment, with the difference being *I* made a choice to bring my past into this discussion, while she didn't choose to become the public face of domestic violence.

I totally understand someone choosing denial as a coping strategy, as opposed to facing having to end a relationship that means a lot to them, and then undergoing years of therapy to figure out *why* they ended up there in the first place. I am comfortable with the life choices I have made, unhappy about those made by people I care about, and mature enough to know there is *nothing* I can do except try to explain this absolutely UNEXPLAINABLE THING to people who don't think about how they might react if someone they love physically assaults them.

Trust me. I am all kinds of judge-y. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

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She married him because she is an idiot. [View all] IdaBriggs Sep 2014 OP

I think she is not an idiot, but married him to walk away with half of his fortune. B Calm Sep 2014 #1

Rice probably has not earned a cent exboyfil Sep 2014 #35

He has eared his last dollar in football BlueStreak Sep 2014 #103

You make several good points, not the least of which is that it's learned behavior. Arkansas Granny Sep 2014 #2

"Mind control", "mentally ill", "slave" and "gold digger" seem to be the "go to" IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #8

Calling her an idiot isn't that far out of the fucking box. n/t moriah Sep 2014 #25

It's outside the box pintobean Sep 2014 #27

Yeah, that's the only "out of box" thinking happening here, for sure. moriah Sep 2014 #29

Oxytocin is a bigger liar than alcohol is Warpy Sep 2014 #101

Victims of domestic violence are not idiots. pintobean Sep 2014 #3

Thank you for missing the point. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #4

The point is pintobean Sep 2014 #6

We *do* blame victims of domestic violence who stay in the relationship. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #10

Another reason women don't send their perpetrators to jail boston bean Sep 2014 #12

Did she seriously look afraid of him to you? IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #17

This message board is also not about victim-blaming. moriah Sep 2014 #24

No Ida, "we" do not. You are doing it, but many of us know better. Speak for yourself. bettyellen Sep 2014 #48

No "we" don't. Beaverhausen Sep 2014 #53

Perhaps your point would have been better made without Skidmore Sep 2014 #7

Calling her an idiot is flat out victim blaming. Gormy Cuss Sep 2014 #22

Welcome to a difference of opinion. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #28

You repeated the assertion in your text (see, I read it.) Gormy Cuss Sep 2014 #32

Post removed Post removed Sep 2014 #38

I never agree to disagree with anyone. That's dismissive. Gormy Cuss Sep 2014 #39

I saw that thread. It was one of those that inspired this one. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #41

Yes, "agreeing to disagree" is dismissive Gormy Cuss Sep 2014 #84

Did you see how she edited the OP to speak of her hide here. boston bean Sep 2014 #92

Circumventing the jury system like that is ill-advised. Gormy Cuss Sep 2014 #94

No, there is not a violation in doing that. NYC_SKP Sep 2014 #95

Did I show "outrage" somewhere? boston bean Sep 2014 #96

It is circumventing the restrictions placed on her account pintobean Sep 2014 #98

Then, despite whatever family experience you're going by, you show a lack of understanding. moriah Sep 2014 #33

Let me pull it up for you. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #40

Calling women idiots doesn't help them reclaim the power they've surrendered, though. moriah Sep 2014 #49

Perspective is everything: you saw me "attack the victim for standing up to her abuser." IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #58

I think she's a damn fool. cwydro Sep 2014 #76

Considering she's now giving interviews and making statements like this one? Chan790 Sep 2014 #47

Thank you Beaverhausen Sep 2014 #51

Good post Ida.... trumad Sep 2014 #5

The analogy that comes to my mind is TexasProgresive Sep 2014 #9

She married him because she thought he'd change... Historic NY Sep 2014 #11

then she can stop him from "over reacting" the next time by NOT provoking him. Oktober Sep 2014 #13

I am glad you see the STUPID in the comment. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #19

Ida was describing what the woman was thinking, not what Ida herself believes. nt tblue37 Sep 2014 #37

This message was self-deleted by its author mentalsolstice Sep 2014 #80

Just when you think you've seen everything, a thread like this comes along. Sheldon Cooper Sep 2014 #14

Well, this is helpful. Brickbat Sep 2014 #15

Good post (content), terrible title. You make many great points but calling her an 'idiot' rather pampango Sep 2014 #16

It is the not-so-secret opinion of most people. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #21

Wow. Starry Messenger Sep 2014 #18

Please read what you just wrote. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #26

God, for someone who hectors other on rudeness, you sure take the cake. Starry Messenger Sep 2014 #97

Wow, we've certainly a lot of people who seem to know everything about everyone NightWatcher Sep 2014 #20

If you read the post, you know I've been laying it out there. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #23

Here are the bright shiny moments from Ida's life that she has shared on DU mentalsolstice Sep 2014 #81

That does help explain why people stay with their abusers treestar Sep 2014 #30

I sympathize with Mrs. Price. ladjf Sep 2014 #31

I think that people like you are the problem. Not the victim. LexVegas Sep 2014 #34

I think the problem is MOSTLY the guy who hit her. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #43

I wouldn't call her an idiot. If anything, I would say she made an idiotic decision. Tatiana Sep 2014 #36

This is a good point that you've made, Tatiana. AverageJoe90 Sep 2014 #117

How does your calling a victim of domestic violence an "idiot" help advance Heidi Sep 2014 #42

Ask the same question about any of the other ways we as a society have handled this discussion. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #50

This is one of those issues pipi_k Sep 2014 #44

Your post moved me to tears (and I've been staying strong in this thread). IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #60

At first I disagreed with you calling her an idiot. But you are right. Autumn Sep 2014 #45

The whole situation is very complex exboyfil Sep 2014 #46

Janay Palmer Rice has a bachelors degree in communications riderinthestorm Sep 2014 #111

Income security is always a factor exboyfil Sep 2014 #112

There are many DUer posts to the contrary. FEAR is a constant, not income security riderinthestorm Sep 2014 #113

Pretend I've been living under a rock. Who are we talking about here? AtheistCrusader Sep 2014 #52

A football player (Boston Ravens?) named Ray Rice IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #66

Holy shit... AtheistCrusader Sep 2014 #67

Most of us agree with you. She apparently does not. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #70

I have no words... AtheistCrusader Sep 2014 #71

Baltimore Marrah_G Sep 2014 #110

You should take idiot out of your subject line rbrnmw Sep 2014 #54

Yeah, my sister felt like that too loyalsister Sep 2014 #55

AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Results of your Jury Service ChisolmTrailDem Sep 2014 #56

Which juror were you? pintobean Sep 2014 #61

#7. Problem? nt ChisolmTrailDem Sep 2014 #62

That was my guess pintobean Sep 2014 #63

Based on...what exactly? ChisolmTrailDem Sep 2014 #64

"it doesn't break the rules that lead to a hide" pintobean Sep 2014 #72

So, that I and 5 other jurors voted to let it stay, says what...exactly? BTW, ChisolmTrailDem Sep 2014 #73

I can't answer that pintobean Sep 2014 #74

So, what exactly are you trying to say about my voting to leave it? nt ChisolmTrailDem Sep 2014 #78

I would have hid it. zappaman Sep 2014 #114

Thank you for sharing this. IdaBriggs Sep 2014 #68

Yw, though I don't care for the 'idiot' language. nt ChisolmTrailDem Sep 2014 #69

Calling her an idiot is offensive, mean and ugly lunatica Sep 2014 #57

I guess the OP feels the need to get in a smack at Janay Rice too. Lex Sep 2014 #105

She is not an idiot, she has made choices that are not in her best interest. Avalux Sep 2014 #59

FYI: you are not an authority on DV or her. You just aren't. PeaceNikki Sep 2014 #65

and ironically idiotic. nt La Lioness Priyanka Sep 2014 #88

I imagine you feel very empowered by pretending to know why or why not any given couple stays togeth LanternWaste Sep 2014 #75

+1 leftstreet Sep 2014 #77

I know someone who went back and forth in a relationship before she married the guy. Tikki Sep 2014 #79

You should just delete this piece of shit OP. You've already been locked out of it. PeaceNikki Sep 2014 #82

You never cease to amaze! mentalsolstice Sep 2014 #83

What the everloving fuck is the matter with you? nt LeftyMom Sep 2014 #85

Jury results WilliamPitt Sep 2014 #86

Gee, how am I ever going to find your comment? ;) LeftyMom Sep 2014 #90

a lack of empathy? a desire to be iconoclastic? general douchery? La Lioness Priyanka Sep 2014 #87

It is an important issue, I'm not sure why you could not see the problem, in a place where AuntPatsy Sep 2014 #89

Calling an abused woman an idiot is a form of abuse. You have it in you. NCTraveler Sep 2014 #91

My thought exactly. Lex Sep 2014 #106

IMO, like Snookie and her fans, there's a lot of "it" going around, it's an American thing. NYC_SKP Sep 2014 #93

People choose what's familiar: Alcohol, abuse, neglect, whatever. Smart people do, too. lindysalsagal Sep 2014 #99

All walks of life! mentalsolstice Sep 2014 #104

it is her choice Niceguy1 Sep 2014 #100

Fox News responds to domestic violence. Saffron Sep 2014 #102

She is NOT an idiot, she knows HIT is his response. It is much more complicated than that. uppityperson Sep 2014 #107

I find your point of view on this revolting. Marrah_G Sep 2014 #108

I don't agree with you steve2470 Sep 2014 #109

No, she's an idiot for defending him and his actions. flvegan Sep 2014 #115

To be honest, Ida.....I disagree with some of your points. AverageJoe90 Sep 2014 #116